Inspired: orgasm denial?

[9to5]

But I also have found out on my female partner.
Too many can be just as painfull. So to string her out she will lose interest.
but to keep her cumming gets it so sensitive I jst have to tap it to drive her nuts

 

[rida]

Another one for the "deny too long and I'll lose interest".

....
The sort of denial that you bring me close to orgasm over and over, for a long period of time, but never letting me have it? That gets my body to shut down the ability to orgasm.
....

That has happened here as well. The first time or two it was very intensely pleasurable albeit frustrating. And when he let me finally cum (few days later) it took sometime to get me to orgasm, but I didn't think much of it. It has happened sometimes that no matter what you do I don't cum. But when he tried to do it again, not only I was not reaching any where near the peak of excitement, my body would start to get excited and than shut down, as if knowing that release was not coming, it was making sure not to get frustrated either.

On the other hand, if you bring me to the edge, and deny or force me to cum at random (more control than flat out denial), you have my body totally focused on any slight touch.

It is a fine balance and trial and errors to get your pyl's body to react the way the PYL wishes.

 

[PassionateStars]

Rida

Lovley node rida

 

[oysterman]

I do like to use orgasm denial. I have found though that there is a fine line. If I bring my sub to the brink of orgasm without letting her orgasm to many times when I do finally allow her to orgasm it is difficult for her to orgasm. On the other hand if I simply just let her get warmed up a few times, I find that she becomes more submissive to me and will do everything she can to try to please me so that I will give her permission to orgasm.

 

[Homburg]

I do like to use orgasm denial. I have found though that there is a fine line. If I bring my sub to the brink of orgasm without letting her orgasm to many times when I do finally allow her to orgasm it is difficult for her to orgasm. On the other hand if I simply just let her get warmed up a few times, I find that she becomes more submissive to me and will do everything she can to try to please me so that I will give her permission to orgasm.

I have never understood this. Maybe it is just the partners I've had, but "becomes more submissive to me" is not an experience I've had. When my hand is in her hair, her face pressed into the floor, and her ass in the air, there is no "more submissive to me".

Honestly, it is not something I get. I treat every girl the same way. "You're here because you can't see any other way to live your life other than kneeling at my feet. If you decide not to comply, you can get up and walk any time you want." Never had a lick of issue vis a vis submissive or not. Still, maybe it is the selection process. I'll play with submissives, but I only keep slaves *shrug*

NOTE: I'm not disrespecting anyone that has had, and enjoyed this experience. Just commenting that it is legitimately foreign to me.

 

[ataxia.girl]

my idea, however, is to use the bottom's pleasure, e.g. sexual, as a 'carrot.' if she wants to come, she will present her mouth as a hole for spit, lick feet, or whatever.

when on the bottom, too, there's a fine helpless feeling from knowing the top controls the pleasures, the primal rewards that shape behavior in any desired way.

i do not see being allowed to cum as ever being "carrot" enough to get me to do anything. i'm far too into denying and punishing myself. In fact once given "permission" to cum its pretty much certain i won't be able to. i have been given permission right on the brink of orgasm and not been able to. i can sometimes cum with a partner i have been with a LONG time if i wait to ask to cum until orgasm is basically imminent and i'm going to cum whether its granted or not (it always is) but there isn't really even an illusion of control there, i just can't cum without asking (when masturbating i have to fantasize about asking).

Praise is really the only carrot i need to get me to do something voluntarily as long as i perceive power has adequately exchanged.

I have never understood this. Maybe it is just the partners I've had, but "becomes more submissive to me" is not an experience I've had. When my hand is in her hair, her face pressed into the floor, and her ass in the air, there is no "more submissive to me".

i'm with Homburg on this one. The Top makes me feel submissive by his demeanor and actions NOT by giving me pleasure. i am not submissive to my magic wand i kind of get the "more submissive" thing just because i do feel gradations of submissiveness, that isn't to say what i'm feeling makes much difference to the Top as long as all my holes are just as available.

i am most comfortable if pleasure given me is done so in the context of " I am making you wet for Me" rather than to give me some type of reward. An orgasm is not the reward i want or care about. Yes i need to have them occasionally to stay sane but i don't need them from my Top, i need something else entirely from Him.

i would consider orgasming for my Top regularly at his direction one of the ultimate manifestations of surrender only because it has historically been so difficult for me. It would not make me feel more submissive as the submission and then surrender would already have had to occur for it to even be possible and would certainly only happen with a Top that was a very skillful Dominant, not one who just knows how to accept submission which is not the same thing.

 

[chatbug]

I want a girlfriend / significant other that enjoys controlling my orgasms. For me, orgasm control is not something I'm interested in on its own. I'm not looking for a key holder. I'm looking for a relationship that includes orgasm control.

I think I'm unusual that I'm not interested in a dominant / submissive dynamic. I don't want to be her servant. I just want orgasm control as a part of our sexuality.

I'm interested in pleasuring her, seeing her happy. I'm not interested in intercourse. I do want to orgasm on occasion. As others have said, limiting my orgasms would make them more intense.

Ideally, she'd be happy having daily multiple orgasms, and I'd be happy having bi-weekly orgasms.

 

[her_soffie]

My Domme uses it as a means to focus me on my service to her. It is very effective in increasing my ardor at whatever task she has me performing......and sometimes she even allows me to bring myself off if she is in a good mood and i have performed up to the standard she was looking for.

 

[Homburg]

i am not submissive to my magic wand

Hahaha!!! That's brilliant