I'd really appreciate some feedback on this one.

[HappySpouse]

I can't figure out how I feel about this one. I already know there are some stylistic changes I want to make in the future, but I think I hit the point where more edits would start to make it lose it's cohesiveness. I respect the people I've interacted with on these discussion boards and I would take your feedback to heart.

A couple people were kind enough to read a version along the way, and I can't thank them enough for seeing some of my blind spots.

I would appreciate hearing about anything that sticks out to you good or bad.

It's 20,000 words about a bisexual wife's lesbian journey, but it's pretty varied.

Keep the Blindfold On



Thank You

 

[RandyD1369]

Interesting premise. I wonder how it would've turned out if the "device's controller" had turned out to be a male--or a couple of coworkers who thought Emma might be interested in joining them.

I suspect the "less than thrilled" comments after the story are mostly based on its placement in the LW category instead of Lesbian. In LW, it's as if some readers are only looking for an excuse to be offended--so they can offend the author right back. Lesbian is far more accepting.

Keep writing and good luck.
Randy

 

[MissMandy86]

Wow .. 6 pages .. i enjoyed ot but thought it wss a bit long

 

[Omenainen]

Did you post it to Loving Wives or did Laurel move it? Because damn, what a category for this to be in.