Ladies, whats the truth?

[DaveDFW]

Hello all!

This is my first post to these boards, and I'm not sure where to start...

I, like so many other men, would like to get a bigger penis. I've looked on the internet and found a whole bunch of sites with claims of penis enlargement that appear to be too good to be true.

Now before I get the "size doesn't matter" bit let me explain. I am average as I understand it, just a bit over six inches long, but a little on the thin side. My wife has not ever complained to my face, but I am suspicious. I know she had at least two lovers in the past that were in excess of eight inches (I knew one of them, so I know its true). Lately her desire for sex with me has greatly diminished, she never initiates it, and when I do I'm rejected 90% of the time.

I suspect she is/has been fooling around on me, looking for the thrill of a more endowed lover. Or possibly she is just cooling off as a result of hormonal changes (she is 33, as am I). I guess I just really don't know. We both are fitness fanatics, so I don't think it is a physical repulsion (I am 6'1", 205 pounds, hockey player type, in reasonably good shape).

I don't know where to go from here. I'm looking for advice from the ladies here, and the guys too. What is possibly going on? I love my wife more than anything else, and I do try to let her know that by doing 'special' things like spontaneous flowers, back and foot rubs, etc. Secondly, has anyone had or heard of positive experiences with any of the multitude of penile enlargement techniques? Even if one does work, is it what i really need?

 

[forgetunome]

My Humble Opinion...

You two need to sit down and talk to each other in a non-confrontational way...and see if that's why her drive seems to have "diminished" with you. Is she taking any medications that could cause lower sex drive? But...really before you go to the extent of putting your penis through the stretcher....talk it out...and see what is really bothering her, if anything. And hopefully, it's not as bad as you think. Communication can go a long ways!

By the way WELCOME TO THE BOARD!!! I hope you enjoy your stay!!

 

[Mustang Sally]

You men, thinking it's all about the penis. If she's fooling around, there's probably more going on in her mind than dissatisfaction with the size of your dick. The problem could really be anything. You'll just have to outright ask her what's going on. Don't drive yourself crazy trying to guess.

 

[Cheyenne]

If you have been married for awhile and her sex drive has suddenly changed, that isn't likely to be caused by the size of your penis. What about new medicine? Other stress in your lives? Kids? Work? It could be a multitude of things, alone or in combination. Ask her! She may not know herself. Counseling could help in that case. Or a trip to her GYNO, just in case it is physical.

No one enjoys feeling like they are being rejected. Talk to your wife and let her know that is how you feel. But skip the penis enlargement kits.

 

[Guest]

 

[CW]

Dave,,,

There are some smart sexy ladies that have answered you,,, and they are mostly saying the same things,,,

I'd take their advice if I was you,

 

[Whispersecret]

I know I'm always recommending books, but I can't help it.

I just happen to be reading a book that addresses couples where one of you has a higher sex drive than the other. It's right on target with your situation, Dave. It's called "Hot Monogamy," by Dr. Patricia Love and Jo Robinson. She talks about the physical differences between men and women and why often the man feels rejected and the woman feels guilty for not wanting it. Then she offers a ton of ways to rectify the situation.

I borrowed my copy from the library. It might be worth looking at. Good luck!

 

[pandora]

Dave,
I've been through your situation and the best advice I can give you is like the others. Talk to her. Sometimes a woman lets every little mundane thing bother her and sometimes it can be much more. If she hasn't complain about your size then why should you. Changing yourself to what you think she wants and needs will only cover any problem there may be. Talk to her, tell her you're concerned about your relationship and let her know that she is the most important thing to you, but save your time and money on the enlargement. Oh by the way, welcome to the board. Have fun.

 

[teresafannin]

I will agree with the others, size is not what is important. My fiancee is about 6-7" & not the biggest man I have ever been with, but he is the best I have ever been with. Communication is crucial, you need to sit down with your wife & talk about all of this. Age should not be a problem, I am 41, my fiancee is 42. We have been together for nearly 4 years & I have had the best orgasms of my life during that time. Your wife sounds kind of young to be going through hormonal changes, but lots of exercise can affect one's health, too much of a good thing & all that. She might need to have a complete checkup, just to rule out anything physical. Avoid the enlargers, I have seen some of them & they look like they could potentially cause damage. Good luck, I hope things work out for you, you sound like a great guy. Welcome to the board, lots of nice people here.

 

[dancinvixen]

I have to agree. As with Teresa, my husband is definitely not the largest I have been with either. But for me, his 6-7 inches is perfect. Before my husband, the only orgasms I ever had, were self induced and definitely lacking in something. Now, my husband can bring me off 5-6 times a night, and still leave me wanting his body, but too tired to do anything about it.
Communication is definitely the key. Every couple has their ups and downs, but you can never truly work anything out, unless you sit down and talk about it together as a couple rather, than one of you worrying about what the other one is doing. If her sex drive has decreased, it could be so many things. And she could also be feeling badly about her lack of drive. So, Sit down with her, and tell her how much you love her, and talk about your problems.

 

[sze27]

Hi,

Just to add some balance here I guess I should post and say that I really love big cocks. The bigger the better for me - it is really an erotic thing more than a physical thing though. A bit like one-upmanship with myself to find an even bigger guy!

Despite what I have said, I was seeing this Korean guy last summer that must have had 5 inches max and he was killing me with it. Something about the shape, how hard he was (all of the time!) - he just hit my spot every time. So, duh, it doesn't really matter.

I think size can be important, but sex is really about intimacy with someone exciting - and guys can turn me on for a great many reasons - and in a lot of ways.

Love Sze

 

[KillerMuffin]

There has to be more for her to just up and stray from you like that. Not just penis size, though she may be saying that to cover up the real problem. Most people don't want to face their real problems. You may be accepting, or even propogating the penis size thing to cover up the real problem.

I suggest open, honest, mediated communication. This sounds like one of those situations that rapidly degenerate into the ever so much fun "Blame Game."

Other than that, try doing the romance thing, romance her back to you, kinda like you've been doing. Just show her how much you love her and how sexy and attractive you still find her.

Be prepared, however, to face the truth about whats really wrong in the relationship. Be even more prepared to face the infidelity you suspect. Could you live with her after it's been proven? Can you forgive her? Can you trust her? There is no love without trust. People who claim to love without trusting are merely paying lip service to it. This trust can be rebuilt, eventually.

Don't worry about your penis, that's why you have fingers and a tongue. The G-Spot isn't 12 inches inside of her either. You have more than enough to not only get the job done, but get the job done well. Maybe better sex videos/books.