Is It Easier to Express Your Feelings...

[juicylips]

in writing than in speaking?

Do you find you say more when writing than looking at someone in the eye and saying what you are really feeling at the moment?

Do you write unsent letters?

Tell me.
jl

 

[calypso_21]

I do so much better in person. I'm the type that speaks not only with words but my entire body...hmm. It's the truth. Vocalizing for me is better...written words can never truly convey the feelings behind them. A look, a touch, the lilt in your voice...says it all.

 

[Bent]

I express myself better with my closest friends, otherwise Im better in writing.

 

[Raina]

Sometimes it is easier to write things out than to say them in person. However, it's harder to make yourself completely understood in writing. You miss out on things like voice inflection and body language.

If I feel really emotional about something, I may write it out in letter form first, just to get my thoughts organized, but I usually just use it as a sort of guide for the 'in person' conversation...just lining up what I want to say so that I'm not saying things in the heat of passion so to speak.

That being said, most of my unsent letters are really just the result of me procrastinating and not mailing them.

 

[Lost Cause]

Depends on the receiver...

If what I have to say is detailed, and the other person is very emotional, and I know I wouldn't get it all out with them, so I'll write my grievance.
If they're reasonable, I'd do it face to face.

I've used both methods with gfs in the past.

 

[scrymettet]

Express feelings ?

 

[juicylips]

Express feelings ?

Yes...expressing your feelings in either written form or with speech. Which is easier for you?

 

[Smiley777]

Sometimes it is easier to write things out than to say them in person. However, it's harder to make yourself completely understood in writing. You miss out on things like voice inflection and body language.

This is how I feel too.

I don't usually write unsent letters. I may take a break from a conversation to think, but will come back to it in a more organized or less...heated....manner.

 

[badasschick]

Sometimes words fly out of my mouth at times they don't. When I write I have more time to refine my thoughts and help them make more sense to whom ever is reading it, however abstract they may be. I think at times meaning is lost when the vocal inflections aren't there.

 

[Cheyenne]

I'm better at writing than speaking. I don't have unsent letters though. If I write them, I send them.

 

[juicylips]

I don't have unsent letters though. If I write them, I send them.

That doesn't surprise me in the least.

 

[Guest]

Sometimes words fly out of my mouth at times they don't. When I write I have more time to refine my thoughts and help them make more sense to whom ever is reading it, however abstract they may be. I think at times meaning is lost when the vocal inflections aren't there.

I agree fully. There are pros and cons to each.

 

[cybergirly]

It's easier to be completely honest with written words, and yet it often seems to be the easy way out.

I've been in relationships in the past where I couldn't vocalize my feelings so I'd write them down and leave them for him, but this wasn't a good relationship, we didn't have the communication that is needed for it to work.

If the person is important enough to me that I want them to understand my feelings, I need to be able to express those feelings to them personally. To be able to look into thier eyes, see thier body language, to know if they care enough to listen to what I'm saying, and to make sure that they understand.

 

[scrymettet]

Yes...expressing your feelings in either written form or with speech. Which is easier for you?

None. I do that only when cornered.

 

[Guest]

 

[BJ]

in writing than in speaking?

Do you find you say more when writing than looking at someone in the eye and saying what you are really feeling at the moment?

Do you write unsent letters?

Tell me.
jl

I feel that many times the stories posted here are very much like unsent letters. They seem at times to let the author say what he feels would be next to impossible to say to his wife, girlfriend or possibly his lover. I wouldn't classify it as a dirty secret, more like a release of pent-up emotions looking for some kind of release. For myself I find it easier to write the words than speak, but I would prefer to oral presentation than written since it is in many ways a more honest presentation.

 

[Lasher]

I dated a girl for a semester in college, then she graduated and we started corresponding. About 2 months in to our correpsondence she writes me something to the effect of "Ya know, you're much better in writing than you are in person."

This was at a time when I was constantly under the influence of various mind altering substances and I believed it to be one of the more expressive times in my life. Could be I just didn't know when to shut up and wasn't really saying anything, lol.

Anyways...

I "say" more when I'm writing. I'm more expressive in person, not necessarily verbally, but from what I've been told I'm one of those people with very easy to read facial expressions and body movements.

Where I have issues is in the gray areas - the telephone is a killer for me because I'm not an overly talkative person and you can't read facial expressions on a phone line. Some of the worst moments of my life have been trying to deal with relationship issues on the phone.

 

[juicylips]

Where I have issues is in the gray areas - the telephone is a killer for me because I'm not an overly talkative person and you can't read facial expressions on a phone line. Some of the worst moments of my life have been trying to deal with relationship issues on the phone.

So I guess phonesex is out of the question.

 

[Saint Valentine]

Real live conversation is so much better. So much more immediate, but I do find times that when I want to be "listened" to without being interupted, that a letter is an excellent communication tool.

 

[Lasher]

So I guess phonesex is out of the question.

That's really between you and your phone.

 

[juicylips]

Re: Re: Is It Easier to Express Your Feelings...

I feel that many times the stories posted here are very much like unsent letters. They seem at times to let the author say what he feels would be next to impossible to say to his wife, girlfriend or possibly his lover. I wouldn't classify it as a dirty secret, more like a release of pent-up emotions looking for some kind of release. For myself I find it easier to write the words than speak, but I would prefer to oral presentation than written since it is in many ways a more honest presentation.

You are getting my meaning exactly. There is a book called "Unsent Letters" by Lauren B. Smith that suggests writing these kinds of letters to yourself and others as a way of dealing with emotions you have buried or feel unable to deal with face to face. I've only read a portion of the book, but it's fascinating.

 

[juicylips]

That's really between you and your phone.

Touche'

 

[Agent99]

The nice thing about a bulletin board (when used as intended) is that you have the luxury of time to organize your thoughts before posting. (Unlike chat where speed is the key)

I am expressive, emotive and tactile in person-to person conversations. I speak with my hands. I touch others as a way of speaking in italics or when I want to make a point.

However, speaking brings with it a sense of immediacy. Many times we have experienced brain farts where we speak without thinking. Once it is 'out there' it is difficult to backtrack and minimize any damage.

When writing, we are afforded the opportunity to draft comments. Read them and give them the once over before we submit. Not just for typing or spelling errors, but for content as well. But, it has its downside as well.

Writing letters or here in the Forum leaves lots of room for misinterpretation. We cannot see facial expressions. Cannot hear inflections in the voice. Cannot see if there is eye contact. We lose a great deal of our senses and abilities to discern truth and sincerity.

Six to one, half a dozen to the other. Of course, I don't think there is a room big enough for all Literotica to meet, so this is probably the best way for us all to express ourselves.

 

[Saint Valentine]

Re: Re: Re: Is It Easier to Express Your Feelings...

You are getting my meaning exactly. There is a book called "Unsent Letters" by Lauren B. Smith that suggests writing these kinds of letters to yourself and others as a way of dealing with emotions you have buried or feel unable to deal with face to face. I've only read a portion of the book, but it's fascinating.

I must admit I have written a couple of "Letters She'll Never See" in my life.



Explain to me this sex with your phone business.

 

[juicylips]

Re: Re: Re: Re: Is It Easier to Express Your Feelings...

Explain to me this sex with your phone business.

Do you want me to draw pictures or just do a live demonstration?