I'm best friends with my ex husbands wife...

[freakygirl]

ok.. here is the low down.. my ex husband and his wife.. are raising my three older children.. this was my choice, i asked them to take them when i had major problems in my life and couldn't keep myself straight, let alone take care of three toddlers. Anyway, in the last few months.. i've become best friends with his wife. She is the sweetest person i've ever met..

2 weeks ago, my youngest daughter (from another relationship) went home to spend the night with my ex husbands and his wifes youngest son (my three older kids were with me for the weekend). On Saturday night they had stopped at my house on their way to go shopping. We talked for awhile and me, my kids, them and their kids all packed up and went to dinner (they paid). On Sunday when they came back to my house to pick up the three kids and drop off my daughter, they stayed for dinner (i had invited them on Saturday, since they would be at my house anyway). Now if this isn't weird enough. Just last friday night, R (the wife) called me and asked if i wanted to go out with J (my ex husband) and her dancing. I told her i'd call my husband and have him meet us. Needless to say, we had a ball! We didn't get home until 3 am.. and my ex husband said.. "this was so much fun, let's do it more often"

ok, my question is.. do any of you find this completly fucked up or what?

this woman was the one he left me for. Now granted by the time we split up, we weren't really married anyway. we cohabitated together.. i love this man (not in a sexual way, but in the way that he is my childrens father.. my first love.. my first sexual experience.. he has a piece of me..) I have told his wife this, this is something we can talk about.. we've laughed.. cried..hugged and been there for one another..

does anyone else.. know of anyone or have this kind of relationship themselves??

as far as my other daughters father.. that's a whole other story.. long one.. maybe someday i'll post that story.. i'll just say here.. my daughter's step uncle is also her step father... lmao.. figure that one out

by the way.. my kids happen to think this relationship is great..

 

[The_old_man]

Go girl!

Any relationship that is based on love is good.

I know of one relationship where the wife left to form a les relationship. They still are friends.

When ALL members of a relationship are friends sex is insidental.

 

[Mischka]

ok, my question is.. do any of you find this completly fucked up or what?

by the way.. my kids happen to think this relationship is great..

I'd listen to your kids. It sounds like all of the adults in their lives are acting like well adjusted, happy people. What a great example for them.

 

[freakygirl]

thanks for commenting.. it means alot to me..

a few more things.. we don't call each other "step parents".. we have decided to call ourselves.. "co parents".. when introduced there is none of this "this is my mom, step mom, dad and step dad" we are all mom and dad.. although my children don't call her mom nor do they call my husband dad. (i guess they don't feel comfortable doing that, as they were given the choice)

i have a 14 year old boy, a 12 year old girl, and an 11 year old boy... they are all good students... excell in sports.. don't get into trouble.. and as of yet, we haven't had any problems with drugs (not saying we won't. but i'm keeping my fingers crossed)

I really do think that the way we are living is making a huge difference in the kids lives. Hopefully they grow up to have loving relationships also.

 

[Cheyenne]

What a wonderful thing for your kids to see and experience. If only more divorces would end as yours has.

I have someone close to me going through a bitter divorce and custody battle at the moment. It is very hard to watch when her husband starts to put their 3 year old child at the center of their battles, expecting the poor girl to choose sides. To choose who she loves the most. I think his daughter is just learning to fear him. I don't like him anyway, but one thing I never thought I'd see him do would be to hurt his daughter the way he is hurting her now.

 

[freakygirl]

good lord.. even my youngest daughters father isn't that cruel.. and i left him for his step brother..

people like that don't deserve children....

 

[Cheyenne]

people like that don't deserve children....

Which is exactly why there is a custody battle going on. He is nuts, literally, and not capable of taking care of himself on his own much less a daughter, too. We think the child's only chance to grow up "normal" is to spend more time with her mom than with her dad, hoping the good influence will offset the bad influence.