I want to touch tuppies with Phelia

[Fata Morgana]

I once used the "mashing vulvas" expression at work and one of my more delicate colleagues said "do you mean touching tuppies?" It doesn't have the same mental image does it? Seems very refined and delicate like china teacups and lace handkerchiefs.

Phelia come on, let's be ladylike for a change. I'll tape up my ears.

 

[KingOrfeo]

Pics or it didn't happen.

 

[Fata Morgana]

Pics or it didn't happen.

Oh there will be.

 

[Fata Morgana]

We need the Top Tuppy Toucher to give us marks out of ten.

 

[Fata Morgana]

I'm going to Veet* my tuppy so Phelia is comfy. Back in a bit.






*veet is Bert on autocorrect which made me want to kill myself.

 

[Phelia]

Oh, yes darling! It's so delicate-sounding. Let us tap our tulips! Make our kittens kiss! Line up our love buttons!

I will keep my pinky out (but I'm not telling where the rest of my fist will be).

 

[Phelia]

I'm going to Veet* my tuppy so Phelia is comfy. Back in a bit.






*veet is Bert on autocorrect which made me want to kill myself.

Oh my, so smooth. Better not do a running start. It'd be like a slip 'n slide. I'd fly right out the window, probably.

 

[Emerson40]

I'm going to Veet* my tuppy so Phelia is comfy. Back in a bit.






*veet is Bert on autocorrect which made me want to kill myself.

Obligatory...

Bert has user is on fake iggy for veeting and not waxing.
Remove user's Tupper mound?

 

[yossi]

You guys are going to need the womanizer in on this action.

I'm calling myself the womanizer nowadays.

 

[Emerson40]

Nah-mah-STAY!

 

[Fata Morgana]

Oh my, so smooth. Better not do a running start. It'd be like a slip 'n slide. I'd fly right out the window, probably.

I left it on a little too long whilst waiting for the Friends episode to end. Now I'm very tender and my tuppy looks like a joint of gammon.

Be gentle with me.

 

[Fata Morgana]

Nah-mah-STAY!

I had summat to ask you and now it's gone out me fucking head.

 

[Fata Morgana]

You guys are going to need the womanizer in on this action.

I'm calling myself the womanizer nowadays.

Bring cheesecake!

 

[yossi]

Nah-mah-STAY!

...in bed all day, if this is the company I'm keeping.

Bring cheesecake!

Cheesecake and cobbler. Oh, yes.

 

[Fata Morgana]

I had summat to ask you and now it's gone out me fucking head.

Oh yes. Emerson have you read about the big bust up between Ann and Nancy. Ann's husband tried to throttle Nancy's kids!

 

[Phelia]

You guys are going to need the womanizer in on this action.

I'm calling myself the womanizer nowadays.

If you are dropped off at my apartment on Friday, 2017 will officially go from being The Worst Year to The Best Year.

Hmm, what's your Amazon name?

Good Smelling Adorable Sex-Goddess Warm Sweet Kinky Hot for Cheese-Loving Couples(pink)

Nah-mah-STAY!

I bought a stupid little eye mask that says "NamaSTAY in BED" because it was cheap and my apartment is brighter than the surface of the sun by about ten to seven, but it's dumb and pink and blocks out precisely zero light. Never trust a bad pun!!!!

 

[Fata Morgana]

If you are dropped off at my apartment on Friday, 2017 will officially go from being The Worst Year to The Best Year.

Hmm, what's your Amazon name?

Good Smelling Adorable Sex-Goddess Warm Sweet Kinky Hot for Cheese-Loving Couples(pink)



I bought a stupid little eye mask that says "NamaSTAY in BED" because it was cheap and my apartment is brighter than the surface of the sun by about ten to seven, but it's dumb and pink and blocks out precisely zero light. Never trust a bad pun!!!!

I like the dark. Duct tape your head, works for me.

 

[Phelia]

I left it on a little too long whilst waiting for the Friends episode to end. Now I'm very tender and my tuppy looks like a joint of gammon.

Be gentle with me.

Aww! I'll just blow on it like a birthday candle or a bowl of warm soup. You know, real romantic shit.

Oh yes. Emerson have you read about the big bust up between Ann and Nancy. Ann's husband tried to throttle Nancy's kids!

The Heart drama? So fucked up! And really makes me want to listen to Barracuda!

 

[Phelia]

I like the dark. Duct tape your head, works for me.

I like the dark and I like being warm so my solution has been to wear a zipped up hoodie, pull it down over my eyes, and then put the mask over both my eyes AND the hood. Pitch black. Heaven. Utterly ridiculous. And why, even if I get married, I will always need my own bat cave to retreat away to.

 

[Fata Morgana]

Aww! I'll just blow on it like a birthday candle or a bowl of warm soup. You know, real romantic shit.



The Heart drama? So fucked up! And really makes me want to listen to Barracuda!

OMG! I'll put croutons on top. Crunchy Tuppy!

It's so sad. Apparently they didn't speak the last 20 dates of the tour and had separate dressing rooms for the first time ever. I really hope they work it out. Have you seen who she married though? He looks like an exhumed corpse.

 

[Fata Morgana]

I like the dark and I like being warm so my solution has been to wear a zipped up hoodie, pull it down over my eyes, and then put the mask over both my eyes AND the hood. Pitch black. Heaven. Utterly ridiculous. And why, even if I get married, I will always need my own bat cave to retreat away to.

I like the dark and the cold. I'd make a great mole.

 

[La damnee elle la licorne]

 

[raindancer]

I brought my double dong in case of admittance.

 

[Fata Morgana]

Tippy sounds like a fish. I don't Enjoy this euphemism.

Phelia, I like my time alone. Although I wish mio maestro were at home all the time I also like that he is not, having time to want him, to be not in that zone of being to be not on someone else's schedule is valuable to me. A living apart together situation or living next door to a partner or like you say, a room of your own, is a valuable thing, tremendously valuable luxury worth prioritising.

Tuppy is short for tuppence! I'd never call it that, never fear.

 

[Fata Morgana]

I brought my double dong in case of admittance.

Hey petal. Not seen you about for a bit.