I am forming an elite hunter-killer unit..

[Problem Child]

....to win the war on terrorism.

It will consist of a select group of Lit. women, sequestered away in a desert hideout, living in close proximity. Once sufficient time has passed, their menstrual periods will synchronize, and the PMS developed by this group of elite females will be the most fearsome weapon in the U.S. arsenal, aside from a nuke.

A few men on the board will be kidnapped for training purposes, primarily for the women to attack as they see fit. My first choice for the male training targets are ppman, Kidrock, and Yayati. These three have been chosen for there extreme boneheadedness, and a tendency to view women as objects.

The initial members of the 1st Literotica Amazon Battalionwill be:

Captain K. Muffin- This female has been chosen for her vicious attacks and her skills with machinery and weapons. Plus she can write really hot after-action reports.

Lieutenant. D. Amazon- Specializes in lurking and striking with great surprise. Plus, she's already an Amazon, so there is less training involved there.

1st sgt. R. Fruit- This female is deceptive. She can infiltrate the enemy with expert flirtations and eroticism, and then strike like a hell cat. Excellent in all positions as well.

Sgt. C. Body- Highly intelligent, and can weather sustained assaults from the enemy. Her ethnic origin will allow her to go undercover and mix with the enemy to gather top secret info.

Sgt. B. Rose- Battle-hardened and spoiling for a fight. This chick is worth a hundred Taliban.

Sgt. Cheyenne- Fantastic with figures, she will be the battalion logistics and supply person. She will be valuable if we ever forget who the enemy is because she holds grudges and has a photographic memory.

All training will be conducted by myself and Major O. Clozoff. A certain amount of liberal sex may be involved in order to promote the proper esprit de corps among the women. The major and I will be happy to accomodate the women in this respect.

Any further applications for admittance to the battalion may be submitted to Major clozoff, or myself. An oral entrance exam is mandatory.

That is all.

 

[Rubyfruit]

Fuck off

 

[Problem Child]

That's the spirit! Kill, kill, kill!

 

[p_p_man]

....to win the war on terrorism.

It will consist of a select group of Lit. women, sequestered away in a desert hideout, living in close proximity. Once sufficient time has passed, their menstrual periods will synchronize, and the PMS developed by this group of elite females will be the most fearsome weapon in the U.S. arsenal, aside from a nuke.

A few men on the board will be kidnapped for training purposes, primarily for the women to attack as they see fit. My first choice for the male training targets are ppman, Kidrock, and Yayati. These three have been chosen for there extreme boneheadedness, and a tendency to view women as objects.

The initial members of the 1st Literotica Amazon Battalionwill be:

Captain K. Muffin- This female has been chosen for her vicious attacks and her skills with machinery and weapons. Plus she can write really hot after-action reports.

Lieutenant. D. Amazon- Specializes in lurking and striking with great surprise. Plus, she's already an Amazon, so there is less training involved there.

1st sgt. R. Fruit- This female is deceptive. She can infiltrate the enemy with expert flirtations and eroticism, and then strike like a hell cat. Excellent in all positions as well.

Sgt. C. Body- Highly intelligent, and can weather sustained assaults from the enemy. Her ethnic origin will allow her to go undercover and mix with the enemy to gather top secret info.

Sgt. B. Rose- Battle-hardened and spoiling for a fight. This chick is worth a hundred Taliban.

Sgt. Cheyenne- Fantastic with figures, she will be the battalion logistics and supply person. She will be valuable if we ever forget who the enemy is because she holds grudges and has a photographic memory.

All training will be conducted by myself and Major O. Clozoff. A certain amount of liberal sex may be involved in order to promote the proper esprit de corps among the women. The major and I will be happy to accomodate the women in this respect.

Any further applications for admittance to the battalion may be submitted to Major clozoff, or myself. An oral entrance exam is mandatory.

That is all.

It's just a plot to get all the women for yerself isn't it...

You can't fool me...

 

[Oliver Clozoff]

PC, (sorry, didn't catch your rank) I'd be honored to accept a commission into this unit to provide a sexual morale boost. As I wouldn't want to sap the hormonally-derived aggression of these Amazons, I'd like to suggest sexual relations be restricted to the luteal phase of the cycle following cessation of menses.

Also, when the troops are not deployed, they should wear camo teddies.

That is all. As you were.

 

[KillerMuffin]

I outrank you Ollie, love. I'm a captain and you're a mere major... *grins*

I'm Navy, PC, remember that...

 

[Problem Child]

PC, (sorry, didn't catch your rank) I'd be honored to accept a commission into this unit to provide a sexual morale boost. As I wouldn't want to sap the hormonally-derived aggression of these Amazons, I'd like to suggest sexual relations be restricted to the luteal phase of the cycle following cessation of menses.

Also, when the troops are not deployed, they should wear camo teddies.

That is all. As you were.

Lost me on the menses thing. I'm just talking about a gang-bang every other night. It's lonely in the desert. The camo teddies are an excellent idea. I need to order a gross of M1A1 condoms and a five gallon can of astroglide.

We're both Majors, but you outrank me by date of joining Lit. Any other orders?

 

[Oliver Clozoff]

Yes, Now that you mention it...

Set penis anti-gravity repulsion belts to high and let's get down to business. We've got our work cut out for us since unit morale around here seems pretty low right now, but as professional officer in fiercest outfit of the world's greatest military I know you can handle it.

It's go time!

 

[CelestialBody]

 

[Siren]

And to think, Binny is running now

 

[seXieleXie]

KM is a rear admiral!

hahahhahahahahaha...ha... ha... please don't kill me KM

 

[Problem Child]

It's objectification for the sake of national security Sgt. Body. Get on the team and come on in with us for the big win.

Maj. Clozoff, remind me to requisition a lot of para cord.

 

[Oliver Clozoff]

Teddies, gang-bang. Who's objectifying here?

Did I hear you say something, Sargeant?

I didn't think so. When Major Child or myself want your opinion we'll give it to you. Now, take this government-issue dildo and attach it to your M-16 like a bayonet. You've earned yourself KP duty.

 

[CelestialBody]

 

[Problem Child]

I don't take orders from dicks. Back the fuck off.

Good killer spirit. I like that. Excellent.

 

[Siren]

Looks like someone is beggin for some extra duty time

 

[Oliver Clozoff]

maybe I should've included this? ------>

Easy, baby.

J-O-K-E spells joke (i.e. what this whole thread is).

 

[KillerMuffin]

Rear Admiral. I like that.

 

[Laurel]

I didn't think so. When Major Child or myself want your opinion we'll give it to you.

Major Child. snickers

 

[Marxist]

Did anyone see a sexxy young girl with a lolly? Up thread? Great, keep doing what you're doing and I'll be right back.

 

[Rick DeVille]

I love the smell of KY jelly burning in the morning

 

[CelestialBody]

 

[Rick DeVille]

Fuck Protocol. Major Child, report to my pussy at once. That is an order!

If he's court martialed, do we get to see the evidence?

 

[Desert Amazon]

 

[Cheyenne]

All I can say is that it's lucky I'm a civilian and have no clue what all those rankings mean. I'm not used to being outranked, remember?