How do you know you're into BDSM?

[phoenix6666]

Hello,

This is a newbie question really. I understand what BDSM is and have nothing against it. More like I admire those of you who can do it. I could never stand the pain, the big sissy that I am. And I'm sure there are a lot of you who think of it differently, like what qualifies as it and what doesn't.

So to stop rambling, I'm trying to figure out if I fit into this category. Let me explain why. A lot of my more recent fantasies involve me being in control, but not to the point where I am really ordering the person to do such and such. It's more like during the middle of sex, I would be doing most of the action while my partner would just be receiving. Also, in many of my recent fantasies, I find myself enjoying how I bind my partner by the wrists and ankles to some post or whatnot, gently though, or how I blindfold them. While this could be construde as preferring BDSM, I'm not sure if it qualifies as the real thing and would like your expert opinions.

Thank you.

 

[Ms_Toy]

We lets see. BDSM is different to everyone. There are those who enjoy pain, while others don't.

Ours is more of a Dom/sub relationship. My Master is very careful not to inflict lasting injuries, (other than a nice rosy tint to my ass). He is always in control and we use a lot of bondage and denial, blindfolds and of course making me talk dirty while I'm unable to think straight.

But like I said, it's different for everyone.

 

[Vixandra]

I'd say mild kink but that's just me. Very mild kink.

But hey, if it works for you, play on.

BDSM is very difficult to define outside of sprouting the acronyms meaning. Its a very individualized thing that varies from couple to couple, relationship to relationship and sometimes day to day.
If you enjoy a bit of bondage in your sex play it doesn't make you a hard core Dominant who whups up on little submissives for mutual fun.

It means you're doing something you and your partner both enjoy and there's nothing wrong with that long as you're within legal boundries.

Legal boundies, IE: not doing your sibbling, a minor, killing someone, etc.

 

[arctic-stranger]

Hello,

This is a newbie question really.

Cut......

While this could be construde as preferring BDSM, I'm not sure if it qualifies as the real thing and would like your expert opinions.

Thank you.

A) I am NOT an expert. Not long ago i found myself pretty much where you are now.


b) the question is, are you going to pursue this, and to what extent? Only you can answer that. My choice was to pursue, and so far, that has been a rewarding choice, at least in the little areas (all online) where i have been fortunate to find a partner...Soon though we will meet, and then i can really give my desires a road test....and perhaps (hopefully) take this on for the long haul. But it was my choice to follow my desires...what you do is up to you.

 

[AngelicAssassin]

Welcome to the board

Might want to look through the following threads:

https://forum.literotica.com/showthread.php?t=130005

https://forum.literotica.com/showthread.php?t=111267

https://forum.literotica.com/showthread.php?t=115831

Enjoy your swim.

 

[DarkLadyOfDeath]

In pretty words. Be who you are and what you are as a person and enjoy what you do 'r don't do. Life's to short and far to extensive in so many relms to sit back and wonder or question everything.

bluntly.. don't label yourself, it's to damn easy to put stigma and cut yourself from things by classifying it. I'de think many people would agree that they're on this board because it "fits" what they like and can find like minded individuals.. not that they label themselves "bdsm people"

Welcome to the board

 

[arctic-stranger]

bluntly.. don't label yourself, it's to damn easy to put stigma and cut yourself from things by classifying it. I'de think many people would agree that they're on this board because it "fits" what they like and can find like minded individuals.. not that they label themselves "bdsm people"

Welcome to the board

Amen to that! Figure out who YOU are, and go with that.

 

[dr_mabeuse]

I started out thinking I was only into erotic restraint. Girls in ropes turned me on, but the rest of it seemed pretty sick and twisted to me.

That changed as I got into it. One thing leads to another, and soon my entire understanding changed.

Don't worry what it's called. Just go with it and see where it leads.

---dr.M.

 

[dali5671]

when your wife

Likes looking like this.....