how to land a friend?

[Lady Legs]

I'd been friends with my partner for 5 years (ish) before we got very drunk at my 22nd birthday party and decided that we wanted to be more than friends as we sat together on a chair. He turned to kiss me on the cheek and I turned at he same time we ended up in a five minute kiss (it got timed by a friends ex ) and we are still together and as crazy about each other now as we were then

 

[ReadyOne]

My current spouse and I were just friends, activity partners going to plays and lectures and concerts at the university plus a sporadic meal or movie we both wanted to see.

This kept up for many months, all the time I was living with another girl. My (to be) spouse had divorced the year before and was talking about sexual freedom again and just taking lovers without commitment for the next part of her life. And she occasionally dated.

Then one night we went to a movie and spent arm and then leg pressed against each other. From there we went to her house and the hot tub (in suits) where I got a hell of a kiss when we first got into the tub.

Most of the rest of the night was benign, just lots of talk, nothing about sex. But the kiss made me think something could happen, and in the early morning I finally took her top off her shoulders to expose her breasts.

Playing with them didn't get things going (I found out later she has never gotten any arousal from boobs) and by 3AM I was frustrated as hell. It wasn't being horny (my erection had come and gone several times); it was that she gave me that wild kiss tongue first and then went 98% platonic.

Finally I gave up and started getting ready to go home. She pulled her top back up and started walking me though the house back to the bathroom where I'd left my clothes. Then, almost on impulse, she took hold of my arm and steered me into the bedroom. Things quickly got hot after that, and I didn't leave until after 5AM.

The fallout from that friendship turning sexual was devastating when she found out I was living with another girl. But she let me make a choice, bless her heart, and I broke up with my live-in and (of course) eventually married my friend.

I'd do it again, but I'd do it much differently!

 

[HoldenMcCrank]

This is easy to say

and very hard to do. Go forth and be BOLD. If you like her and she like you then tell her. If you want to kiss her then KISS HER!

Life is too short to worry about all the possible negatives.

Good Luck

Holden

 

[Tazidevil]

ok, so i have a major crush/thing for a very cool friend of mine. i have a very good idea that she perhaps may have a thing for me as well, but like all things, i am very weary of ruining our friendship over stupid petty, stuff. you know? she also has a LOT more experience that i do, however, i think there definatly is an attraction, we flirt, we talk about all things, and i think we really like each otehr.

so my question would be, what should i do? i am afraid to waut because i would hate to lose her, or should i wait till i get more definitive proof??? has anyone been in a situation like this, how did it turn out??

thanks for the info

If you two are good friends then trying a relationship out should not make you worry about losing each other. If you as good as friends as you say, you two already have a bond that would most likely stand the test of trying to strengthen it. I say go for it and if the worse should happen, do not let yourself lose her as a friend. Communication lines should never go down (unless due to a massive hurricane, than give it a week and they will be back up).

 

[Lynnezertorte]

I'd bite the bullet and go for it. As many have said, life's too short to waste an opportunity. But if she rejects you romantically don't be an asshole about it cause then you will lose the friendship. Respect her decision and hide any pain/embarrassment you might feel.

Just one woman's opinion.

 

[Ibztone]

This is all very interesting...I too am in the same situation. I think it all has to do with how you ask. If you ask in a not too serious mannor then you can play it off if she says no. Any updates? In any event good luck with it.

 

[guywithglasses]

we kinda skirted around the issue a bit on instant messenger, and a friend of mine made it abundantly clear to her that i like her, i guess via IM today. so, i dunno. its kinda in he rcourt now, and im gonna do the best to back it up.

itll be very interesting to see how this turns out. she knows i am very inexperienced, and i know she thinks thats a turn on. its just gonna take time and the right circumenstances, but im definatly, after a few of our recent conversations, not afraid to skirt the issue, or even in a way, bring it up.


well see. i know she wont be offended or weirded out. i just hope it all works out, for better or worse. things take time, and ive been patient enough, may as well be patient some more. good things will come no doubt.

 

[ReadyOne]

Set up a role-play with her, if she can do that sort of thing.

Call her "teacher" and tell her how hard you get sitting in class and that you're puzeled about how you are expected to keep your attention elsewhere when your balls are starting to hurt from being compressed by your raging hard-on inside your tight jeans.

Play dumb and lead her on. See if she will pick up the idea and start "instructing" you.

 

[Selflessness]

sounds like i'm on a similar boat. though not my intention to land her.

we've been having converstaion about sexuality and related topics. we're pretty open to each other about it too, being honest and joking about it. i know i am not her kind of man. but who knows

 

[guywithglasses]

teh whole teacher thing is cool, well. because shes a professor....interesting. i have thought of it before, but because shes a teacher that may not work.

gas station attendent, maybe that'd be better. he h eehehehehehe

well see, things are going along swimmingly. (havent drowned yet) thanks for all the info

 

[ReadyOne]

teh whole teacher thing is cool, well. because shes a professor....interesting. i have thought of it before, but because shes a teacher that may not work.

gas station attendent, maybe that'd be better. he h eehehehehehe

well see, things are going along swimmingly. (havent drowned yet) thanks for all the info

No... it will work even better because she IS a teacher!

 

[SummerMorning]

OK... I went to the trouble of reading the whole thread...

...now, like the others, I'm waiting for the sequel

BTW - I'm in the "go ahead and ask" camp!

(Going to watch Six feet under now... just a sec while I get some South Park downloading...)

 

[MagicFingers]

Go for it!

Go after her. Don't let her get away without trying, at least.
I made love to several friends in the past and enjoyed every one. One lady, I knew for ~7 years and we got along great. Then one night, we were drinking and smoking (The old days) and we wound up having hot sex on the floor in front of the stereo. (We both loved music and she sang a little on stage.)
I moved shortly after to another state and lost contact. I still regret that, but not the sex.

Friends are some of the BEST people to have sex with.
Would you live to have sex with someone who was NOT a friend?

Use sexual inuindos and touches. Touch her arm, her leg, only at appropriate times and see how she responds. And see if she touches you. There are about 5 or 7 steps to getting laid with someone. I wish I could remember all the steps. Haven't thought of them for a while.
There's talking, eye contact, touching, kissing, intimate touching, Her responding to you.
Something like that.
Look for the signals and act on them when they are there.
Yes, and let her teach you, if you can work that out. Being inexperienced is not a show stopper. You can use it to your advantage.

 

[NaiveOne]

So are you trying for a relationship or just to get her into bed? You keep saying she knows you're inexperienced.... I'm confused!

Thanks

 

[guywithglasses]

well, things are going very well, and its definatly going to happen. were going to see where it goes, but not after some hot, break my back in the bedroom fumbling around.

thanks to everyone who posted here, ill keep you all updated.

i am kinda hoping to start a relationship. but we will see. as long as we have fun,and enjoy being around each other, tahts all that matters..

thankss again, ill keep up on the updates when i can!

 

[SummerMorning]

i am kinda hoping to start a relationship. but we will see. as long as we have fun,and enjoy being around each other, tahts all that matters..

Isn't that what a relationship is?

 

[guywithglasses]

and thus, we start the definition game., yay

 

[SummerMorning]

One suggestion: don't spend too much time defining, just have fun delve into the meaning of things too much in real life and with real people (and even more so with people you feel a sexual attraction to) and you might end up... disenchanting the whole thing.

 

[guywithglasses]

thanks for the info, thast good to know!!

 

[SummerMorning]

*settles down with a nice cheese and fruit plate and a glass of fine tokai and waits for the movie to start*

 

[guywithglasses]

well, we both do work in the industry, bet we could make a hella pro film about it. but hey, thats not fun. i dont even like taking my camera oin vacation.

 

[Joseki Ko]

To see naked Pics of Sarahhh vote a 5 here.


I have a bet with Sarahhh. The Lowest rated story in the Earthday thread wins posted naked PICS of the loser. So if you want to see her naked vote a 5 on her story, or at least a 4

Thanks for your help.

 

[SummerMorning]

?!?

 

[guywithglasses]

y3eah, what the heck was that aboot?

 

[SummerMorning]

That is what I call desperate for votes...