If you work in customer service....

[crysede]

My best friend works in customer service for a cell phone company, and this is my all-time favourite stupid customer story:

A guy called demanding his money back because his cell phone didn't work after he went scuba diving with it.

My friend told him that he would not get a refund because it clearly states in the manual that came with his phone that it could not be submersed in water.

The guy interrupted her telling her she was an "fucking idiot" - he'd bought the water proof model, Ocean Blue!

She valiantly tried to keep from laughing her ass off while informing him that Ocean Blue referred to the colour of cell phone he had purchased, it did not mean the phone was waterproof.

 

[Guest]

What is the most idiotic situation, comment, etc that someone has said to you.

"I flew on your airline, but my elbows weren't comfortable. Can I get a free flight?

 

[Liontamr]

Some of these are great

One of my most memorable..

A woman is bringing a broken plastic whistle back into the store. (Keep in mind it's a 4 buck whistle) She complains that she bought it only a few days ago and it's already broken. Upon looking at the whistle it's quite obvious that it's been chewed on. I try telling her that it's not the store's fault that it's been chewed on and that she should expect that the teeth would easily break through the plastic even if it does have a bit of a rubber coated lip to it.

She insists that she didn't bite through it and that it somehow broke on it's own through the sheer power of her lips pressing together.

While I don't feel we have to replace, I will allow her to get a new one even if I have to pay for the whistle myself just to get this woman - who is very adamant in her request - to shut up and relax. I even do her one better:

"Well we'll replace it... How about we just give you this metal whitsle"

"Well I don't want that... I'll just take the same plastic one again."

"But you know the metal whistle won't crack or break."

"The metal will hurt my teeth though!"

I just walked away and let someone else deal with her.

 

[J.B.]

Just to clarify….

lobito if you work in customer service, an attitude is the WRONG thing to have on that kind of job. Showing it anyway.
Just MY observation.
cybergirly1989 Agreed. If you're going to do it, you may as well do it right. All though yes customers may be stupid, they can never think you feel that way.


Those of us who work in customer service put up with a lot of crap. And if we’ve managed to last 4, 5, 6, 7, more years then it means we know how to handle the harder customers. I personally don’t hate my job. I love it. Yes, people complain. Yes, I was aware they were going to when I took this job.
We’re not bitching about that. That doesn’t mean we don’t get some unusual people calling. And I’ve noticed those of us who work in customer service like to trade stories sort of like children comparing cuts, scars, and bruises.

 

[Belilica]

If nothing else, being in customer service has been a bit of an eye opener. It's really not worth it to make others feel like crap, so I'm generally a lot nicer to cusomer service reps and things like that. I've been there 2 years now, but I've only ever freaked out once on a customer, but they were calling me horrile things, and telling me that I should never have kids because I'd be a horrible mother (we work with kids all day). Her sister in law apologized to me later, saying that the woman was "just like that" and she always has been. She didn't have a problem with me.

 

[J.B.]

Just laugh at the crazies. That’s the best medicine.

 

[Aurora_s_Flame]

I work for the municipal government...a Citizen Service Representative is the official job posting...so you name it, I've probably come across it.

I do love my job, especially when I get the chance to help people out, but it is stressful when everyone takes every little thing that the rest of the city is doing out directly on you. A lot of people seem to be under the impressions that I must not pay taxes or water bills etc etc etc. Ya, that's a load o' crap. I make okay money, but I work my ass off for it. Definitely keeps me on my toes.

Most common comments...

"The cheque is in the mail..." on rare occasions it actually is!
"I paid that already..." ya, last year dearie...
"I pay so many taxes and still my road is shit..." wait till you see MY road!

Extra-ordinary comments...

"If I were to slip you my phone number for a date, could you "accidently" delete my parking ticket?"...*pleads the 5th on this one! hehehe...What? He was hot! lol j/k*
"Can I count my budgie as a dependant on my tax return?"
"Do you think if I reduce flushing my toilet to once a day my water bill will go down?" K, eww!

~ Rora

 

[dreamer]

I got a "I've got no qualms about kicking your ass boy..." over a $2 late fee back when I worked at Blockbuster.

That was one I still laugh at...dude was like 6'2 and 300 if he was an ounce. I actually laughed...out loud...the look on my cashier's (I was the manager) face was priceless. Then I told him it's no big deal, reminded him when the tapes were due in and took the fee off...something we did EVERYDAY...but this guy had his panties in a serious bunch...

I've gotten some good ones but for some reason the look on that cashiers face when I totally defused this guy with one chuckle will always stay with me.

 

[J.B.]

Now. Whenever you feel sad you can look back on that day and laugh.

 

[Guest]

I worked a customer service job once... I got fired the same day I started... something about asking people if their fucking morons, was against company policy.
ahh well.. it was a summer job.. screw it.

Maybe if you asked them if THEY'RE fuckin morons they might have understood you.

Spelling lessons, anyone?

 

[symplesimon]

The problem with customer service

You can help out customers with ALL their problems with whatever product you sell them Except their own stupidity... I am a ticket broker and I sell tickets for well over face value to hard to get events. I explain this to every person I sell to, I am going to charge you more than the face value, however it alays seems that the people who bought the cheapest stuff I sell call up wondering why it says $45 on their ticket and they paid $95. However the guy who paid $1100 for a ticket that says $65 never complains? Belive me in my business I get to talk to alot of pissy people and I have to make them feel good about themselves and there purchase, all it takes is not talking down to them and making them realize that they are right in having purchased the ticket. Then I can hang up the phone and laugh at them...sorry my sentance runs on and on....

 

[peachykeen]

Well after leaving teaching when I moved to the UK all of my jobs (all 2 of them) have been intensively customer-service focussed and I have to say, even though sometimes some people can be a bit of a challenge and annoying, I really don't mind it.

I know sometimes when I am here I just come off a big cranky bitch (cuz, sometimes I am a big cranky bitch), and although I can at times be a little bit that way with other workers, I'm really pretty happy to serve people, help them get what they need, even if I can't actually change the situation. Someone just being a bit stupid or dense might amuse me, and I will admit to feeling a twinge of glee watching them get all flustered on occasion.

Here's what I've learned: often people just wanting to be listened to. If someone comes in all pissed off, I can either stand there rolling my eyes with a hand on my hip and then dismiss them saying "Well there's nothing I can do", or I can offer them a seat, ask them if they'd like a cup of tea, sit down and hear them out as they rant and rave, and say "Gee I'm really sorry that happened to you. I don't know that there's anything I can do about it just now, but thanks for bringing it to my attention. I'll see what can be done from having it happen again in the future."

I try to treat the people I deal with in that context the way I would hope someone would treat my mom. Cuz, you know, my mom can be a bit ditzy, she forgets stuff, she repeats herself, stuff like that. I'd like to think that someone whose job it is to help her as a customer would be a bit patient and compassionate.

But yes, people really do say and do the most ridiculous things. Ya just gotta keep smiling and roll with it.

 

[agezinder]

After working over 13 years in various customer service positions the best advice I can give to anyone who works in customer service is this....."Don't let the 1% of those bad, irate, pissy, *put your own adjective here* customers ruin 100% of your day."

 

[J.B.]

You guys'll apreciate this....

http://macnelly.com/shoefolder/shoe_archive.asp

Damn look up the one dated 8/14/002. I thought It was a direct link.


It's sitting on my desk right next to my computer.....

 

[lorddragonwolf]

while working for a grocery store in florida, we were getting ready to close on christmas eve. as i was telling customers at the door we are closed, and hearing the well they are inside still shoping to i only need one item, and of course being cursed at.

One asshole tried to slip past while i let a customer out, as i grabed him and pushed back out he looked at me and said look i am a cop here in town let me in or go to jail. i told him to go for it then asked the officer that came up behind him if he was a member of the deptartment. well the guy shit his pants and walked away real quick.

 

[dreamer]

After working over 13 years in various customer service positions the best advice I can give to anyone who works in customer service is this....."Don't let the 1% of those bad, irate, pissy, *put your own adjective here* customers ruin 100% of your day."

So true...I can't even remember the last time I let a customer 'get to me' I figure the irate ones are mad enough for the both of us...and the stupid ones are PLENTY stupid enough for the both of us...

One side-effect I did notice working in customer service for so long...expecially in Management where you usually only see the escalations and problem customer...is that it has lowered my opinion of the public at large. I am working hard to regain that faith in humanity but it feels like an uphill journey some days.

 

[deliciously_naughty]

My favorite quote of all time, happenned to my best friend and not me. She was doing the overnight shift at a big hotel in boston.

Idiot calls down to the front desk and asked "What's that flashing light?"

b. calmly replies "Ma'am that's lightening"

Idiot "Can't you turn it off?"

B "I'm sorry ma'am, I don't have control over the weather."

Idiot hangs up.

roll of eyes

 

[Ms_Lilith]

I've worked in various pharmacy-type stores (Shopper's Drug Mart, etc).

Anywho, I was a cashier (or customer service representative *pffft*), and I often had to work by myself on closing shifts. That's fine, I'm okay with that. But I'd have a lineup of 10 people, and most of them understood I was alone, and was going as fast as humanly possible. This one woman (she happened to be from Washington state) was standing in the lineup (it was 8:30 pm, or thereabouts). She was reading a magazine in the lineup, and was tapping her foot impatiently. Finally, she left her spot in line and broke into the front and slammed her hand on the counter, and began yelling that, if I didn't get to her soon (there were like, 2 people in front of her by that point), she was going to miss her movie. I asked what time the movie started and she said "10". I apologized and told her I was doing the best I could, but that she would have to wait her turn, and she went off on me, just yelling that I was a stupid fat bitch, and that I didn't deserve to have a job, and all that rot. The Pharmacist came up from his post at the back of the store, and took her by the arm, and guided her away, and then gave her a talking-to about respect, while I took care of the rest of the customers. Then that stupid woman came back, and she actually apologized! The pharmacist made her apologize!

 

[Ms_Lilith]

In my current job, I'm a switchboard operator at a real-estate office. There are 120 realtors that work out of my office. The reception staff does not have access to addresses for listings, we don't have access to any info on the listings. We know which realtor is SELLING the listings, however. The reason we don't have access to listing info, is just that we wouldn't have time to look at it anyway. We are SO busy... we get at least 750 calls a day, and between only one or two receptionists that work at a time, that's a bit much for us to deal with if we also had to look things up for clients.

So we usually just tell the person inquiring that we'll page the realtor, and have him call them back with the info they're looking for. Most people understand that we're busy, and they're fine with that.

The other day, I was working with another girl, and this guy called in. He wanted info on some address in the west part of Victoria. I couldn't give it to him, and explained why. His reply was "can't you just GET UP, OFF YOUR CHAIR, and WALK OVER TO THE COMPUTER to check this up for me? Are you THAT useless of a person? Don't you know ANYTHING?"

I grit my teeth and told this 'gentleman' that I'm sorry he's so impatient, but I am UNABLE to give him the info he wanted, and I would be "happy" to page the particular realtor to call him. He said I was worthless, and then hung up.

 

[dreamer]

I've had several apologies in my day too...and gotten quite a few for employees after the situation is resolved. Sometimes I don't think people have ANY idea how horrible they are being...it's like children throwing a tantrum they just lose control.

 

[bozinka]

Oh my... I am laughing my ass off at some of these...

I have been on both ends, as I'm sure we all have. I personally hate having to call in for customer service places like bill, etc. Drives me nuts, and a lot of the times, I end up in tears, because I get people who assume, because I need to make payment arrangements or some such thing that I'm an idiot. Or a loser. "Can't you just borrow the money." "Why don't you get a job."

And, I have worked customer service in many ways. I used to do reception for a Pediatric clinic... errrr! The number of parents who would wait until the last minute for things... one of our favorites... the mom who waits until 4:45 the day before the cut off on immunizations, then calls and demands we do them - even though she has missed her last 3 appointments.

But, my all time favorite - my husband builds computers for friends, and helps them out when they have problems. We have one, super annoying guy.... calls my H with this problem "My speakers are not working. I checked, they're plugged in, connected, the volume on the computer is up, etc." So, H finally goes over after work, is done in 5 minutes - he hadn't turned the speakers on!!! Or "My printer is funny. It's making funny sounds, and acts like it's printing, but nothing is happening... or it's printing funny." H is like - well did ya check the ink. This guy is a complete dolt. Bought a surround sound system for his kids for Christmas, and actually asked H to come over early Christmas morning to set it up. When H said no, the guy guilted him into going over on Christmas eve and doing it!!!!!

Ah, well, that's it for now. I'm sure I'll think of more later!

 

[Vilac]

I've worked many jobs that require direct contact with the public. It's not necessarily my cup of tea, but I think most everyone goes through similar situations with the public at large.

Now that I own my own businesses...I'm the guy that everyone runs to when someone says "I want to talk to your manager! <or "The owner">.

I'll always remember something I read several years ago...and I only wish I could remember who wrote it. It was called the "10% Rule". To make a long theory short...it went like this:

10% of your customers will be notoriously unhappy, miserable, impossible to please assholes. This 10% you should be more than happy to send packing down the street to your competition. Let him handle the headaches. Then, you accomplish two things: 1. Your problem is gone, along with the stress it entails, and 2. Your problem is not only gone, but it gets passed on to your competetor who in turn has to deal with the issue instead of you.

Makes sense....except when you realize that if your competition is doing the same thing....you're just passing the assholes back and forth. lol

Still makes some sense to me, though. <shrug>
V~~~~~

 

[Belilica]

J.B. - That comic was hilarious!

The stories are great everyone, makes me feel that I'm not alone dealing with people like that. It's wonderful!

 

[J.B.]

thought you'd like that.