I know it's childish, but I just had to post this....

matriarch

Rotund retiree
Joined
May 25, 2003
Posts
22,743
Flatulence ban for club pensioner

A social club in Devon has banned a 77-year-old man from breaking wind while indoors.

Maurice Fox received a letter from Kirkham Street Sports and Social Club in Paignton asking him to consider his actions, which "disgusted" members.

Mr Fox, a club regular for 20 years, said: "I am happy to oblige them, there is no problem. I do get a bit windy - I am an old fart now."

He said he had to leave the club about three times a night.

In its letter to the retired bus driver, the club said: "After several complaints regarding your continual breaking of wind (farting) while in the club, would you please consider that your actions are considered disgusting to fellow members and visitors.

"You sit close to the front door, so would you please go outside when required. So please take heed of this request."

Mr Fox, who lives in nearby Princess Street, said the letter was a surprise because he had been given no verbal warning.

"I think someone has complained about the noise. I am a loud farter, but there is no smell.

"I do not think it [the letter] is unreasonable, you get ladies in there."

Mr Fox also spends two days a week at the nearby Palace Place club, but said he had no complaints about flatulence there.

The club said there was no one available for comment.

Full story

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*blink*
:D
 
If he's sitting by the door, that's just plain lazy not to go outside :rolleyes:

I'm amazed at how polite the letter is, though!
 
I'm waiting for him to write a "tell all" book about the incident.

Suggested title: Gone With The Wind

Rumple Foreskin :cool:
 
Is he trading off his CO2 emissions? Send him to Bali with the other windbags.
 
lloyd_5 said:
Is he trading off his CO2 emissions? Send him to Bali with the other windbags.
Ooh! Farting will get your club to pay your way to Bali?
 
FLATUSCENTS Scented Suppositories....Break Wind Without Breaking the Mood.
 
As a nearly official 'senior', that article depressed me thoroughly. Sad, really. And it's too bad no one had the courage to speak to the man, sending a formal letter was cowardly, imo.
 
Grushenka said:
As a nearly official 'senior', that article depressed me thoroughly. Sad, really. And it's too bad no one had the courage to speak to the man, sending a formal letter was cowardly, imo.

It implies that someone had a meeting or something! I know.
 
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