How to make amends?

[heavyhitter01]

So he's so weak that if he had those pasdwords, he'd still be talking to her when his dick twitched while thinking of her? He's not man enough to control his urges?

Of course he is. But he wanted to make absolutely sure that his wife had no worries at all. This was also the same day that they exchanged passwords for every other email account they had, both personal and professional. He told me afterward how relieved he was that they had done that, because there would be NO secrets. Period. Ever again.

You really do like to think the worst of people, don't you? You might want to work on that.

 

[IrishEyes80]

So he's so weak that if he had those pasdwords, he'd still be talking to her when his dick twitched while thinking of her? He's not man enough to control his urges?

BINGO! No other reason for him to be afraid if he knew the passwords.

His poor wife!

 

[heavyhitter01]

Baby? do you even know the definition of self righteousness? because ummm....you might want to look it up.

And while you may feel that you didn't pay enough, you are still pissed off that you paid more than she did. And I don't have to stomp my foot or pout to say that. I get to say that with a giggle.

I'm not ripping apart anything. I'm stating what the end result will be. She will cry and repent (even if only on a surface level), you will then appear the bully and asshole. And your friends will still be cowards who even as adults, you seem to think are so wittle and pwuny they can't stand up for themselves. So they let you, the big stwong man, fight their battle for them And as a consequence, your friend will walk away without a scratch. Because when the shit comes down, he gets to deny involvement. He didn't tell you to do anything. Right?

My friend paid dearly for what he did with ms_intrigue, so it's safe to say he didn't get away clean.

However, when it comes to the whore's payback, my friend WILL walk away from this without a scratch. I'm quite proud of that, so thanks for pointing it out.

 

[IrishEyes80]

Of course he is. But he wanted to make absolutely sure that his wife had no worries at all.

No worries at all would be for him and his wife to know the passwords so she would know without a doubt that he can control himself.

 

[imemkay]

You missed the past where I said that I hadn't paid nearly enough

No, I think we've all heard that loud and clear many times....
So here's what I'm going to offer you, HH: I'm going to send you my riding crop. This would be a big sacrifice on my part, but I'm willing to take one for the team here. You can use it to beat yourself senseless in the privacy of your own home. Then you can stop harping on the fact that you feel so bad for sleeping with that married woman - cuz we get it. Get it out of your system and then put an end to any future self flagellation.

 

[heavyhitter01]

BINGO! No other reason for him to be afraid if he knew the passwords.

His poor wife!

Since you jumped the gun before you had a chance to read my response, I will restate it here:

Of course he is. But he wanted to make absolutely sure that his wife had no worries at all. This was also the same day that they exchanged passwords for every other email account they had, both personal and professional. He told me afterward how relieved he was that they had done that, because there would be NO secrets. Period. Ever again.

His poor wife...that's funny.

The lynch mob mentality around here is VERY interesting...you people would make an excellent psych study!

 

[heavyhitter01]

No worries at all would be for him and his wife to know the passwords so she would know without a doubt that he can control himself.

And now you missed the part where I said they exchanged all their passwords. Is this selective reading???

He closed down the email accounts where ms_intrigue could contact him. He did that for the good of his relationship. The accounts they each have now can be accessed by BOTH of them.

Why is this so hard to understand? Does no one here share passwords with their spouses? It seems the way my friends are doing it makes perfect sense.

 

[heavyhitter01]

No, I think we've all heard that loud and clear many times....
So here's what I'm going to offer you, HH: I'm going to send you my riding crop. This would be a big sacrifice on my part, but I'm willing to take one for the team here. You can use it to beat yourself senseless in the privacy of your own home. Then you can stop harping on the fact that you feel so bad for sleeping with that married woman - cuz we get it. Get it out of your system and then put an end to any future self flagellation.

You're so sweet.

 

[TeaforMe]

Baby? do you even know the definition of self righteousness? because ummm....you might want to look it up.

And while you may feel that you didn't pay enough, you are still pissed off that you paid more than she did. And I don't have to stomp my foot or pout to say that. I get to say that with a giggle.

I'm not ripping apart anything. I'm stating what the end result will be. She will cry and repent (even if only on a surface level), you will then appear the bully and asshole. And your friends will still be cowards who even as adults, you seem to think are so wittle and pwuny they can't stand up for themselves. So they let you, the big stwong man, fight their battle for them And as a consequence, your friend will walk away without a scratch. Because when the shit comes down, he gets to deny involvement. He didn't tell you to do anything. Right?

My favorite post in this entire thread. Nail effectively hit on the head.

 

[IrishEyes80]

Soooo....then WHY did he need YOU to change his Lit password????

I really feel like it would show his wife more if she knew he could have the password as well and be able to CONTROL himself.

At this point I think your friend is just as shady as LT.


I still feel really bad for his wife....I though you and I had that in common HH.

 

[imemkay]

you know, I AM sweet. Thanks for mentioning that...but really, I'm just tired of hearing how bad you feel.....it's really coming off as sounding, oh I don't know, kind of self righteous???

 

[blulilacgrl]

And now you missed the part where I said they exchanged all their passwords. Is this selective reading???

He closed down the email accounts where ms_intrigue could contact him. He did that for the good of his relationship. The accounts they each have now can be accessed by BOTH of them.

Why is this so hard to understand? Does no one here share passwords with their spouses? It seems the way my friends are doing it makes perfect sense.

Yeah b/c it's not like he couldn't just go and create a whole new email account and keep it secret or anything. I mean pffft.. people can't do that. You're right all he has to do is give her passwords to his email account and he will be faithful. He doesn't have to actually work on, you know, restraint.

But hey. He has you to take all of his shit You are willing to be his whipping boy. You are his keeper and his cleaner, so why should he ever learn to be an adult? You are willing to sacrifice your reputation so that he doesn't have to learn a lesson.

How lucky you are that you have someone like that for a friend. I know that when I am looking for a friend. Using me as a shield when they do something wrong is top of my list.

 

[Lord Pmann]

Of course he is. But he wanted to make absolutely sure that his wife had no worries at all. This was also the same day that they exchanged passwords for every other email account they had, both personal and professional. He told me afterward how relieved he was that they had done that, because there would be NO secrets. Period. Ever again.

Ever again. Good.

If only there was a way to set up anonymous, free emails to communicate.

 

[ima6uldv8]

Of course he is. But he wanted to make absolutely sure that his wife had no worries at all. This was also the same day that they exchanged passwords for every other email account they had, both personal and professional. He told me afterward how relieved he was that they had done that, because there would be NO secrets. Period. Ever again.

You really do like to think the worst of people, don't you? You might want to work on that.

I need to work on nothing. I actually think the best of people. You're the one painting the picture of your friend. I'm making my observations on what you say. You may want to work on getting a life. I also suggested earlier that I believe you're secretly hot for this "mousy librarian". Did she turn you down and that's why you're so vengeful?

 

[Lord Pmann]

How lucky you are that you have someone like that for a friend. I know that when I am looking for a friend. Using me as a shield when they do something wrong is top of my list.

You'll take what you can get, I'm sure.

 

[IrishEyes80]

HH you have to see that you won't be able to convince the people on this thread that your friend is now on the up and up anymore than someone could convince you that TL is!

 

[whynotjustsayit]

Ever again. Good.

If only there was a way to set up anonymous, free emails to communicate.

Hahahaaaaaaaaaaa !!!

Right. It's not like Mr. Sincerely Atoned could never set up another email account his now wife wouldn't be in on.

 

[blulilacgrl]

You'll take what you can get, I'm sure.

I took you didn't I?

 

[heavyhitter01]

So here's a wrapup so far:

Everyone here seems to have an issue with what I have done, and they like to use snark to try to make their point (which just gets you ignored, if you haven't noticed yet).

Everyone here seems to think they are not capable of doing the same thing I have done to ms_intrigue -- though most of them admit that they have never been cheated on or have never cheated (so how can they possibly know?).

The fact of what ms_intrigue has done seems to be glossed over in favor of attacking those who are actually here (me, and by extension, my friend) -- perhaps because that's feeding drama?

The fact of what I have done seems to be dragged up again and again, as though we weren't already aware of it by now.

Now that the drama about ms_intrigue and what happens to her next has died down, there needs to be more drama -- so now the attacks on my friend are starting, (and turning into quite the high school pettiness, I must say).

The bottom line appears to be this:

I'm seen as an asshole, a bully, or whatever other negative term you might like to call me.

My friend is seen as a coward with no self-control.

My friend's wife is seen as a poor little wifey who will suffer forever for her husband's indiscretion.

ms_intrigue, what she did and what she does or does not deserve, seems to be lost in the shuffle of blame and accusations.

When the bottom line is REALLY this:

I'm not actually an asshole or a bully. I'm doing something I feel is the right thing to do, but there are many out there who don't agree with it, for whatever reason. In the absence of honest discourse and questions, there are names being tossed about -- which diminishes your arguments.

My friend is not a coward; on the contrary, he has shown incredible strength and courage in taking full responsibility for his actions and going above and beyond to make his marriage work.

My friend's wife is quite relieved that all this has happened to ms_intrigue, and she is definitely not suffering -- she was the other half of the equation that worked so hard to have a good marriage. She, and my friend, are very happy.

ms_intrigue got at least some of what she deserved. That seems to make everybody happy, with the exception of all of those on this thread. That seems rather...odd. But I suppose there is the whole group think/lynch mob mentality going on, and you guys don't know any better.

So that's where we all stand, right? So you can throw your accusations and snark all you like, and I will sit back and wait -- again -- for anyone who has an intelligent discussion point without name-calling, attacks and high-school antics. Then we'll talk.

 

[whynotjustsayit]

You who is snarky and called us all a bunch of highschoolers, now act as if the problem is us? Hardly.

 

[Lord Pmann]

I took you didn't I?

You wish. Do you know how much your husband pays me to be your friend?

 

[ima6uldv8]

I love how you choose what questions you want to address.

 

[heavyhitter01]

I love how you choose what questions you want to address.

I choose the questions that actually make sense. Suggesting that I am going after ms_intrigue for anything other than the reasons I have stated is simply trying to stir shit. I have explained my reasons over and over. You can go back through the thread to read them if you are unsure of what they are.

 

[ima6uldv8]

I choose the questions that actually make sense. Suggesting that I am going after ms_intrigue for anything other than the reasons I have stated is simply trying to stir shit. I have explained my reasons over and over. You can go back through the thread to read them if you are unsure of what they are.

ME stir up shit? Pot, meet kettle.

 

[whynotjustsayit]

Revised Wrap Up:

Heavyhitter01 snidely continues to denigrate the rest of us for not tacitly approving his proud execution of a mission of vengeance. Then calls us all sorts of unflattering terms because we questions his involvement and motives.. calls that discourse below him. Meanwhile wah wah wah-ing about how misunderstood he is.