Is bisexuality real?

[sexplorer35]

I was writing in another thread and thought of something that a friend said that I think makes an interesting topic:

"There's no such thing as bisexuality. You're either gay or straight. It's just that if you get horny enough, you'll try anything."

What do you think?

 

[Ms_Lilith]

I think that's insulting. That insinuates that people who are bi are only in it for the sex, rather than for the opportunity to fall in love with either gender.

I am bisexual. I've slept with men and women. But more importantly, I've LOVED both men and women. Bisexuality is like being gay or straight in that it's not just about the sex.. it's about being open to relationships... and in the case of a bisexual person, they are open to relationships with both men and women.

I think your friend needs to open his or her mind just a little, and realize that women who fuck around with other women (I'm assuming this was the situation he was talking about, as it's usually the case) CAN be in it for more than sex.

 

[Guest]

I think that's insulting. That insinuates that people who are bi are only in it for the sex, rather than for the opportunity to fall in love with either gender.

I am bisexual. I've slept with men and women. But more importantly, I've LOVED both men and women. Bisexuality is like being gay or straight in that it's not just about the sex.. it's about being open to relationships... and in the case of a bisexual person, they are open to relationships with both men and women.

I think your friend needs to open his or her mind just a little, and realize that women who fuck around with other women (I'm assuming this was the situation he was talking about, as it's usually the case) CAN be in it for more than sex.

Applauds

 

[PinkOrchid]

 

[dancinvixen]

I think that's insulting. That insinuates that people who are bi are only in it for the sex, rather than for the opportunity to fall in love with either gender.

I am bisexual. I've slept with men and women. But more importantly, I've LOVED both men and women. Bisexuality is like being gay or straight in that it's not just about the sex.. it's about being open to relationships... and in the case of a bisexual person, they are open to relationships with both men and women.

I think your friend needs to open his or her mind just a little, and realize that women who fuck around with other women (I'm assuming this was the situation he was talking about, as it's usually the case) CAN be in it for more than sex.

Vixenshe, I LOVE YOUR ANSWER!!!!!!!!!!!!!! That statement about us bisexuals being bi only for the sex, have never had the opportunity to have their hearts broken by men AND women. I am a bisexual woman who loves men and women. I am currently in love with, and married to my wonderful husband, and he loves, that I love both genders. Not because it means he gets free threesomes, but because it makes me happy. And he likes seeing me happy.

 

[sexplorer35]

Boy, how do I retract a question?! I'm sorry to have insulted so many! I do appreciate the opportunity to ask a question and get an answer. I don't really want to retract the question, because asking such questions is good for understanding. I have learned something from each of you. And isn't that what this site is about ... learning, gaining an understanding about a variety of topics?
Still, there was no intent to demean or insult. Again, sorry and thanks for your answers.

 

[Ms_Lilith]

you said your FRIEND said that quote... so tell your friend that he/she doesn't know what they're talking about.

It's fine that you ask the question, it's just insulting that someone would say something like your friend did. Obviously, he/she is a horny toad, and probably wanting some same-sex action, but too afraid to admit it.

 

[apexpark]

i think its more of an issue of overcoming your true animal instincts and becoming more attracted to the mind rather than the body.

 

[Avery_Chisholm]

AMEN, WELL SAID

 

[Guest]

Sexuality is a behavior, and as such has a variety of manifesations. It's not cut-and-dried like sex

I concur with PO. Yes, bisexuality is real but it seems more common with women than with men.

 

[Image]

We are all bi-sexual... each of us contains the seed (anima or animus) within of the opposite gender... Some of us are just more open to accepting that integration.

And it feels so good to not fight it

 

[PinkOrchid]

 

[alltherage]

I am bi and often horny. I think I would often be horny if I were straight or Lesbian. Seems a silly argument to me.

 

[Image]

I'm wondering if this isn't just a product of our society. If you look at other cultures where male bisexuality is more accepted, it is more prevalent.

I've spoken to a number of male friends who are in touch with their sexuality and there's often at least a curiosity there. What seems to hold them back is the stigma of male homosexuality in our society and how that was beaten into their psyches as they were growing up. (What's the worst thing you'll hear boys and young men calling each other: homo, bitch, woman, etc.)

Slightly OT: I find it somewhat erotic to hear a man admit he wants or has thought about a man-man encounter. I'm not sure exactly why, but I think part of it has to do with being turned on by how comfortable he is with his sexuality and his willingness to share such an intimate thought with me. And it would be HOT, HOT, HOT to watch.

That willingness to share those intimacies are what turns me on the most. I agree... If he is that comfortable in his own skin the possibilities are endless.. and that makes for the hottest sex... because afterall, the most erotic encounters are in the mind!

 

[sheath]

I think that's insulting. That insinuates that people who are bi are only in it for the sex, rather than for the opportunity to fall in love with either gender.

I am bisexual. I've slept with men and women. But more importantly, I've LOVED both men and women. Bisexuality is like being gay or straight in that it's not just about the sex.. it's about being open to relationships... and in the case of a bisexual person, they are open to relationships with both men and women.

I think your friend needs to open his or her mind just a little, and realize that women who fuck around with other women (I'm assuming this was the situation he was talking about, as it's usually the case) CAN be in it for more than sex.

Vixenshe, My official hero of the week.

S.

 

[Bandit58]

Slightly OT: I find it somewhat erotic to hear a man admit he wants or has thought about a man-man encounter. I'm not sure exactly why, but I think part of it has to do with being turned on by how comfortable he is with his sexuality and his willingness to share such an intimate thought with me. And it would be HOT, HOT, HOT to watch.

I was with someone the other night, a guy who I've known since we were kids, and he told me he'd been with a man once.....I was with a woman for the first time a couple of weeks ago. Made our encounter that much more intimate, knowing those things about each other And he was definitely comfortable with his sexuality.........

I am in love with a man, but being attracted to women is part of who I am, and anyone who I'm going to have a relationship with will be made aware of that. I've had enough of hiding......

 

[dollface007]

I like to think about sexual preference as a spectrum with exclusive attraction to men on one end, exclusive attraction to women on the other end, and a wide range of possibilities in the middle. I think people can fall anywhere in between. I happen to fall closer to the "attracted to men" side, but i wouldn't place myself in the far extreme either. Does this make me bisexual? Who knows. Do you have to act on attraction to both sexes to be bisexual? Who knows. Remember, these are just words and labels that we place on phenomena to make them more understandable, but our words have their limits. Sexuality is so diverse and nuanced that you could fill an entire library trying to explain it.

 

[Guest]

What seems to hold them back is the stigma of male homosexuality in our society and how that was beaten into their psyches as they were growing up. (What's the worst thing you'll hear boys and young men calling each other: homo, bitch, woman, etc.)

PO, you are dead balls on right. I am sure in countries such as Sweden, there is no stigma for males who wish to experiment w/ other males. America has too many taboos.

 

[Guest]

I think that's insulting. That insinuates that people who are bi are only in it for the sex, rather than for the opportunity to fall in love with either gender.

I am bisexual. I've slept with men and women. But more importantly, I've LOVED both men and women. Bisexuality is like being gay or straight in that it's not just about the sex.. it's about being open to relationships... and in the case of a bisexual person, they are open to relationships with both men and women.

I think your friend needs to open his or her mind just a little, and realize that women who fuck around with other women (I'm assuming this was the situation he was talking about, as it's usually the case) CAN be in it for more than sex.

My wife agrees with you Vix 100%. For all those who think being bi is not right, can't see past thier fucking nose!!!!!!!1

 

[Sabledrake]

Yes, bisexuality is real but it seems more common with women than with men.

Not 'common,' but it does certainly seem to be more popular and socially acceptable for women.

Sabledrake

 

[lorddragonwolf]

I think that's insulting. That insinuates that people who are bi are only in it for the sex, rather than for the opportunity to fall in love with either gender.

I am bisexual. I've slept with men and women. But more importantly, I've LOVED both men and women. Bisexuality is like being gay or straight in that it's not just about the sex.. it's about being open to relationships... and in the case of a bisexual person, they are open to relationships with both men and women.

I think your friend needs to open his or her mind just a little, and realize that women who fuck around with other women (I'm assuming this was the situation he was talking about, as it's usually the case) CAN be in it for more than sex.

agrees

 

[jenlovesamy]

Someone said it earlier and I agree that I think everyone is born bisexual and society places its choices on you. The religious right says that you should be heterosexual because that is how the species is propogated but where has that gotten us exactly? Look at the rampant overpopulation today. World hunger, even in the good ole U.S.A., and we should just keep having sex to create more babies, right? Not to actually enjoy ourselves, like that post on the GB about the evils of masturbation and how it leads to depression, why can't we have orgasms for pleasure?

Wait, where was I going with this? hehe...

 

[homunculus]

A couple of reactions: bisexuality is just a word, and its history is fairly recent. Words that start to assume the feel of 'natural' categories can be a problem--we look for hardwiring for inclinations that are probably more nuanced and creative than we know...So, it isn't nec. insulting to suggest that men need to be very horny and frustrated to try alternative forms of sexual expression. I think it's probably true for all but a very few men. That doesn't mean that once the barrier has been broken (same sex stigma) that a man won't get close to the man he has slept with.
That said, I think it's true that bi inclinations, if the phrase must be used, are far more common among women than men. As evidence, and maybe this isn't good evidence, but...I've never seen evidence of arousal in a locker room, and that would be evident in men. Give me a long look into a women's locker room, and you'd see the evidence...

 

[jenlovesamy]

You haven't seen evidence in a locker room because your fathers have beaten it into you, sometimes literally, that "it isn't right" to want to fuck your fellow man. But think about this for a minute. Some people think that sexuality is biological, that you're either born gay or straight. A friend of mine is gay. We took him to a strip club and got him a lap dance because he told us he knew he would get no reaction, well, guess what? He got as big a hard on as he would have had he been straight. It's a mental choice, not a biological one, of that, I am sure. And I also do believe that if our society was not so puritanical in our views about sex then more people wouldn't be as crazy about it as we are.

 

[PinkOrchid]