Humiliation in swinging/bdsm lifestyle

[Pete69USE]

So i wanted to know if this is true for most couples in these kinds of lifestyle or not. i have seen but not tried anything like this i wanted to try this kind of lifestyle at least once but i did do research on it and found that whenever i saw a swinging video where everyone is respectful i enjoyed it but whenever humiliation of another partner came up i hated that i tried to think in my mind of different scenarios as well regarding this and it was the same thing swinging i could do if it was respectful no judgement no humiliation but as soon as humiliation like degrading another partner for having say small breasts or something like that came up i always hate the thought. on the other hand i like BDSM as well a lot i want to try it but i only want it to be my partner and me and i am fine in that situation with a bit of degradation but only a little bit so as it does not feel like bullying. so what do most of you all think about it please let me know.

 

[IrisAlthea]

Not quite sure what you are after but swinging and BDSM are different things. The two circles can overlap but only if you want them to.
Humiliation and degradation privately is also different from public humiliation. It’s quite possible to like one but not the other.

 

[emme8]

Bdsm can be whatever you and you partner or partners want it to be. If you like multiples great, but if not fine. If you get off on humiliation go for it. if you don't let it be known that's one of your limits and make sure your partners respect you enough to respect that limit.
We are all kinky enough in our own ways.

 

[Pete69USE]

Not quite sure what you are after but swinging and BDSM are different things. The two circles can overlap but only if you want them to.
Humiliation and degradation privately is also different from public humiliation. It’s quite possible to like one but not the other.

Its exactly what i am talking about the point when bdsm and swinging overlap. agree on your second point as well my feeling exactly but it is almost impossible to find someone like that who can respect the limits of your play.

 

[squirtlover43420]

why is it impossible.
so i have been into bdsm since i was 14.

i have a submissive babygirl and a slave/sub.
i have had mfmf mff fmf .
can i offer some advice!

 

[Pete69USE]

why is it impossible.
so i have been into bdsm since i was 14.

i have a submissive babygirl and a slave/sub.
i have had mfmf mff fmf .
can i offer some advice!

I Just sent you a DM.

 

[Roughscrewu]

I have asked a Submissive wives
'Why is your Married Pussy so Wet for a Stranger'
It seemed to get them more Aroused by the subtle humiliation

 

[Older_Pervert]

In my experience, humiliation is an intensely arousing activity for some and a big turn-off for others. A good Dom has a duty to find out what works best for each individual sub and then use those “ triggers” (exhibitionism, pain, humiliation etc) to enhance the mutual arousal and satisfaction of both parties

 

[LittleSwitchy]

As in any relationship. Know who you are with. One might love light humiliation, another heavy humiliation, another none at all. Say the wrong thing with someone. You might go from hot heavy to leave me the hell alone.
Best thing to do is have open communication with your partner. Ask what they like don’t like. It takes time to get to know someone. Enjoy the time getting to know them. That’s half the fun.

 

[cubbyfire04]

So i wanted to know if this is true for most couples in these kinds of lifestyle or not. i have seen but not tried anything like this i wanted to try this kind of lifestyle at least once but i did do research on it and found that whenever i saw a swinging video where everyone is respectful i enjoyed it but whenever humiliation of another partner came up i hated that i tried to think in my mind of different scenarios as well regarding this and it was the same thing swinging i could do if it was respectful no judgement no humiliation but as soon as humiliation like degrading another partner for having say small breasts or something like that came up i always hate the thought. on the other hand i like BDSM as well a lot i want to try it but i only want it to be my partner and me and i am fine in that situation with a bit of degradation but only a little bit so as it does not feel like bullying. so what do most of you all think about it please let me know.

It's been established here that swinging and BDSM are two very different things (and sure, swinging and BDSM lifestyles can coexist).

The first part of your question seems to describe more of a cuckold/cuckquean scenario when humiliation gets involved in non-monogamy (granted, "humiliation" can mean many things, so I could be wrong)... And a more extreme side of cuckoldry, at that.

I dare say most swinger couples engage with like-minded individuals celebrate their bodies and their sexuality. It's typically overwhelmingly positive, at least in the absence of toxic relationship foundations.

And with regards to BDSM... Humiliation/degradation is more of an option that a rule. By no means is humiliation a requirement to participate in the BDSM lifestyle. Domination and submission DO NOT mean degradation is involved. In fact, it could mean the exact opposite.

I am very much a sub for my wife, but her form of domination often involves restraint, edging, and orgasm denial. Or anal play that borders more along the lines of worship. She uses phrases of encouragement like, "you're such a good boy... I know how much you love that... It's too bad this beautiful cock isn't going to cum tonight... Your sexy ass was just made for this, wasn't it?" And so on, and so forth.

Open your mind to the vastness of BDSM. Those four letters are a wildly limiting catch-all phrase for an utterly limitless spectrum of human sexuality. Like it, or hate it... There's a reason the movie is titled "Fifty Shades of Grey." In fact, 50 isn't even a drop in the bucket.

 

[Roughscrewu]

I have met wives that only want Humiliation from someone other than their husbands. They seem scared to let their partner know how much Sexual Humiliation gets the Aroused

 

[IrisAlthea]

I have met wives that only want Humiliation from someone other than their husbands. They seem scared to let their partner know how much Sexual Humiliation gets the Aroused

Even if it feels ok for the partner to know about an interest in humiliation, it still doesn’t mean that it will fit well in every type of relationship. And I think that can be true from both sides of it.

 

[petes478]

Not quite sure what you are after but swinging and BDSM are different things. The two circles can overlap but only if you want them to.
Humiliation and degradation privately is also different from public humiliation. It’s quite possible to like one but not the other.

So true. Exactly right.

 

[NotOutYet20]

im curious about being dominated

 

[Gln1517]

So i wanted to know if this is true for most couples in these kinds of lifestyle or not. i have seen but not tried anything like this i wanted to try this kind of lifestyle at least once but i did do research on it and found that whenever i saw a swinging video where everyone is respectful i enjoyed it but whenever humiliation of another partner came up i hated that i tried to think in my mind of different scenarios as well regarding this and it was the same thing swinging i could do if it was respectful no judgement no humiliation but as soon as humiliation like degrading another partner for having say small breasts or something like that came up i always hate the thought. on the other hand i like BDSM as well a lot i want to try it but i only want it to be my partner and me and i am fine in that situation with a bit of degradation but only a little bit so as it does not feel like bullying. so what do most of you all think about it please let me know.

My wife is submissive but one hard limit is no name calling. She is in to humiliation, being the only one naked, being led on a leash and collar, etc. Being a naked server is one that she likes and submitting to a group.

 

[NotOutYet20]

My wife is submissive but one hard limit is no name calling. She is in to humiliation, being the only one naked, being led on a leash and collar, etc. Being a naked server is one that she likes and submitting to a group.

hello, like im in San Fran, did you want to be friends

 

[Gln1517]

hello, like im in San Fran, did you want to be friends

Certainly

 

[NotOutYet20]

Certainly

ty tyt ty hugs
im hoping to like make more friends

 

[Lucy_Lastic]

One might love light humiliation, another heavy humiliation,

Humiliation is something I have found over the last couple of years I quite enjoy, but limited experience, mostly verbal.

Whats the difference between heavy and light?

 

[whenagain]

I feel like the difference between heavy and light really depends on the person/dynamics they’ve established. I’ve had some experiences that could be considered heavy, but there was an element of trust involved.

 

[PinkPassion86]

Humiliation has to be a complete decision.
You don't walk into it half hearted or without full trust.

You have to understand the kinks of the other person involved. It's a hard one to get right, but if you do. Fuck it's gorgeous.

 

[whenagain]

Humiliation has to be a complete decision.
You don't walk into it half hearted or without full trust.

You have to understand the kinks of the other person involved. It's a hard one to get right, but if you do. Fuck it's gorgeous.

Do you have examples of this?

 

[eroticspank]

So the question is humiliation a typical part of the swinging/BDSM lifestyle? As mentioned above, swinging and BDSM can be completely different things. In my opinion, humiliation is a very personal thing. So many couples do humiliation behind closed doors. Sure there is the public humiliation scenes that can be done in a swinging setting.

BDSM to me is much more than just bondage and Sado-Masochism. Many of the scenes involve talking and getting into the person's head. The mental-emotional part makes the scenes so much more intense. But to get to that level you need to be open to each other....IN TO ME SEE...intimacy. Developing a deep trust level is very important. Once you get to that point, humiliation can be easy and very arousing.

It is very similar to embarrassment, humiliation is just a bit further. Example: After having sex your boyfriend says, "Wow you really came hard!" You remember were out of control and screamed very loud. Instantly you feel embarrassed and blood flows to your face resulting in a physical reaction. "So you like being called a slut when you are fucked?"....you don't answer at first. He presses you again. Eventually, you say, "Yes." Now you feel humiliated and your body reacts again. The key is how he reacts. If he accepts that "slut" part of you and embraces it with no judgment but encouragement then you can let your feelings flow, be turned on, and be humiliated again.

This^ is just one example and I understand not everyone would feel humiliated in that scene. It is just about tapping into your partner's secrets, insecurities, and fantasies. You bring them out in the open with acceptance and love.
ES

 

[twister947]

Strange thread...

 

[lisaharlot]

So i wanted to know if this is true for most couples in these kinds of lifestyle or not. i have seen but not tried anything like this i wanted to try this kind of lifestyle at least once but i did do research on it and found that whenever i saw a swinging video where everyone is respectful i enjoyed it but whenever humiliation of another partner came up i hated that i tried to think in my mind of different scenarios as well regarding this and it was the same thing swinging i could do if it was respectful no judgement no humiliation but as soon as humiliation like degrading another partner for having say small breasts or something like that came up i always hate the thought. on the other hand i like BDSM as well a lot i want to try it but i only want it to be my partner and me and i am fine in that situation with a bit of degradation but only a little bit so as it does not feel like bullying. so what do most of you all think about it please let me

You’re really smart to be asking these questions. First, humiliation and degradation aren’t the same things, at least not to me. I think of humiliation play as things like clothed partner/naked partner, toe sucking, performing tasks… degradation is having your body made fun of, being called piggy… one can be fun and loving and the other damages.

Next, in healthy BDSM we set limits and use safe words everyone must obey. A lot of people have physical limits but forget the emotional ones. No or light degradation is a very legit limit.

We also communicate in healthy BDSM but in a D/s context. The moment, and I mean the very second, you as s couple or poly decide you’re going to explore BDSM, the bottom(s) needs to start being subservient and start focusing on pleasing the top. Two equals discussing how this is going to go about being Top/bottom will leave everyone frustrated. People will develop a check list of activities instead of an actual power dynamic.