If you ask a woman out for coffee...

[human_male]

Hi there. If you ask a woman out for coffee, does she automatically assume you just want sex? And if so, what should you say if you just genually want to go somewhere and get to know her? What's the girlie code for that?

 

[Gutterslut]

Hmm.
Some guys have asked me and the tone of their voice, or the way they said it pretty much told me what they really wanted. Especially those guys I've said maybe two words to - it's just obvious.

The guys that I believed actually showed me they had stuff in common, and we could carry a conversation, etc... and that made me think it's more than just sex.

Hope that was more than just a jumble of words! Good luck!

<33

 

[human_male]

Hmm.
Some guys have asked me and the tone of their voice, or the way they said it pretty much told me what they really wanted. Especially those guys I've said maybe two words to - it's just obvious.

The guys that I believed actually showed me they had stuff in common, and we could carry a conversation, etc... and that made me think it's more than just sex.

Hope that was more than just a jumble of words! Good luck!

<33

Which do you prefer, just out of curiosity (I mean you personally)? Do you like the "Me Tarzan, you Jane. You come with me. Grunt grunt." Or do like someone to want to get to know you first?

I only ask because I knew someone who thought I was wonderful in every way except sexually. She loved it when they just came up to her bold as fuck, told her what they wanted and dragged her off by her hair. And that is so not me.

 

[Gutterslut]

Which do you prefer, just out of curiosity (I mean you personally)? Do you like the "Me Tarzan, you Jane. You come with me. Grunt grunt." Or do like someone to want to get to know you first?

I only ask because I knew someone who thought I was wonderful in every way except sexually. She loved it when they just came up to her bold as fuck, told her what they wanted and dragged her off by her hair. And that is so not me.

that kind of cocky mentality doesn't really turn me on. i'd rather a guy who wants to get to know me first, because if i can interest him in more than one area, i start feeling like the shit. and girls love feeling confident and wanted. we love to be chased.

: )

 

[human_male]

that kind of cocky mentality doesn't really turn me on. i'd rather a guy who wants to get to know me first, because if i can interest him in more than one area, i start feeling like the shit. and girls love feeling confident and wanted. we love to be chased.

: )

OMG, that's incredibly interesting. I've never heard it put like that before. Please tell me more.

 

[human_male]

we love to be chased.

: )

That's probably why I haven't done very well so far. I've never chased anyone. I've never made much of an effort at all, come to think of it. Well, there was this girl who worked at the video shop that I spent weeks chatting to and trying to get to know (which was an enormous effort for somewhat introverted me) until I finally asked her out. That's the most chasing I've ever done.

 

[boo56]

Coffee...?

HM:

Coffee...? Maybe.

I'd say invite her to a baseball game. Or a soccer match or something. She'll think that you think that she's just one of the guys. No guy with any romantic intentions would think of taking the object of his affection to a sporting event to get to know her.

If you get her to the ballgame, you will need to be more attentive to her than the sporting event, of course.

Then again, I've had going for coffee work. I'm just suggesting that if you want to avoid the obvious - try sports.

 

[mjgir73]

Dpends on the woman tbh and the guy as well.

I have one female friend and we have coffee and that's all it is. Took us 5 years or so to have that cup of coffee from when I had first asked her out for coffee lol.

I know when I ask someone out for coffee all I want is coffee and a chat.

I have a friend who thinks coffee means a quicky etc etc.