I'V had sex but never love

[OUTSIDER]

Tell me what is sex and what is love and can one lead to the other

 

[Patryn]

I think you've got greater issues than those 2 simple questions. Love is something different for everyone. You've obviously never been in it, or you would know.

Yes, love can, and often should, lead to sex. Sex, I suppose can lead to love, though it's been my experience that the former occurs far, far more.

 

[MADDOG]

I don't really have much experience, but I would say that sex can lead to love - provided that you go into sex willing to find love. If it's just about getting off, I would say that's all it would ever be, and I could be wrong, but I would think that the motivation for the sex would have to be more than just physical attraction, or else that will be the tone for the rest of the relationship. If neither of you can talk with each other - really talk - and all you see in each other at first is a pleasure vehicle, then love may be hard to find from that.

MADDOG

 

[OUTSIDER]

I have had sex but always found it spiritualy unfulfilling, am I alone on this one.

 

[MistressSin]

I have had sex but always found it spiritualy unfulfilling, am I alone on this one.

why is it I always end up quoting you? I find most sex unfulfilling...untill lately! I wish I had an answer for you but this is something you need to figure out on your own.

 

[Savage Kitten]

i had love... when i really didn't know or understand what sex was about.... and it didn't last

i've had sex... and i sometimes regret (and sometimes i don't regret) that love does not play a role

i have to believe though... that there is a possiblitiy for love and sex to coincide together in a relationship... as equals .. i don't think you should have to sacrifice one to have the other... and i don't think anyone should give up... or even settle.. until they find that balance

 

[CreamyLady]

Love can occur without sex, without any possibility of sex, and it is wonderful -- joyful, wild, intense, tender, painful; the trip of a lifetime, I wouldn't miss it for the world, even the pain of it.

When it does lead to sex, the sex is all of the above as well as fulfilling on a level that makes anything else seem a lot like masturbation.

Sex without love can be physically gratifying, but not on a regular basis. One can truly come to despise a partner who does nothing but provide a physical release.

I don't know if this helps, but I'm going to go off and have a wonderful cry and some chocolate right now. I'm enjoying the pain.

 

[April]

I hope someday to have both in equal measure. The balance that Savage Kitten wrote about. So far, I have not been able to find the balance. I have love, but not much sex. My fault. I have had the sex, and love on my part, but not on his. This made the relationship lopsided and painful. I have "issues" with sex. Maybe it's only that the physical attraction is no longer there. I don't know what to do about it. Well, really, I know. I just don't want to. I'm afraid. Oh well, it could be worse, you know.

 

[Gingersnap]

Most people mistake infatuation with "Love". Love is what comes after the roller coaster isn't free falling you thru emotions.
For me it is based on a sincere appreciation of that person. It is what is in their eyes when you look into them. I came to love someone based on the kindness and wonderful absurdity of his thoughts. The fact that he is creative, gentle and honest helps too. He shares the traits of the man who taught me what it means to love. Lessons learned young stay in your heart. I see the wonder in him touching the wonder in me. It can leave you shaken and the world around you brighter and a inanely silly smile of your face. It's the peace I feel in my soul and the trust I have in him.

 

[Dixon Carter Lee]

Damn it, Ginger, I said "No kiss and tell!"

I agree with her. Too many people confuse infatutation and lust for something more long term, like love. Love requires loving a person all the time, not just when you're horny or impressed, but also when you don't very much like the person. Love's a commitment that says, "I'll stick around, even on those days you royally tick me off."

 

[OUTSIDER]

Creamy Lady and Mistress sin thank you .
sex without love is the fastest way to end up despising yourself I'v ever found.