How to loosen up my ass...

[2981notrohrm]

So I decided to try gay sex and have been curious about bottoming...a guy used his fingers on my ass once and it was incredible. I wondered how a real cock would feel in my ass.

So I met a guy on Craigslist...a well-hung black man who warmed me up with his fingers, but when it came time to fuck me, he couldn't get in far enough because I was too tight. I've never taken a cock and want it to feel good.

Are toys a good way to loosen up my asshole? Start small or mid-size?

 

[SweetErika]

Yep, toys are great. You can practice on your own with a graduated set of butt plugs, for instance. Using lots of lube, start with the smallest in the set and then work your way up to the largest at your own pace. Of course you can do the same with a partner.

And on the partner front, communicate and insist on tons of warmup, lube and foreplay. After all of that, when you're feeling super ready, get into a position that will allow you to control the speed and depth of penetration (e.g. doggy, you on top). Ask your partner to stay still as you push yourself onto his cock slowly. While you're doing this, it might help to have cock stimulation, or something else that will "distract" you with pleasure. I focus on using a vibe on my clit because it keeps me from thinking about my ass and tightening up. Once he's in and you're totally comfortable (if you're not, add more lube and warmup/foreplay), work up to a rhythm that suits you. At that point, you can let him know he's good to take over the movement.

The communication comes in when you discuss your needs beforehand and give plenty of feedback during. Anyone who isn't willing to work with you to experiment, warm up, go slowly and make this the best possible experience isn't worth having sex with in the first place.

Also, successful anal is usually a result of trial and error, so be flexible and keep experimenting when things don't work.

 

[softbuzz]

If he couldn't get in, it was probably because you weren't letting him in.
Fear of the pain that people say anal sex causes may have caused you to clench up. Clenching will make it very difficult for him to get in and will cause you a lot of pain. I like to clench after the cock is all the way in, it drives the guy wild.
Use plenty of lube, lube around your pucker, inside your ass, and the full length of his shaft.
When he starts to push in, bear down a little( sort of like you're going to dump ) this will open your sphincter muscles and he will slide right in.
The little pain you feel is delicious and then when he hits your prostrate you will discover heaven. If your anything like me, your orgasm will last as long as he can keep his end up.
Just talking about this has caused something to come up that I need to attend to.
Good luck next time, enjoy.

 

[staffordshirelass]

arse sex

is arse sex good for women?

 

[Ellafun]

is arse sex good for women?

There are dozens of threads addressing this question...welcome...and have a look in the FAQs at the top of this page.

Oh, and to answer your question, yes.

 

[monkeyman057]

SweetErica has great advice on this.

In addition - the more aroused you are the easier this will be.

Just go slow with the toys. You can stretch considerably in a relatively short period of time by using larger and larger toys. Go slow - you don't have to hurt yourself to stretch. For what it's worth, I find glass plugs to be infinately more comfortable than the rubber or plastic ones. They are more expensive but in my opinion you definately get what you pay for when it comes to sex toys and particularly butt toys. I recommend borosilicate glass (Pyrex) toys whenever possible just for the added safety factor.

Edit: did I mention, go slow?