Is "too much love" a thing?

[12356416514a]

I have to write a story and I want to keep it at least somewhat realistic...

So I do this thing with a friend were we write stories for each other. We give each other a general idea and then write the story. For example my friend told me to write a story about a couple. Both have mutual feelings for each other, but neither of them realizes that and they are both too shy to ask each other out. But then when they do end up together it's too much for them to handle and they break up before anything sexual happens.

Now I don't want you guys to write this for me, I just need some general ideas because I have NO clue what it's like to love a person so much that you can't do anything sexual with them. My friend is female, so maybe some female insight can help? Because I am not really a romantic person or anything.

 

[Brutal_One]

Interesting dilemma

Hello, it’s an interesting idea you represent. Can you love someone too much? There is a fear for a lot of people or maybe an insecurity is a better word to open yourself up to love someone. Most decent relationships that have a future start off with a friendship. A respect for each other. Shared ideas and hobbies and interests.

That may be the start of a story idea. The what if he/she does not like X, in particular if X that someone likes a lot. X may be an idea or philosophy a person has. Most people have a world view and resonate with those people that share those views. The two peas in a pod idea. You could start with that.

The other thing is the fear of sex itself, not so much the act but if it will change the relationship and maybe not for the better. Maybe the idea of “friends with benefits” where the danger is for one or the other it goes beyond the no strings, a bit of fun for one but deeper feelings from the other. It’s maybe similar to the mistress idea. “When are you going to leave your wife for me?”. It’s also why infidelity hurts.

Hopefully some ideas to work from.

Brutal One

 

[UsuallyPresent]

IMO, you're not talking about 'loving too much' here - that heads off into obsession and the whole Fatal Instinct thing, IMO. Instead your scenario seems to me to be more about two shy people getting an opportunity to connect, but neither can overcome their shyness.

Sad situation, lots of RL examples, especially among the young and insecure. (IMO still, 'course). While this may be an early romance storyline, I'm not sure where it'd best fit here on Lit - IE, what category. . .

 

[NotWise]

The setup seems to require an underlying conflict. There has to be something in their background that makes it impossible for one or both of them to experience intimacy: childhood trauma or abuse, some deeply held secret that they're afraid they'd share, or some serious problem in the way they perceive their bodies. There could be quite a few possibilities.

 

[HappySpouse]

Both have mutual feelings for each other, but neither of them realizes that and they are both too shy to ask each other out. But then when they do end up together it's too much for them to handle and they break up before anything sexual happens.

People called me an my wife a couple for months before we started dating. It was just that obvious that it would happen. She eventually asked me out. Not only was I intimidated by the idea of becoming a couple, but also three (THREE!) of my friends had individually expressed interest in her and one had unsuccessfully asked her out. So, it just all seemed so complicated.

After she asked me, it was terrifying. We both knew that this was it. This was the one. There was more than a sense of starting a relationship, it felt like we were starting our lives with each other. Also, a lot of people were waaaayyyy into our relationship (they felt like we were some storybook couple), and we felt like were figuring things out in a fishbowl.

I can easily see how that could have overwhelmed us to the point of blowing the whole thing up. I'm sure it's happened to others. Also, someone mentioned above giving a reason why they would be afraid. I say why wouldn't a person be afraid, you let someone into your heart you give them limitless power to hurt you if that's what they decide to do. It's scary.

 

[12356416514a]

I want to thank you all for your replies, you helped me a lot here. I didn't mention this in my first post, but me and my friend are german, and we write our stories in german. You can probably tell that my english isn't that good

I got until saturday night to finish this.

Anyway, my current idea is that [Guy] and [Girl] have a crush on each other. But since they are too shy to admit it, they tease and bully each other. They are having a house party with close friends. They tease each other and it's obvious to everyone but them that they like each other. At some point their friends have enough and they tell them in a berating way to stop the fighting and make love already. They look the two into one of the bedrooms and leave them alone. And now I was thinking that they slowly strip each other out of their clothes, not believing that they are finally together. But when they are down to their underwear they get performance anxiety.

The shyness kicks in and neither of them can overcome it, so they joke about how funny it is that they "tricked" the others into thinking they liked each other while they get dressed again and escape from the window.

Or some shit like that. Is this somewhat realistic? I do know my friend and I can imagine her liking this, since she is into cute stuff and not a very big fan of kinks and fetishes.

 

[AlexBailey]

Under your premise that friends were encouraging them; there is a lot of room for disconnect and unrealistic expectations.

Food for thought:


I once saw a bunch of lesbians get two friends together only to find out that one of them was not a lesbian.

I had a friend who'd had a rumor spread about him that he had a huge cock. He hooked up with one eager-beaver who was apparently disappointed with his less-than-average reality... it gave him a bit of a complex for a while.

There's the Movie/story 'Like Water for Chocolate' where frustrated love finally comes to fruition with deadly results when fantasy becomes reality.

Many undercurrents of mental illness can produce unattainable expectations. I have a beautiful ex-wife with some serious insecurities. She gets 'proactively upset' (my term) rather than be disappointed, thus destroying many good possibilities out of misplaced fear.

Peer pressure is a thing. I've been stuffed in a closet with a beautiful girl as a party game. We had nothing in common when we entered, but we decided to put on a ruse and make it look like we got into each other. We were never romantic in reality, but we started rumors and became good friends.

 

[Carnevil9]

Do you read Shakespeare? Your situation reminds me of Othello, who "loved not wisely, but too well," which didn't end well. You might as well get your inspiration from the best.