Is boring Sex better than no Sex?

[bigpecker7]

Since my relationship with my SO now is mostly boring sex, no matter how much I ask to try and spice it up, every few weeks, I found myself asking should I even bother. So my question to all the Lit listers, Is boring sex, no foreplay, no spice, just right to it every few weeks better than no sex at all!

 

[FGB]

Until it gets to the point that they start criticizing every sexual move and action.

So right in the middle of fucking I decided, Oh HELL NO!

It's just not worth it!

Four years later we divorced...Six years later I found someone that understood that sex is a two person event!

 

[ian370]

Life is too short to be boring.

 

[bigpecker7]

Life is too short to be boring.

Exactly, boring sucks, but do needs take over

 

[ian370]

Exactly, boring sucks, but do needs take over

Some needs are simply best when shared.

If this is not possible without boring, I'll always choose to excite myself.

Life is too short to be bored also.

Even when lost within chosen solitude, it will never be unnecessary boredom.

 

[oneblueye]

hey...

anytime someone wants to 'contract out' their times of boring sex and you're within my two hour drive time, I welcome you to contact me.

 

[Sigmund7]

Since menopause, my wife has lost the ability to orgasm as well as her interest in sex. She says it still feels good even if she doesn't have an orgasm and we usually have a go on Saturday or Sunday morning. She doesn't seem to really be interested, but performs out of a sense of obligation to our 40 years together. It's always the same, always in the morning and we rarely have any sexual contact outside those bounds. I don't know that I would call our sex boring, but it certainly has lost things over the years. Is it better than no sex? A resounding yes.

 

[vizio]

I would say yes considering the worst sex i ever had was still pretty good

 

[69plus1]

depends

Yes something is better than nothing, but if all there was is the boring stuff be sure I would be getting myself off some other time.

 

[Enchanted_DreamFairy218]

Since my relationship with my SO now is mostly boring sex, no matter how much I ask to try and spice it up, every few weeks, I found myself asking should I even bother. So my question to all the Lit listers, Is boring sex, no foreplay, no spice, just right to it every few weeks better than no sex at all!

I would rather have no sex at all, than boring sex. Sex should be an effort on both parties and both parties should be able to enjoy one another and be able to spice it up. If it seems one sided, I would rather not have sex at all because it would just end up hurting me in the end.

 

[Erodicus]

I'm happy to take it anyway it cums.

 

[Stillrandy]

I would rather have no sex at all, than boring sex. Sex should be an effort on both parties and both parties should be able to enjoy one another and be able to spice it up. If it seems one sided, I would rather not have sex at all because it would just end up hurting me in the end.

I can agree with the sense of what you wrote. However, eventually, the 'no sex' route can (will?) cause as much hurt as the one-sided or boring route. Sooner or later the inherent emotional and sexual needs of at least one of the partners will seek an outlet in some other, probably less healthy, way. At least so it seems to me. I have some experience in this matter, sad to say.

 

[EctoJohn]

As a person that gets no action I can say "Yes".
I'd rather have boring sex than no sex.

Then again, it's been so long for me, I'd have to ask "What the hell is boring sex?"

 

[youneedatonguelashing]

Right now i am grateful and frankly a little surprised to have had boring sex twice this month. Dont know what else has got into her, but at least i did.

 

[StrongMaster7]

Speaking as someone who has been on the same 'sex diet' for over 30 years, boring sex is way better than no sex. I love to touch my wife's body and feel her against me. It's great. Do I wish she would suggest something new? Of course. But compared to living like a prisoner, even boring sex is better than none.

SAT question: Poor food is to no food as boring sex is to _____.

It's a) no sex.

I use porn and fantasy and masturbation the other six days a week (and generally the seventh day too). That's when I get my variety, although it is 'virtual'. I love my wife. She simply has much less sex drive and less interest in sex than I do. It's who she is. If the situation was reversed, I'd appreciate her not giving up on me. She's wonderful in every other way.

No offense to the guys who prefer celibacy.

 

[NorthernVAM]

Since my relationship with my SO now is mostly boring sex, no matter how much I ask to try and spice it up, every few weeks, I found myself asking should I even bother. So my question to all the Lit listers, Is boring sex, no foreplay, no spice, just right to it every few weeks better than no sex at all!

I honestly believe that his is a matter of individual compatibility resulting from the fact that we are all biologically different with respect to our wants, desires, and needs. For the general human population, my impression is that "novelty" is generally a "turn on" for both sexes, and that after a few years of sex with the same partner, the frequency / interest drops off unless you really "work" at it, which makes it kind of a chore for a lot of folks.

Part of the problem is also that when you marry someone and choose them as a life partner, there are lots of compatibility "trades" that you have to make. Is it better to have someone whom you can't relate to on interpersonal matters, but satisfies all your sexual needs? Or is it better to have someone who you can get along with, cohabit with peacefully, enjoy their company most of the time, but have boring sex with them? I think it's an individual choice for the most part, and I also think the choices aren't always conscious ones -- I would say we often choose "life" partners based upon our subconscious needs, ones that we aren't fully aware of, and ones that won't necessarily lead to individual happiness in the long run.

Given all of that -- I think it's basically a crap shoot. Some of us are lucky, some of us aren't, and many of us are somewhere in between, where we were lucky enough not to be miserable or unsatisfied with our choice of life partner.

 

[Wonderer67]

I was in a mostly sexless marriage for about 10 years. (As soon as our first child was born, the sex pretty much stopped.) I will say that boring sex would have been far more preferred than no sex.

50% of something is better than 100% of nothing.

Things are very different now, but I can relate to people who post about sexless/loveless relationship. I was there.

 

[masterslave00]

Better something than nothing...

 

[ChefMario77]

anytime someone wants to 'contract out' their times of boring sex and you're within my two hour drive time, I welcome you to contact me.

And where are you? Asking for a friend...

 

[ChefMario77]

19 years. Always been boring sex, save for 2 instances.


We've had sex 6x this year. At this point, jerking off is preferable...


Hence why I'm looking for a girlfriend and/or boyfriend.

 

[colddiesel]

Since my relationship with my SO now is mostly boring sex, no matter how much I ask to try and spice it up, every few weeks, I found myself asking should I even bother. So my question to all the Lit listers, Is boring sex, no foreplay, no spice, just right to it every few weeks better than no sex at all!

So what are you doing for her? not just relying on your "Big Pecker" ?

 

[Acktion]

After more than a few false starts, I was lucky enough to find the woman who could keep up with me. We got married. And the story is supposed to go "and they lived happily ever after."

Happily ever after is just a story that hasn't reached its natural end.

I'm no saint. Nor do I pretend to be. Not proud of the three times I "strayed" even if she might have, as I suspect, set those instances up. Don't really know, never asked while she was alive. Too chicken shit, maybe.

No, I'm no angel.

But, when it came down to it, I loved my late wife dearly. And when her disability had her bedridden and intimacy was a thing of the past since only three places on her body weren't numb or painful, I stayed right here beside her all the way to her death. Going without anything beyond masturbation for years at the end. Something I wouldn't have thought I would be capable of early on when we would fuck for seventy-two hours straight a few times per year. (Usually New Year, my birthday, and her birthday.)

However, as a bright young widow helped me to understand, "We aren't the ones who died."

Oh, I paid lip service to "not going through that again, nor putting someone else through it." But, the fact of the matter is...

Look, my only experience with "bad sex" was a long time ago when she absolutely did not want me cumming in her, on her, or even in the same room with her. That? Fuck no. I'm out.

But, I've never experienced "boring sex." Not even sure what that would look like. Maybe I've just been fortunate that my lovers have always been kinked or fetished in some way?

However, when you love someone, really love someone, I think you can put up with a lot. It's just my personal opinion, but I've always thought that's what love is, being able to put up with their shit and still wanting them around. And if that "shit" is being either unwilling or unable to participate in physical intimacy in the form of sex at all or just the kinkier forms, then I think it's something only the person involved can answer whether the rest is worth putting up with that.

 

[Mtnmike]

For years I complained how boring our sex life was, now been sexless 13 years, wish I'd kept my mouth shut !!!

 

[Drinkmein]

Speaking as someone who has been on the same 'sex diet' for over 30 years, boring sex is way better than no sex. I love to touch my wife's body and feel her against me. It's great. Do I wish she would suggest something new? Of course. But compared to living like a prisoner, even boring sex is better than none.

SAT question: Poor food is to no food as boring sex is to _____.

It's a) no sex.

I use porn and fantasy and masturbation the other six days a week (and generally the seventh day too). That's when I get my variety, although it is 'virtual'. I love my wife. She simply has much less sex drive and less interest in sex than I do. It's who she is. If the situation was reversed, I'd appreciate her not giving up on me. She's wonderful in every other way.

No offense to the guys who prefer celibacy.

I love this response.

 

[mortis]

It’s been a very strange year I confronted her about it always being the same…

She gets a little drunk, puts on Coldplay grabs a small vibe in her clit, I get to ride for a few minutes maybe doggie style and it’s over… no oral for me she enjoys oral but won’t move that vibe away from her clit.

She now acts like I’m some type of pervert because I want her to try something different. Maybe just mutual masturbation or just oral.

I do understand her orgasm is far more elusive and she found something that works but it is so boring.