pabloback
Literotica Guru
- Joined
- Jun 3, 2001
- Posts
- 8,255
and what do they really mean?
WOMEN'S ADS:
40-ish........................... 49
Adventurer.................. Slept with all your friends
Athletic........................ No tits
Average looking.......... Has a face like a basset hound
Beautiful...................... Pathological liar
Contagious Smile........ Does a lot of Ecstasy
Educated..................... Banged her Political Science professor
Emotionally Secure..... Medicated
Feminist....................... Fat ballbuster
Free spirit.................... Junkie
Friendship first........... Trying to live down reputation as a slut
Fun.............................. Annoying
Gentle......................... Comatose
Good Listener............. Borderline Autistic
New-Age.................... All body hair, all the time
Old-fashioned............ Lights out,missionary position only, no BJs
Open-minded............ Desperate
Outgoing.................... Loud and Embarrassing
Passionate................... Sloppy drunk
Poet............................. Depressive Schizophrenic
Professional................ Certified Bitch Redhead..................... Bad dye-job
Reubenesque............. Grossly Fat
Romantic.................... Looks better by candle light
Social.......................... Has been passed around like an hors
doeuvres tray
Voluptuous................. Very Fat
Weight proportion w/height.... Hugely Fat
Wants Soulmate......... Stalker
Widow....................... Drove first husband to shoot himself
Young at heart.......... Old bat
MEN'S ADS:
40-ish...................... 52 and looking for 25-yr-old
Athletic................... Watches a lot of NASCAR
Average looking..... Unusual hair growth on ears, nose, & back
Educated................ Will patronize the shit out of you
Free Spirit............... Banging your sister
Friendship first....... As long as friendship involves nookie
Fun.......................... Good with a remote and a six pack
Good looking.......... Arrogant
Very good looking... Dumb as a board
Honest..................... Pathological Liar
Huggable................ Overweight, more body hair than a bear
Likes to cuddle........ Insecure mama's boy
Mature..................... Older than your father
Open-minded......... Wants to sleep with your roommate but she's not interested
Physically fit............ Does a lot of 12-ounce curls
Poet......................... Wrote ex-girlfriend's # on a bathroom
stall
Sensitive.................. Cries at chick flicks
Very sensitive.......... Gay
Spiritual.................. Got laid in a cemetery once
Stable..................... Arrested for stalking, but not convicted
Thoughtful............. Says "Excuse me" when he farts
WOMEN'S ADS:
40-ish........................... 49
Adventurer.................. Slept with all your friends
Athletic........................ No tits
Average looking.......... Has a face like a basset hound
Beautiful...................... Pathological liar
Contagious Smile........ Does a lot of Ecstasy
Educated..................... Banged her Political Science professor
Emotionally Secure..... Medicated
Feminist....................... Fat ballbuster
Free spirit.................... Junkie
Friendship first........... Trying to live down reputation as a slut
Fun.............................. Annoying
Gentle......................... Comatose
Good Listener............. Borderline Autistic
New-Age.................... All body hair, all the time
Old-fashioned............ Lights out,missionary position only, no BJs
Open-minded............ Desperate
Outgoing.................... Loud and Embarrassing
Passionate................... Sloppy drunk
Poet............................. Depressive Schizophrenic
Professional................ Certified Bitch Redhead..................... Bad dye-job
Reubenesque............. Grossly Fat
Romantic.................... Looks better by candle light
Social.......................... Has been passed around like an hors
doeuvres tray
Voluptuous................. Very Fat
Weight proportion w/height.... Hugely Fat
Wants Soulmate......... Stalker
Widow....................... Drove first husband to shoot himself
Young at heart.......... Old bat
MEN'S ADS:
40-ish...................... 52 and looking for 25-yr-old
Athletic................... Watches a lot of NASCAR
Average looking..... Unusual hair growth on ears, nose, & back
Educated................ Will patronize the shit out of you
Free Spirit............... Banging your sister
Friendship first....... As long as friendship involves nookie
Fun.......................... Good with a remote and a six pack
Good looking.......... Arrogant
Very good looking... Dumb as a board
Honest..................... Pathological Liar
Huggable................ Overweight, more body hair than a bear
Likes to cuddle........ Insecure mama's boy
Mature..................... Older than your father
Open-minded......... Wants to sleep with your roommate but she's not interested
Physically fit............ Does a lot of 12-ounce curls
Poet......................... Wrote ex-girlfriend's # on a bathroom
stall
Sensitive.................. Cries at chick flicks
Very sensitive.......... Gay
Spiritual.................. Got laid in a cemetery once
Stable..................... Arrested for stalking, but not convicted
Thoughtful............. Says "Excuse me" when he farts
