How to blow his mind on our wedding night

[Ogirl]

Hi all, I'm a long time reader who just finally signed up getting married in a couple of weeks and we decided to wait until our wedding night before jumping in the sack. Both a long ways from being virgins, but wanted to do this right. But now I'm nervous!! Would love some good tips and tricks to make this a super special night (even more so than it already will be).

 

[tmmmbrrr]

Congratulations, Ogirl! Best Wishes for your new life together.

If you're committed to blowing something on your wedding night - don't start with his mind.

Sorry, I couldn't help it.

 

[Que]

You need not apologize for your efforts at adding a note of sacred to your wedding night.

Regardless of your past you chose to build some anticipation. That alone should give you some warm memories.

You have your whole lives together to try EVERYTHING, don't try to squeeze it all in at once...(unless you just can't help yourselves) Take timeouts to walk or dine or dance.

Fight to keep the intimacy in your bed. Kiss and cuddle and make-out like you did when other things were "off-limits" These things build comfort and pair-bond the two of you.

Foster an environment where nothing is too kinky to discuss, but no pressure to act unless it happens to fall on both your bucket lists. Respect each-other's pasts and varied development.

Separate blankets are key.

Never move a TV into your bedroom. Your bedroom is a refuge for fucking and sleeping. Too easy to tune each other out when you tune in some forgettable entertainment.

Never go to bed without at least a plan to work on a disagreement.

Best wishes on your life together. May it be long and filled with joy far greater than it's challenges.

 

[silverwhisper]

ogirl, i'll be honest, the truth is that none of us can tell you how to blow his mind without knowing: a) what he's into, and b) what he considers normal.

but if you're good with making that kind of commitment (congratulations!), i suspect that it isn't the acrobatics that will blow his mind so much as the relief of all the planning and stress being over, and you guys finally getting your time to yourselves again. it's kinda like eating something after a really long time being hungry that way. :>

however...if you have some idea of what he's into or can sneak a peak at his porn viewing habits, that will probably be a lot more helpful than anything any of us can suggest. assuming of course that: a) he has any, and b) you don't think he'd mind.

if those don't work for you for whatever reason: oral sex is never a bad place to start. if you 2 have been sexting or sharing erotica, take some cues from those choices. and above all, if he isn't proposing something outside of your hard limits, have fun!

ed

 

[NightL]

getting married in a couple of weeks and we decided to wait until our wedding night before jumping in the sack. Both a long ways from being virgins, but wanted to do this right.

Hell that is all sorts of courageous - not what I would call it doing it right at all.

However this is your life not mine with this question - my view is to place no expectation on the night - discuss it and be prepared that this is the start. For a whole lot of understandable reasons this could go all wrong - as long as you are both aware of this and prepared to work together then it can only get better. However, if you go into this night expecting to blow his mind and you don't - sigh... or worse you expect him to blow your mind and he does not - well?

Why do people do this stuff to each other?

Just take the night gently - sorry I should not have written a thing - I just can't get my head around this - I find it bizarre.

 

[CBM514]

Hi all, I'm a long time reader who just finally signed up getting married in a couple of weeks and we decided to wait until our wedding night before jumping in the sack. Both a long ways from being virgins, but wanted to do this right. But now I'm nervous!! Would love some good tips and tricks to make this a super special night (even more so than it already will be).

IMO that night should be about exploration and intimacy...show him how much you adore and admire him and his body and as you give yourself to him the details will work themselves out...

 

[JAMESBJOHNSON]

She'll be too stressed and exhausted to do more than sleep.

The morning of the wedding my daughters expensive gown came apart, so I gave her and mom a fistfulla 100s and sent them to a off the rack gown store. She used one of these pro wedding places, with a wedding chapel, reception hall, and dining/dancing room, and it was awful. It cost 30K and was #2. But! Get people drunk and they don't care.

 

[jomar]

Do him with a strapon, that'll blow his mind.

 

[Cathleen]

Best wishes to you Ogril and congratulations to your groom.

I'm not sure what to say to help since you haven't given much info about the "what, when, how" of your physical relationship thus far.

I wouldn't put too much emphasis on the wedding night as far as "blowing his mind" (or yours for that matter), I'd keep the focus on the warmth and meaning of the day. I'd expect that to be the most lasting heartfelt feeling/emotion.

Have a wonderful day and all the best for a lovely marriage -- and keep posting too.

 

[Ogirl]

I apologize, I should have put in a few more details. First off, the wedding is super simple, we both decided that if it stresses us out, we won't bother with it, and it's all going to be under 1500$ including the rings and the dress, because we have children and know where our money would best be spent secondly, we have discussed in detail our general likes and dislikes in regards to the bedroom. We both are more physical than emotional in the bedroom, and where he loves to receive oral sex, I truly love to give it. We both have extremely high sex drives (trust me, this has been a challenge!!) I'm fortunate to be very easy t satisfy and will do anything to make sure he is fully satisfied. I've just always been in very "vanilla" sexual relationships, so my experience with anything different is limited, although I'm totally all for just about anything he can throw at me (unless he's actually throwing things at me haha).
Edited to add: my only hang up is that I'm slightly self conscious. Never was able to lose that last 10lbs after having my children, and am pretty embarrassed about my midsection.

 

[Scrubber]

Edited to add: my only hang up is that I'm slightly self conscious. Never was able to lose that last 10lbs after having my children, and am pretty embarrassed about my midsection.

Buy a good basque, keep it on, and go for it!

 

[xanach]

"Just be yourself" is usually bad advice, but I think in this case it's what you should do. I don't know about other men, but I like having sex with my wife the way she is. If this man is marrying you, presumably he is crazy about you the way you are and he's not going to want a big show.

Going in with this attitude will probably help your self confidence to boot!

 

[HayleyLuvsSex]

I'd say some sexy lingerie, a nice place to do it, etc. Focus on the environment and make that as special as possible to give it some extra spice.

 

[Vixandra]

Don't expect the best sex ever on your wedding night. It'll be a long day for both of you and its better to just take things as they come.

KISS- keep it simple stupid is a good way to go. Undress each other, have a nice, leisurely fuck while exploring one another and leave the mind blowing for the next night. If you can get a sitter to take the kids for a long weekend, that would be ideal. Then you can focus on each other.

As for the self conscious- he knows what you look like and loves you enough to marry you, yes? So he already probably thinks your a sexy thing and wants to get it on. If you want, set up candles for a flickering play of shadows that's flattering and enticing.

 

[pplwatching]

Congratulations! I don't really have anything new to add to the excellent advice given here so far, but I would like to paraphrase what others have said and maybe toss in a little unsolicited advice.

The best definition of intimacy that I've ever read is "into me see". An enthusiastic lover who realizes that sex can deepen and strengthen the emotional connection in the marriage is worth many times her (or his) weight in gold. Just another reason a little extra weight is better . Seriously though, when your husband accepts who you are and shows you how beutiful, sexy, and desirable you are then you'll feel and understand how special your marriage is. Don't let your insecurity about your shape stop you from sharing yourself completely with him. Sharing in spite of feeling vulnerable gives us the opportunity to feel the power of being so completely accepted by another human being. It will strengthen your marriage.

It's wonderful to explore what our lover finds exciting and fun, because the act of exploring shows them that we care and encourages them share their vulnerabilities with us. A lover who embraces our vulerabilities and our delicious desires without hesitation or question is one of the keys to a fulfilling marriage. Keep in mind, however, that it's a process and not an event. Sharing sometimes takes time, even after years of passion in the marriage bed. By all means ask questions and experiment, but remember that the goal isn't just to 'rock his world' but to really understand what he needs and be the person who he can turn to to get it. Marriage is a commitment to constant change, including in the bedroom. Things that we don't find exciting today may be on tomorrow's sexual hot buttons (or the other way around). Each time we come together we have a brand new opportunity to discover what turns our lover on today. A sexy plan is fun when it all comes together, but be observent and adaptable. If it's just not happening, then move on to something else that you both like.

Finally, don't forget that vanilla is just another flavor - and a pretty damned good one when we're sharing it with somone who makes us smile.

 

[This_is_my_user]

let him take your ass.

 

[tall_bi_prof]

I think he'll be thrilled regardless.

But I think the key to blowing his mind isn't about the wedding night: it's about fucking him on Tuesday's in year 14.

Stay sexual, stay playful. At times when he's super horny and he's close to coming ask him about fantasies (he's more likely to be frank then), etc.

 

[subrinablaze]

An older lady gave me some advice once...if you are the only naked woman in the room, you'll have his attention 100%. Trust me, he won't notice your mid-section. He's not marrying you for your abs. Relax and have fun. Get some lingerie YOU feel comfortable in. That's a guaranteed way to feel sexy and then you will be sexy. CONFIDENCE is sexy. It's like the wedding itself....it's just the first day of the rest of your life. Maybe light some candles, create a sexy little nest and explore each other. Be open.....that'll blow his mind!

 

[Cumference]

Buy a good basque, keep it on, and go for it!

Oh, the joy of misunderstandings!

When you wrote "basque", my thought was this jolly hat-ish object:
http://www.cornichon.org/archives/Ronald%20in%20Basque%20beret%20w%20hat%20shopkeeper.jpg

That would really blow his mind!



..... Looking up other meanings of the word made it less fun, but gave more sense.

 

[bumlicker]

become a guy!!

have a sex change operation, that should blow his mind on your wedding day!!

 

[Primalex]

getting married in a couple of weeks and we decided to wait until our wedding night before jumping in the sack.

Yeah, makes total sense to first make a marriage vow and afterwards figure out if you are compatible.

Adults these days...

 

[jonthechaosman]

The sexiest thing in the world is a woman who is confident in her sexuality. Do NOT let your body issues cause you to be bashful in bed. He loves you and wants you. Be confident. Men are visual. Show off for him. Lingerie can cover areas you want covered but don't be surprised if he wants to see ALL of you.

Most men I know would rather have sex with a chubby girl who loves her body and sexuality than a woman with supermodel body who is too shy to show it to her lover and wants the lights off and covers up.

Congrats on your wedding and my best wish for you is that you are as happy together as I am with my wife. Good luck.

 

[tv46]

Speaking from experience, whatever you come up with, do it the night before your wedding. Wedding days are long and stressful, and not conducive to the high expectations you have set for yourself. Better yet, do everything you have thought of over several days before the wedding.

 

[Cumference]

But we need news from Ogirl!

Did you blow his mind, or did you just blow him?