"Infrared", feedback and a question

[PaulX35]

Earlier, I posted a draft version here, of a story based on the sex on a train theme: Infrared.
I used the feeback to do some re-editing and rewriting, then posted it for submission.

The story was meanwhile accepted, interestingly after first having been rejected for reasons having to do with the use of <text> brackets in the text: keep that in mind yourself please, because HTML is not eating that

My inexperienced self was left with a question though. Can I now post this again here and draw your attention to the fact that it has been published meanwhile? Or do I just add a reply to the initial thread, running the risk that people (who may have feedbacked) consider it an old thread?
This is not an exposure-dilemma. It's maybe not the standard way to go here, as most stories on which feedback is asked are already accepted[/] and featuring in the story sections. I looked for feedback first, intending to use it for the final version. And I think those who took time to comment on it should know what it became.

Hand me a few comments please; I don't know what the common practice is here.

Meanwhile, I'll add the link to the final version here as well.

http://www.literotica.com/stories/showstory.php?id=69441

 

[weed]

I can't answer your question but I got a kick out of your story. Amusing as well as naughty and not too long for a "quickie" if you will.

I kind of like the occasional unfullfilled tease and the cybersex theme was the first I'd read. (And I've read a few.)

I only wondered one thing....did she catch sight of his e-mail addy or something or was the infrared connection just a bit of sci-fi? That part of the story didn't make sense to me.

 

[PaulX35]

Admitting ignorance

...I only wondered one thing....did she catch sight of his e-mail addy or something or was the infrared connection just a bit of sci-fi? That part of the story didn't make sense to me.

Weed,

Thanks for the positive words. As to the technical side of your wondering, I do know computers can communicate over infrared ports, but really have no idea if the connection established is something that can be pulled off in real computer life

 

[dr_mabeuse]

Oh Screw the Technical Questions!

That was a great story! I don't know anything about infrared ports and I couldn't care less in the context of this story. They could be using gamma-ray ports for all I care. That's not the point.

Let's face it: no one sends cybersex messages like that anyhow, but it works in the story, and I think it works very well.

The only thing I would have done--and it's just me--is i would have had more real contact between them in terms of awareness of each other. I think if he had looked up and seen her looking at him with a very placid and deadpan look on her face while they were coming on their computers, that would have been a huge erotic charge. I would also have liked hearing the other passengers in the compartment rattling newspapers and talking about sports as these two strangers cyberfucked their brains out.

Very good.

---dr.M.

 

[weed]

Re: Oh Screw the Technical Questions!

Let's face it: no one sends cybersex messages like that anyhow, but it works in the story, and I think it works very well.

---dr.M.

Really?

I think they're great fun.