Jesus Fucking Christ

[Rubyfruit]

Okay, I've got two kids who've had it coming out both ends for the last five days and now my fucking dog is throwing up?

And, I'm out of Xanax.

And, I need to get fucked.

/end rant

 

[sunstruck]

Ick. What's the cause?

 

[Ham Murabi]

Judging by the week you've had, I'd say you've already been fucked.

 

[Guru]

 

[Rubyfruit]

Exactly, Ham.

Just some icky virus, Sunny.

 

[roxanne69]

*passes rubyfruit a fresh bottle of xanax* care for a party favour?

 

[Nora]

Dump 'em all on the grandparents and come out to visit me. *nodsnods*


Or just blame the dog. He gets blamed for everything anyway.

 

[MsMuffet]

Hiya Ruby!

No I do not envy you... hope everyone dries up soon... Lord knows.. you'll be next!

Crossing my fingers for that NOT to happen, tho!

 

[Ham Murabi]

Too bad the dog is sick too. My experience with dogs is that they will generally eat anything, and you could use Fido to help clean up after the kids.

 

[Bob_Bytchin]

Sorry to hear about that Ruby....as they say, when it rains, it pours. ICK.

Hope things get better soon

 

[#1tankcomander]

Okay, I've got two kids who've had it coming out both ends for the last five days and now my fucking dog is throwing up?

And, I'm out of Xanax.

And, I need to get fucked.

/end rant

I order you to have a wild sexual experience and forget your woes for at least an hour or two!

 

[A Desert Rose]

Because we both love Tony....

this is for you, Ruby. ~smile~

 

[Rubyfruit]

~swoons~ Thank you ADR. God he gets me hot.

Ham, I like the way you think. Welcome to Lit.

Thanks for your kind thoughts everybody, but they mean little without the offer of a nanny and a plane ticket out of here for a week, preferably to a remote, tropical island with round-the-clock servants and insatiable cabana boys.

 

[Calamity Jane]

Will you stop and pick me up on your way to that island?

My 2 year old is asleep on the couch with a temp of 101 and an earache.

 

[Rubyfruit]

Absolutely, PCG. I'm flying on a private jet, so making stops shouldn't be a problem.

 

[phrodeau]

A nanny for Rubyfruit:

 

[Lancecastor]

I need to get fucked.

Ick. What's the cause?

I'm guessing she's fresh out of penis, genius.


L

 

[Rubyfruit]

~laughing~

Exactly, Lance.

When I cruised my local grocery store today, I was crushed when I came upon the "Out of Stock" sticker next to the empty penii shelf.

 

[teddybear4play]

Okay, I've got two kids who've had it coming out both ends for the last five days and now my fucking dog is throwing up?

And, I'm out of Xanax.

And, I need to get fucked.

/end rant

Do you really think you can have sex with two kids and a dog puking and pooping all over the place?

Well . . . okay. But I get to use your slippers if I need to go to the kitchen to make a sammich.

TB4p

 

[kotori]

that used to be my favorite curse, but i've shortened it now to just "jesus fuck."

 

[Rubyfruit]

TB, you're talking to a woman who figured out she could put her first infant in a door swing and grab a quickie. Furthermore, I can send the kids upstairs to look for sippy cups to put in the sink and fit in at least one orgasm in the ensuing 2 mintues of peace.

Kotori, don't you feel you're missing something without the Christ in your profanity?

 

[Silverlily]

Re: Re: Jesus Fucking Christ

that used to be my favorite curse, but i've shortened it now to just "jesus fuck."

Oh, but it has so much more impact when you use the whole thing. Kind of like using first, middle, and last names when one's child is in trouble.

 

[kotori]

Kotori, don't you feel you're missing something without the Christ in your profanity?

Umm. Not really. You know what the shortest verse in the bible is? I think the number is like John 11:35 (i grew up catholic, so bible quoting wasn't a big thing with us--that's why we hire a pope): "Jesus wept." It's sort of in that economics of linguistic-style mode.

 

[teddybear4play]

TB, you're talking to a woman who figured out she could put her first infant in a door swing and grab a quickie. Furthermore, I can send the kids upstairs to look for sippy cups to put in the sink and fit in at least one orgasm in the ensuing 2 mintues of peace.

OK, I'm convinced.

I'm still going to need your slippers, though.

TB4p

 

[Rambling Rose]

~laughing~

Exactly, Lance.

When I cruised my local grocery store today, I was crushed when I came upon the "Out of Stock" sticker next to the empty penii shelf.

I'm sorry, hon. There were tornados here...I had to stock up!