Lady Anal Lovers II

[BetterLuver]

There is nothing wrong with you. First off.. I read your whole convo with RA (only out of sheer interest) and it really sounds like you need to be more direct with him.. He is not seeing any of the hints you gave him.. Im really shocked that he gave you the "too much wetness" comment. Im baffled... im thinking an open honest conversation with him might work for you..

But nothing is wrong with you.. THAT i can assure you. =)

He has a major problem with intimacy. I should state straight away that this is only on a sexual level. He is very affectionate...he holds my hand while he drives, he cuddles up to me in public, he kisses me deeply and passionately throughout the day. Then, when we are in the bedroom, it's as if a switch is flipped off. We never kiss during sex. You already know he doesn't go down on me or make any attempt at rimming. We had hoped tonight would be the beginning of a change for him. And it was better...he held my face in his hands and kissed me deeply while he was inside me. He even said "I love you," which I have never heard during sex. He did play with my clit, but in the end it came down to me bucking and writhing against his fingers...he just didn't seem to know what to do on his own. And he went down on me...for maybe 2 minutes. He went nowhere near my ass. While he was between my thighs, I left no doubt that I appreciated his licks (even if they were shallow and infrequent). I moaned and said things like "that's it, that feels soooo good, I love the way you are making me feel, etc." But I swear, right as he seemed to be finding his way, he stopped. And immediately inserted his dick. Again, the penetration was delicious. But I felt slighted. I mean, 2 minutes of foreplay? On a night "devoted to me?" So when he took a break to spoon me, I guided his hand between my legs and tried to show him what I like. But it was as though his hand was made of concrete! His touch was heavy and slow. And not teasingly slow. Just lifeless. So I just held his fingers to my clit and began to buck and writhe. And then I faked an orgasm when it became too awkward to continue. Neither of us came until I suggested mutual masturbation. We got ourselves off, cleaned up, and now here I am. When I tried to talk to him about it, he said he wasn't use to so much wetness from a girl. Am I some kind of freak with a drooling pussy problem?!?!?

I'm so frustrated. I can't keep the tears back. I don't know what's wrong with me. This is the healthiest, safest, most fulfilling relationship I have ever been in. I don't know why I'm letting the sexual voids bother me so much!

 

[RAddams]

He has a major problem with intimacy. I should state straight away that this is only on a sexual level. He is very affectionate...he holds my hand while he drives, he cuddles up to me in public, he kisses me deeply and passionately throughout the day. Then, when we are in the bedroom, it's as if a switch is flipped off. We never kiss during sex. You already know he doesn't go down on me or make any attempt at rimming. We had hoped tonight would be the beginning of a change for him. And it was better...he held my face in his hands and kissed me deeply while he was inside me. He even said "I love you," which I have never heard during sex. He did play with my clit, but in the end it came down to me bucking and writhing against his fingers...he just didn't seem to know what to do on his own. And he went down on me...for maybe 2 minutes. He went nowhere near my ass. While he was between my thighs, I left no doubt that I appreciated his licks (even if they were shallow and infrequent). I moaned and said things like "that's it, that feels soooo good, I love the way you are making me feel, etc." But I swear, right as he seemed to be finding his way, he stopped. And immediately inserted his dick. Again, the penetration was delicious. But I felt slighted. I mean, 2 minutes of foreplay? On a night "devoted to me?" So when he took a break to spoon me, I guided his hand between my legs and tried to show him what I like. But it was as though his hand was made of concrete! His touch was heavy and slow. And not teasingly slow. Just lifeless. So I just held his fingers to my clit and began to buck and writhe. And then I faked an orgasm when it became too awkward to continue. Neither of us came until I suggested mutual masturbation. We got ourselves off, cleaned up, and now here I am. When I tried to talk to him about it, he said he wasn't use to so much wetness from a girl. Am I some kind of freak with a drooling pussy problem?!?!?

I'm so frustrated. I can't keep the tears back. I don't know what's wrong with me. This is the healthiest, safest, most fulfilling relationship I have ever been in. I don't know why I'm letting the sexual voids bother me so much!

First of all you need to get it straight that there is absolutely nothing wrong with you. There is also no such thing as a pussy that is too wet. It is very clear that the problems are all on his end and I suspect he had these problems long before he met you. It really does suck that you not satisfied sexually and there maybe nothing you can immediately do to solve this problem. The solution probably involves him admitting there is something wrong with him and then seeking help to solve it. It sounds like he genuinely loves you so it's not normal for him to put such little effort into pleasuring you.

 

[Farrah]

There is nothing wrong with you. First off.. I read your whole convo with RA (only out of sheer interest) and it really sounds like you need to be more direct with him.. He is not seeing any of the hints you gave him.. Im really shocked that he gave you the "too much wetness" comment. Im baffled... im thinking an open honest conversation with him might work for you..

But nothing is wrong with you.. THAT i can assure you. =)

Thank you Better. I appreciate you taking the time to address my concerns. And advice on how to give constructive criticism without hurting him?

And seriously, can there be too much wetness? I don't have anything to compare to. I know I get very, very wet...can that be a bad thing?

 

[BetterLuver]

NO there can never be TOO much wetness.. That what shocks me... The wetness is the foundation of the goodness.. If she isn't having a good time, then she is NOT wet.. so didnt really understand that.

And the only advice that i have to to engage him in his most comfortable setting but ask him directly.. Ask him FIRST if there is anything sexually that he has not tried that he wants to try.. and then he is gonna ask you. And then you can tell him. At least to see his reaction, if he is not feeling that he will tell you.. almost make a game of it.. like a sexy naughty question/answer game.. Trust me he will play, all of us do. =)

good luck beautiful..

Thank you Better. I appreciate you taking the time to address my concerns. And advice on how to give constructive criticism without hurting him?

And seriously, can there be too much wetness? I don't have anything to compare to. I know I get very, very wet...can that be a bad thing?

 

[Farrah]

First of all you need to get it straight that there is absolutely nothing wrong with you. There is also no such thing as a pussy that is too wet. It is very clear that the problems are all on his end and I suspect he had these problems long before he met you. It really does suck that you not satisfied sexually and there maybe nothing you can immediately do to solve this problem. The solution probably involves him admitting there is something wrong with him and then seeking help to solve it. It sounds like he genuinely loves you so it's not normal for him to put such little effort into pleasuring you.

Well, first and foremost, thanks a bunch for trying to make me feel better about my... er, persistent leak. Just when I didn't think I could possibly develop another complex... Gah! I know there are threads about women who enjoy large cum shots from their lovers. And there are some girls who don't dig it as much. In your opinion, is it possible that female juices can be a turn off for some men??? Have you experienced women who cum significantly more than others, and if so, did you find it to be less-than-pleasant?

He has admitted that he has a problem with intimacy. And I feel like we made some progress there tonight. But secondary to my fear of hurting him is my fear that I'm just never going to experience oral sex (vaginal, much less anal) again. I'm sure I'll feel somewhat more optimistic in the morning. Tonight, however, I am a mess. And a leaky mess, to boot.

 

[Farrah]

NO there can never be TOO much wetness.. That what shocks me... The wetness is the foundation of the goodness.. If she isn't having a good time, then she is NOT wet.. so didnt really understand that.

And the only advice that i have to to engage him in his most comfortable setting but ask him directly.. Ask him FIRST if there is anything sexually that he has not tried that he wants to try.. and then he is gonna ask you. And then you can tell him. At least to see his reaction, if he is not feeling that he will tell you.. almost make a game of it.. like a sexy naughty question/answer game.. Trust me he will play, all of us do. =)

good luck beautiful..

Thanks again for your reply. Here's the other thing I haven't mentioned. My man has kinks and fetishes that he says he was never able to explore before me. And I have been very, very (I won't go into details, but when I say "very," I really do mean to the full extent) open to helping him fulfill his desires and see his dreams realized. Some of these fetishes were never on my radar prior to being with him, but I am so happy to be the person he can "go there" with. In all honesty, I don't feel like I've held him back or restricted him in any way. I feel like I've given him complete support and encouragement. I guess that's another reason I feel "slighted."

Anyway, I've totally hijacked this thread with my problem. I apologize to each of you for that.

 

[RAddams]

Well, first and foremost, thanks a bunch for trying to make me feel better about my... er, persistent leak. Just when I didn't think I could possibly develop another complex... Gah! I know there are threads about women who enjoy large cum shots from their lovers. And there are some girls who don't dig it as much. In your opinion, is it possible that female juices can be a turn off for some men??? Have you experienced women who cum significantly more than others, and if so, did you find it to be less-than-pleasant?

He has admitted that he has a problem with intimacy. And I feel like we made some progress there tonight. But secondary to my fear of hurting him is my fear that I'm just never going to experience oral sex (vaginal, much less anal) again. I'm sure I'll feel somewhat more optimistic in the morning. Tonight, however, I am a mess. And a leaky mess, to boot.

In terms of wetness every woman is different and in my opinion the wetter the better. Dryness would make more sense as a turn off but even that can be cured with some lube.

For me giving pleasure to the woman I love is among the best things in life. If tomorrow I lost my cock in some horrible circular saw accident I would still gladly suckle my wife's pussy and ass for hours when ever she pleased.

If next week I somehow no longer enjoyed giving her pleasure I would visit every doctor and shrink for miles to find out what's wrong with me.

As for "I am a mess. And a leaky mess, to boot." all I can say is yummy yummy yummy.

 

[Farrah]

In terms of wetness every woman is different and in my opinion the wetter the better. Dryness would make more sense as a turn off but even that can be cured with some lube.

For me giving pleasure to the woman I love is among the best things in life. If tomorrow I lost my cock in some horrible circular saw accident I would still gladly suckle my wife's pussy and ass for hours when ever she pleased.

If next week I somehow no longer enjoyed giving her pleasure I would visit every doctor and shrink for miles to find out what's wrong with me.

As for "I am a mess. And a leaky mess, to boot." all I can say is yummy yummy yummy.

Horrible circular saw accident? That made me giggle. And for that, I can not give you thanks enough.

As for the rest...lucky, lucky, lucky wife.

 

[Farrah]

In terms of wetness every woman is different and in my opinion the wetter the better. Dryness would make more sense as a turn off but even that can be cured with some lube.

For me giving pleasure to the woman I love is among the best things in life. If tomorrow I lost my cock in some horrible circular saw accident I would still gladly suckle my wife's pussy and ass for hours when ever she pleased.

If next week I somehow no longer enjoyed giving her pleasure I would visit every doctor and shrink for miles to find out what's wrong with me.

As for "I am a mess. And a leaky mess, to boot." all I can say is yummy yummy yummy.

P.S. I hereby nominate you and your wife as Lit's hottest couple. Talk about yummy yummy yummy!

 

[BetterLuver]

Thanks again for your reply. Here's the other thing I haven't mentioned. My man has kinks and fetishes that he says he was never able to explore before me. And I have been very, very (I won't go into details, but when I say "very," I really do mean to the full extent) open to helping him fulfill his desires and see his dreams realized. Some of these fetishes were never on my radar prior to being with him, but I am so happy to be the person he can "go there" with. In all honesty, I don't feel like I've held him back or restricted him in any way. I feel like I've given him complete support and encouragement. I guess that's another reason I feel "slighted."

Anyway, I've totally hijacked this thread with my problem. I apologize to each of you for that.

No need to apologize for having an open healthy discussion. I feel empowered to make that call since i started this thread. =)..

But if he wants you to be open to his needs why cant he be open to yours?..

 

[RAddams]

P.S. I hereby nominate you and your wife as Lit's hottest couple. Talk about yummy yummy yummy!

Thank you for the compliment.
Unfortunately my wife doesn't enjoy posting on Lit like I do. She is more into having cyber partners in personal messages.

 

[LLPisme]

Well, if I had an opportunity to stop the tears, I missed it. Thank you for your kind words. Thank you for your empathy. Thank your for your suggestions.

He does seem willing to work on it, but then the time comes or whatever, and he just balks. My biggest issue right now is how to work on this without making him feel bad. It's killing me that he may be thinking he can't be the lover I desire. He's truly a wonderful man. He's smart and talented and so, so funny. He's interesting and articulate. He's got common sense for miles. He cares about me. He cares so, so much. I don't want him to think that this is a deal breaker, because it's not. But it really, really sucks. It makes me feel badly about myself...my body, my desires, my whole being. I want to be proactive about this so that neither of us hurts any more than we do right now. But how do I help him with the how-to's without making him feel like less of a man?

VA Girl - I feel so bad that you tried so hard to get through to him in so many different ways. It sounds like he either has some pretty concrete hang ups, very little experience, or low testosterone. I hope he warms up to your needs. Otherwise, you deserve to find someone that matches your level of passion and adventurousness! It's a gift that shouldn't be wasted or shoved into the back of your mind.

 

[Farrah]

VA Girl - I feel so bad that you tried so hard to get through to him in so many different ways. It sounds like he either has some pretty concrete hang ups, very little experience, or low testosterone. I hope he warms up to your needs. Otherwise, you deserve to find someone that matches your level of passion and adventurousness! It's a gift that shouldn't be wasted or shoved into the back of your mind.

Hi there, and thanks so much for your words of support. I am very happy to report that my guy has come a long way in a short amount of time. He has been much more attentive in the areas I discussed in this thread, and he genuinely seems to be enjoying himself. I received some great advice here, and I tried to put it all to good use. It seems to be working!

 

[BetterLuver]

Hi there, and thanks so much for your words of support. I am very happy to report that my guy has come a long way in a short amount of time. He has been much more attentive in the areas I discussed in this thread, and he genuinely seems to be enjoying himself. I received some great advice here, and I tried to put it all to good use. It seems to be working!

congratulations!.. Great for you!

It will ONLY increase the bond within the relationship.

 

[LLPisme]

Yay yay yay!! So glad to hear it. I'm glad that you found a way to get through to him in a way that he was able to hear and implement.