how to convince shy wife to explore ?

[frankhotfantasy]

Hi, Friends ; i am really new here and this gonna be my first post . in real life i always fantasize about sharing my wife and taboo sex ideas most of the time related with her . We have married for near about ten years now and we do have a happy and successful sex life . she has the ability to rock on the bed but the problem is she is very shy by nature and religious as well , she even refuse to experiment new things on bed whether i dream to swap her . I have think a lot about my fantasy and i am sure its not just a kinky thought of brain but its what i desire . These things running on my mind for last two or three years but i have failed to bring it to her . i am afraid it could ruin our relation and trust . I will like to have ideas and advises to convince her to broad her mind . important think is , i don't want to see her to do it on my sake , i will like to see her doing it for her own pleasure . i need to open up her mind , i want to see her think about sex for 24/7 just like me. we love each other a lot but we have totally different character in type . is here anybody who has the similar experience or could advise me what should be my first move to bring my desire to her . waiting for your reply .

 

[NightL]

Bar is open
http://forum.literotica.com/showthread.php?t=846805

She is content, you are not. Your post is all about you. Even "i don't want to see her to do it on my sake , i will like to see her doing it for her own pleasure" is still all about you.

Maybe you should observe a little more - learn a little more - find out what makes her tick or hum, because if you do it right she will not say "no more" she will want more and more. Talk to her, ask her about all the things she really likes and equally important, what she is not so fond of. Build upon what you have, don't impose.

If you start making it all about her, you may be surprised where she will direct you.

Be romantic, caring and loving. There is a lot more to sex than happens in the bedroom - even if the bed has just been made. It is a life style and when you understand it is actually more about giving than receiving, you will be rewarded.

All I read in your post is me me me.

I have been gentle in my response - tread carefully here. Most positive and helpful replies here will come from those who hold their partners in high esteem. If you appear to place less value on your partner than to getting your rocks off day-dreaming about swapping you will get your arse well and truly kicked here.

 

[smoothg103rd]

Hi, Friends ; i am really new here and this gonna be my first post . in real life i always fantasize about sharing my wife and taboo sex ideas most of the time related with her . We have married for near about ten years now and we do have a happy and successful sex life . she has the ability to rock on the bed but the problem is she is very shy by nature and religious as well , she even refuse to experiment new things on bed whether i dream to swap her . I have think a lot about my fantasy and i am sure its not just a kinky thought of brain but its what i desire . These things running on my mind for last two or three years but i have failed to bring it to her . i am afraid it could ruin our relation and trust . I will like to have ideas and advises to convince her to broad her mind . important think is , i don't want to see her to do it on my sake , i will like to see her doing it for her own pleasure . i need to open up her mind , i want to see her think about sex for 24/7 just like me. we love each other a lot but we have totally different character in type . is here anybody who has the similar experience or could advise me what should be my first move to bring my desire to her . waiting for your reply .

You have a wife ok cool but find a girlfriend who into what you are into don't tell your wife nothing what she don't know won't hurt

 

[bailadora]

You have a wife ok cool but find a girlfriend who into what you are into don't tell your wife nothing what she don't know won't hurt

^^ Looks like someone else is looking to get his arse handed to him.

 

[frankhotfantasy]

Bar is open
http://forum.literotica.com/showthread.php?t=846805

She is content, you are not. Your post is all about you. Even "i don't want to see her to do it on my sake , i will like to see her doing it for her own pleasure" is still all about you.

Maybe you should observe a little more - learn a little more - find out what makes her tick or hum, because if you do it right she will not say "no more" she will want more and more. Talk to her, ask her about all the things she really likes and equally important, what she is not so fond of. Build upon what you have, don't impose.

If you start making it all about her, you may be surprised where she will direct you.

Be romantic, caring and loving. There is a lot more to sex than happens in the bedroom - even if the bed has just been made. It is a life style and when you understand it is actually more about giving than receiving, you will be rewarded.

All I read in your post is me me me.

I have been gentle in my response - tread carefully here. Most positive and helpful replies here will come from those who hold their partners in high esteem. If you appear to place less value on your partner than to getting your rocks off day-dreaming about swapping you will get your arse well and truly kicked here.

thanks for advise . may be , u r right . i love her a lot and for me - she is the most worthy than anything else . "Be romantic, caring and loving. There is a lot more to sex than happens in the bedroom - even if the bed has just been made. It is a life style and when you understand it is actually more about giving than receiving, you will be rewarded" ..... i like your suggestion . its the main point where i need to work . though we have been married for ten years but true is i am 26 and she is 25 of age. we have struggled a lot to establish ourselves and its the true love keep us still tied and we will be together for lifetime whatever the worse happen . she is the best i could ever had and i am ready to do anything for her . she is very much loving , caring and much romantic than me. she wants more time from me but as a service holder i could able to provide only two or three hours to her . life is getting dull day by day and i found myself guilty for this that's why u found only me me and me on my post . it will be great if u people stay with me i/o kicking me out as ur ideas and suggestions could spice up our life.
Thanks.

 

[NightL]

we have been married for ten years but true is i am 26 and she is 25 of age.

Ya what!!!?

Not sure how to respond here - offerings of advice here may well benefit many more beyond the original poster. SweetErika (where are you?) was someone who always gave the benefit of doubt and I'm sure many many relationships were positively touched by her advice well beyond her replies directed to the poster asking the question.

Being married at such an age, I take it life may have got in the way of education? You do have the Internet and you are inquisitive which is a great starting point. So read - hunt down as much information on relationship building as you can. Try to work out how you can bring this information into your world - how do you make it work for your wife and yourself.

What do you do everyday that will remind her just how much you love her? How do you bring joy, laughter, adventure and security into her world. Are you predictable or can you surprise her. How do you contribute to making her environment a space she glows in. How often do you socialise? How often do you take charge of the preparation in organising social gatherings? I'm not suggesting you take over - but on occasion display that you can take care of everything from setting up the environment, atmosphere - food preparation - inviting the guests/family - even cleaning up. When was the last time you took her out dancing? Do something totally out of the ordinary for yourselves - new experiences - could be even an art gallery - seeing a show - play - throw yourselves in the deep-end - totally new experiences - while you may not like some -you may have a laugh together about the experience. Go for walks - grab a tent and go camping, hiking, go to music festivals, go to the beach, love life and live it.

Embrace life around you - love her like she is the most precious person on earth - if your friends don't display that with their partners - hold you head up and show them how it is done.

Put effort in where I suggested and sex will just get better. Happy, laughing, loving people have happy, loving fun sex. It just comes naturally - keep your fantasies to yourself for the time being - you have a lot of work to do before she is the one who asks "so what are your fantasies?"

 

[Emerson40]

You have a wife ok cool but find a girlfriend who into what you are into don't tell your wife nothing what she don't know won't hurt

Hey NotSoSmoothyTen the 3rd,

When I first read your reply I thought "Surely this smooth douche mis-read the OP." The post isn't written as smooth as some would write it, and you do have to take your time to appreciate what FrancisHotFantasy is asking about.

Then I took a quick peek at your post history and discovered that despite your reading comprehension limitations, your reply was right in line with what one should expect from one so proficient in douchery and indifference.

Although your two cents were wasted here, it was money well spent to perpetuate a stereotype.

 

[southern_gal]

I am going to offer my opinion but will state up front that I have had a few strawberry daiquiri's so no points off for misspelling. My answer, let her do it on HER time. Her schedule NOT yours. Let me say that I do hope the both of you get to where you agree on your wants and needs but please go at her pace. I am not un like your wife. I too have a rather strict background and we will leave it at that. My husband has been so patient and supportive that it amazes me. I have a desire at times to be the biggest whore anyone has ever seen but I do niot have the ability to bring it out very often. He is helping. Please be patient with her or she may start thinking that yuour wants are more important than her feelings.

 

[Lord Pmann]

What if she had a fantasy of you getting nailed by a big cocked man? How would she convince you?

 

[tmmmbrrr]

Communication about sex in marriage can be a minefield and you may never really know where to step. If I had this to do over again, I would bring it up by asking open-ended questions that might make it OK for my wife to say, "...well, there is something I've been thinking about," or "...not really, but have you been thinking about something?"

You've already said that you're not interested in sex with your wife in ways that she wouldn't be down with - and that is the only way to go. It sounds like you have a loving and solid relationship, so it should be OK to ask a question as long as it will be OK with you if the answer turns out to be "no" or if your wife will need a little time to think about things.

By the time you've been married many years, that kinda stuff won't be as important as it does now. You might as well get it off your chest.

 

[lovecraft68]

Hi, Friends ; i am really new here and this gonna be my first post . in real life i always fantasize about sharing my wife and taboo sex ideas most of the time related with her . We have married for near about ten years now and we do have a happy and successful sex life . she has the ability to rock on the bed but the problem is she is very shy by nature and religious as well , she even refuse to experiment new things on bed whether i dream to swap her . I have think a lot about my fantasy and i am sure its not just a kinky thought of brain but its what i desire . These things running on my mind for last two or three years but i have failed to bring it to her . i am afraid it could ruin our relation and trust . I will like to have ideas and advises to convince her to broad her mind . important think is , i don't want to see her to do it on my sake , i will like to see her doing it for her own pleasure . i need to open up her mind , i want to see her think about sex for 24/7 just like me. we love each other a lot but we have totally different character in type . is here anybody who has the similar experience or could advise me what should be my first move to bring my desire to her . waiting for your reply .

So you're happy, she rocks your bed, but still not enough huh?

She is not shy stupid, she just believes in monogamy. She is also not necessarily "religious" either just because she does not want to swap.

I know this is hard to believe seeing we are posting on a porn board, but I want you to listen closely

SOME PEOPLE JUST DO NOT BELIEVE IN BRINGING OTHERS INTO THEIR MARRIAGE.

You push her she then feels bad, she feels inadequate, she feels unhappy. This is going to cause trouble in your "happy marriage"

If it gets really bad, maybe she indulges your fantasy out of guilt or obligation, then she feels used and like a whore, then you guys head for counseling and divorce.

All because of your high school fantasies. If she has no interest then do not push her

There are worse things in life than a good woman who does not want to suck another guys cock.

 

[southern_gal]

OP: please take what lovecraft said, to heart. For some of us, sex is more than just.......sex.

 

[frankhotfantasy]

thanks to all for your precious advise and well response . I thought here u people r just hanging with sex fantasies but i realized that u people do sex by making it more than a sex . southern_gal say it well . Also lovecraft words hit me a lot , i really need to think about this in the way she think . i could realize to fulfill any of my fantasy , i have to make her all fantasies true . she don't have any tabbo things but she want to see me playable and loving , i think i should make more time for her , should be more caring as nightL said . trust me , i could not lose her for anything of the world . thanks for understand that we do have a solid and happy relation and this fantasy is only mine and never shared with anyone before . thanks for not misleading me , though it was too easy for u to misguide me as this the first time i post a thread in any porn site. seems this site has the most real educated and smart users . Thanks once again and please keep me advising / suggesting .....it means a lot .

 

[NightL]

I suggest you remove your email address ASAP otherwise you will just open your email address to a flood of spam and other nasties.

People can use the private message facility built into this website forum if they want to contact you.

 

[frankhotfantasy]

I suggest you remove your email address ASAP otherwise you will just open your email address to a flood of spam and other nasties.

People can use the private message facility built into this website forum if they want to contact you.

thanks , mail id is already removed from the post.

 

[1dude]

Thirty years your senior, I can tell you it may well be a LONG wait. I'm still working on just a sexy outfit going out on the town. I think Catholic mothers must have been given specialized brain washing training. I always thought women would at least like other men looking and complimenting good looks. In my case it is more of a worry what everyone else "thinks" which drives action/dress and even her thoughts which I think makes it a catch-22 or at least a simultaneous equation. My wife has finally gotten to the point she will get nude in our well isolated private spa but it has to be late for fear someone might drop by and catch her. I still love her but life could be so much fuller if she would lighten up! Good luck.

 

[JAMESBJOHNSON]

People crack me up chasing novelty and losing something good. Your wife deserves better than you.

 

[frankhotfantasy]

Thirty years your senior, I can tell you it may well be a LONG wait. I'm still working on just a sexy outfit going out on the town. I think Catholic mothers must have been given specialized brain washing training. I always thought women would at least like other men looking and complimenting good looks. In my case it is more of a worry what everyone else "thinks" which drives action/dress and even her thoughts which I think makes it a catch-22 or at least a simultaneous equation. My wife has finally gotten to the point she will get nude in our well isolated private spa but it has to be late for fear someone might drop by and catch her. I still love her but life could be so much fuller if she would lighten up! Good luck.

Thanks for share your thoughts . Yes , i agree with u that life could be so much fuller if she walk on my path . reality is , this is just a secret fantasy of mine and i am not dieing if it not gonna happen . i do love my wife and we have just made for each other . i am living life in her way and that also so smooth and hot and keep us happy . believe , life will show us its magic with passing time .........

 

[frankhotfantasy]

People crack me up chasing novelty and losing something good. Your wife deserves better than you.

what make u to decide that she deserves better than me !! i will be please if u kind enough to clarify as u are trying to hit on my heart , trying to play with my feelings . i have share on of my secret feelings and never meant that i don't love her and want to see her use brutally by someone else and that is what my fantasy is . its for spicing up ourselves . we have that much bond of trust that nothing could keep us separate . we are lovers . by the way , your misjudgement means nothing to me and this site deserve more thoughtful than u and i am sure there are many .

 

[LadyVer]

So you're happy, she rocks your bed, but still not enough huh?

She is not shy stupid, she just believes in monogamy. She is also not necessarily "religious" either just because she does not want to swap.

I know this is hard to believe seeing we are posting on a porn board, but I want you to listen closely

SOME PEOPLE JUST DO NOT BELIEVE IN BRINGING OTHERS INTO THEIR MARRIAGE.

You push her she then feels bad, she feels inadequate, she feels unhappy. This is going to cause trouble in your "happy marriage"

If it gets really bad, maybe she indulges your fantasy out of guilt or obligation, then she feels used and like a whore, then you guys head for counseling and divorce.

All because of your high school fantasies. If she has no interest then do not push her

There are worse things in life than a good woman who does not want to suck another guys cock.

Well said.

 

[smoothg103rd]

Hey NotSoSmoothyTen the 3rd,

When I first read your reply I thought "Surely this smooth douche mis-read the OP." The post isn't written as smooth as some would write it, and you do have to take your time to appreciate what FrancisHotFantasy is asking about.

Then I took a quick peek at your post history and discovered that despite your reading comprehension limitations, your reply was right in line with what one should expect from one so proficient in douchery and indifference.

Although your two cents were wasted here, it was money well spent to perpetuate a stereotype.

Wow that pic was right on the nose fuck outta here pussy you want people to fuck your wife that mean you dont satisfy her but let me fuck her I bet she will forget your name fucking dickhead

 

[smoothg103rd]

Hey NotSoSmoothyTen the 3rd,

When I first read your reply I thought "Surely this smooth douche mis-read the OP." The post isn't written as smooth as some would write it, and you do have to take your time to appreciate what FrancisHotFantasy is asking about.

Then I took a quick peek at your post history and discovered that despite your reading comprehension limitations, your reply was right in line with what one should expect from one so proficient in douchery and indifference.

Although your two cents were wasted here, it was money well spent to perpetuate a stereotype.

O btw suck my dick faggot

 

[LadyVer]

Guys, this is not the general hoard. Take your gb behavior to the gb.

 

[Eilan]

Wow that pic was right on the nose fuck outta here pussy you want people to fuck your wife that mean you dont satisfy her but let me fuck her I bet she will forget your name fucking dickhead

Emerson isn't the OP?

 

[NightL]

Yeah Emerson "you dont satisfy her but" - I am translating here - since there is a missing apostrophe I figure a "t" is missing as well...