July 5th is....
- Thread starter ABSTRUSE
- Start date
!!!
G
Guest
Guest
Is this the new
jeff foxworthy thread?
jeff foxworthy thread?
G
Guest
Guest
Re: Is this the new
You know you're a redneck if the front porch falls in an kills more than 7 dogs.
If your boss invites you to a house warming party so he has help taking the wheels off, you may be a redneck.
If you have ever spray painted a girls name on a water tower, you might be a redneck.
If you have ever climbed a water tower to defend your sisters honor, you might be a redneck.
If your working TV is sitting on top of you NON-working TV, you just might be a redneck.
If there is an old washing machine on your front porch, You might be a redneck.
vella_ms said:
You know you're a redneck if the front porch falls in an kills more than 7 dogs.
If your boss invites you to a house warming party so he has help taking the wheels off, you may be a redneck.
If you have ever spray painted a girls name on a water tower, you might be a redneck.
If you have ever climbed a water tower to defend your sisters honor, you might be a redneck.
If your working TV is sitting on top of you NON-working TV, you just might be a redneck.
If there is an old washing machine on your front porch, You might be a redneck.
Virtual_Burlesque
Former Ecdysiast
- Joined
- Mar 31, 2004
- Posts
- 4,083
You may be a redneck if . . .
You think that watching wrestling is foreplay.
You own an Elvis Jelly mold.
Your child’s first ever words were - 'Attention K-Mart shoppers!'
The biggest city you've been to is Wal-Mart.
You’ve ever committed a crime with a lawn mower.
Your washing line consists of 6 pair of trousers, 2 squirrels and a half-eaten possum...
Your idea of quality entertainment is a 12-pack and a fly-swatter.
Your pillow case doubles as your bowling bag.
You've ever sold your car for gas money.
You and your dog both use the same toilet.
You base a fridge purchase on how many cases of beer it holds.
You watch Jerry Springer to see if any of your relatives are on the show today.
You take a 6-pack cooler to church.
Your poppy's last words were "Hey ya'll look what I can do!"
You get pissed while mowing the grass.
You have ever peed in the sink because your moma was hogging the outhouse.
You start every story with "Y'all ain't gonna believe this!"
You reckon 'manual labor' is a Spanish ambassadar.
Your mutt's collar costs more than the clothes you are wearing.
You ever got a lap dance from your sister!
Your 2-year old got more teeth than you do.
You take a gunny sack to an all-you-can-eat bar.
You think that watching wrestling is foreplay.
You own an Elvis Jelly mold.
Your child’s first ever words were - 'Attention K-Mart shoppers!'
The biggest city you've been to is Wal-Mart.
You’ve ever committed a crime with a lawn mower.
Your washing line consists of 6 pair of trousers, 2 squirrels and a half-eaten possum...
Your idea of quality entertainment is a 12-pack and a fly-swatter.
Your pillow case doubles as your bowling bag.
You've ever sold your car for gas money.
You and your dog both use the same toilet.
You base a fridge purchase on how many cases of beer it holds.
You watch Jerry Springer to see if any of your relatives are on the show today.
You take a 6-pack cooler to church.
Your poppy's last words were "Hey ya'll look what I can do!"
You get pissed while mowing the grass.
You have ever peed in the sink because your moma was hogging the outhouse.
You start every story with "Y'all ain't gonna believe this!"
You reckon 'manual labor' is a Spanish ambassadar.
Your mutt's collar costs more than the clothes you are wearing.
You ever got a lap dance from your sister!
Your 2-year old got more teeth than you do.
You take a gunny sack to an all-you-can-eat bar.
G
Guest
Guest
How can you tell a redneck pirate from all the rest?
He's the one wearing a patch.....
over BOTH eyes.
What's the definition of a redneck virgin?
A 7 year old who can outrun her brothers.
He's the one wearing a patch.....
over BOTH eyes.
What's the definition of a redneck virgin?
A 7 year old who can outrun her brothers.
Similar threads
