If anyone has any advice...

[Lionblade]

I do not mean to speak from ignorance, as I am sure that this has been covered many times before.
Perhaps a little background, for several yrs. now I have found myself increasingly attracted to the thought of being dominated by an older woman, how much older dosn't realy matter, just that she be older. The one oppertunity that I may have had w/an older woman wasn't realy quite what I had expected, she was a sub and seemed to desire things that were probably not only border-line illegal, but (in my opinion) outrite massacistic. I am currently involved in a very serious relationship, one that I would never jeopardise, but we do swing on occasion, and enjoy it very much. The problem being, wer are both subs at heart, methinks. While that makes for a very sensual passion. Sometimes I think we both just want to be used for the pleasure of it. Misti, my wife, enjoys it very much when I just pin her down and bend her to my will, as do I and visa-versa, but neither of us are very good at dominating the other.
So I guess my question is rather broad, but I will try to sum it up; How should we breach this lifestyle in a mutually bennifical way?
Any advice that anyone may have would be greately appreciated, and thank you
sincerely/playfully
Josh and Misti

 

[Lancecastor]

Personally, I'd keep pinning her down, my friend.

But it sounds like you'd also like to get a Domme chik in your house sometime...feel free to correct me if I'm guessing wrong.

I take the view that nobody can tell me what's good or right for my sex life, so I think you should read, learn, ask, etc...but above all, have fun, I say.

Cheers

Lance

 

[Lionblade]

Personally, I'd keep pinning her down, my friend.

But it sounds like you'd also like to get a Domme chik in your house sometime...feel free to correct me if I'm guessing wrong.

I take the view that nobody can tell me what's good or right for my sex life, so I think you should read, learn, ask, etc...but above all, have fun, I say.

Cheers

Lance

No, not at all. That sums it up nicely.
Thank you

 

[Cirrus]

I dominated my Dom...once. We thought I might be switch, and I think, under the right circumstances, I am, just not with him. That might be your case.

Even if it's not, you can still enjoy this kind of play even if you're both true subs. Think dominance as an act of submission. I've heard of this one working a few times. Get her into that submissive headspace, the one where she'll do anything you want her to do, and then order her to dominate you. Tell her what to do, where to start, anything you think will work. That's what did it for me. I tried simply dominating him...which was awkward at best, so we called the scene off...or so I thought.

He told me to pay him back for everything he's done to me, to make him hurt and use him like he uses me...and yeah...I did. It was fun, and mutually satisfying. It's not something He and I would do again, I much prefer submitting, but there's a LITTLE bit of switch in me.

Give it a go, see what happens. Enjoy yourselves.

Failing that, if you are swingers, you might want to do as Lance suggested and enlist the help of a female dominant. If your wife is sub as well and cannot switch, she'd enjoy it too.