How do you get over....

[MaddyBaby]

first time nervousness? When you are with someone for the first time sexually... how do you get over the scared nervousness and all that crap? I mean, I know nervousness is inevitable, but I also know there are ways to make it more barable, no? I know some of you have some tips on how to make the situation more comfortable, special, etc... I'd like to be let in on some of this. Help!

 

[just pet]

first time nervousness? When you are with someone for the first time sexually... how do you get over the scared nervousness and all that crap? I mean, I know nervousness is inevitable, but I also know there are ways to make it more barable, no? I know some of you have some tips on how to make the situation more comfortable, special, etc... I'd like to be let in on some of this. Help!

I like to think of it as excitement... my biggest worry was ... will he like me... do I smell ok... will I measure up... will he like my ass... Then I realized he was worried about the same thing... That is why the first time can be so awkward... being self absorbed. So I just skip the first time and move immediately onto the second

 

[pyramider]

Say "I am nervous"

Start by asking for a hug- Kiss on the cheecks first (the ones on the face not the downstairs ones) -First lips kising is a peck and don't go past his teeth with your tongue. Remember he is nervous too ( I am assuming you are a she and he is a he)- and talk gently, break and have a sip of water. If the chemistry is good the nervousness goes away faster but first times are always difficult for both parties since neither knows what chemistry might develpoe. It also helps to say you are very nervous and the answer has been always "me too"
Hope that helps.

 

[lovetoread]

Well for me personally,there wasnt time to be nervous.

He walked into the hotel room and took me into his arms.

Five mins later we were fucking our brains out.

That made the whole new sexual partner thing go alot smoother.

 

[MaddyBaby]

Good advice, Pet. LOL I would like to skip onto the second. I'll have to tell her that.


And Pyr... don't always assume. I am a she and she is a she too. I've got so many hang ups... I just don't want to screw up anything, you know? Ugh.

 

[CarolineOh]

Maddy, you are bright and witty and beautiful. Keep telling yourself that YOU are a prize, that you are attractive and desirable, and that you have no need to feel self conscious about your looks or (for want of a better word) techniques.
Laughter helps. trye t keep the conversation light, and your expectations low. Don't feel that this needs to be an earth shaking experience, the first time is often awkward.
And a couple shots of jack Daniels wouldn't hurt
Good luck swetie, I hope it all works out great!

 

[MaddyBaby]

YES!!! Alcohol... how could I forget?? That always makes me relaxed.... I love you, Caroline. LOL

 

[CarolineOh]

Good advice, Pet. LOL I would like to skip onto the second. I'll have to tell her that.


And Pyr... don't always assume. I am a she and she is a she too. I've got so many hang ups... I just don't want to screw up anything, you know? Ugh.

Oh, you aren't likely to screw up. Just kiss her and keep kissing her until you feel so happy and comfortable that all that nervousness melts away.

 

[MaddyBaby]

Well, you know! I'm not the MOST experienced girl in the world... and she is a little more experienced than I am. A little intimidating, you know? But, I think things will go well.

 

[LukkyKnight]

Why get over it? Revel in it. Life without excitement is boring, is it not? Accept the reality, bathe in it, don't fight it.

 

[Ebonyfire]

Re: Re: How do you get over....

I like to think of it as excitement... my biggest worry was ... will he like me... do I smell ok... will I measure up... will he like my ass... Then I realized he was worried about the same thing... That is why the first time can be so awkward... being self absorbed. So I just skip the first time and move immediately onto the second

Excellent advice

Ebony

 

[MaddyBaby]

I know, Lukky... but too much nervousness and too many hang ups can ruin it, no? I dunno... help me Lukky. LOL

 

[CarolineOh]

Well, you know! I'm not the MOST experienced girl in the world... and she is a little more experienced than I am. A little intimidating, you know? But, I think things will go well.

If she knows that you are less experienced than she is, she will probably love to be in the role of the "teacher" so you ought to be just fine, and in fact, she will probably find your nervousness endearing.

 

[MaddyBaby]

This is true... oh and so exciting! I can't wait until this weekend!!! Er... I mean... wait....

 

[just pet]

Well, you know! I'm not the MOST experienced girl in the world... and she is a little more experienced than I am. A little intimidating, you know? But, I think things will go well.

The beauty is that this isn't the State Board licensing exam. You can't fail. Go really slowly, look into her eyes, hold her hands, maybe watch a romantic video. And wear great underwear...

 

[MaddyBaby]

Oh how I love underwear. She loves my underwear already... don't ask.. it's a long story. LOL But anyway, underwear are my signature impression. From animal prints to see through lace... I've got it all. Hehehe.

 

[just pet]

Oh how I love underwear. She loves my underwear already... don't ask.. it's a long story. LOL But anyway, underwear are my signature impression. From animal prints to see through lace... I've got it all. Hehehe.

Baby... you'll be great

 

[MaddyBaby]

Thank you, babes. I love this place.

 

[RawHumor]

Oh how I love underwear. She loves my underwear already... don't ask.. it's a long story. LOL But anyway, underwear are my signature impression. From animal prints to see through lace... I've got it all. Hehehe.

Have I mentioned that I totally lust after you??? It's probably come up once or twice.

Here's the REAL key to being able to relax with her - try to ignore the cameras that you've got set up to take pics for us - they'll only make you more nervous!



Just funnin' ya babe!

 

[LukkyKnight]

I know, Lukky... but too much nervousness and too many hang ups can ruin it, no? I dunno... help me Lukky. LOL

OK, as simple and obvious as it seems, Maddy, here's my best top-shelf advice.

Be yourself.

Don't fret or worry over the impression you make upon another, but understand that we all have moments of fret and doubt. They are part of us. When you find the worry impinging, when you are thrashing emotionally yet not getting anything done, stop. Stop, but do not chastise, for there is no gain in the berating of yourself. Look in the mirror, use a friend's eyes if no other mirror is available, and see yourself.

Be yourself.

It is OK to be nervous, to feel the excitement, to jitter a bit wanting to make a good impression. But the impression you want to leave is of you, not of some idealized version of what you think that other person wants or expects you to be. Imagine the alternative a moment with me - imagine creating the image of a suave, continental, worldly lady with so much experience meeting people that you are totally unexcited. Imagine conveying the same self-assurance that the richest, most successful woman alive has. Imagine the person you meet finds this powerfully attractive... would it not be sad for them to be attracted to somebody you are not?

Be yourself. That's who has attracted enough to have this meeting looming, that's who got it this far...

Be yourself.

 

[Nathon_88]

Good luck.....Nervousness....well, just remind yourself that YOU are the hottest piece of flesh on this here meatmarket called life, and that you're gonna........become a complete lamb in her arms, letting her show you pleasures you've never dreamed of......and if THAT doesn't get your juices running, and your nervousness starting to dissapate in favour of horniness.......well......Think of how she's worrying if you like her ass.....then show her how much you do.

 

[CarolineOh]

Oh how I love underwear. She loves my underwear already... don't ask.. it's a long story. LOL But anyway, underwear are my signature impression. From animal prints to see through lace... I've got it all. Hehehe.

Now see, if it was me, and all I got was to see you in your underwear, I'd figure the date was a success right there, and everything else was icing on the cake.

 

[MaddyBaby]

Wow, Lukky! You are SO right! No one has ever said anything like that to me before... I mean, it makes a lot of sense. I am really going to take that piece of advice. I need to develop more confidence in myself, and this seems the way to do it. I should look at the little things I like and build, maybe. Lukky, you're the greatest. Now I know why T likes ya so darn much. *hugs*

And Nathon... when I think I am hot.. I'll start reminding myself of that honey. And I will think about how nervous she is, that will definitely make me feel a little bit better.

And as for you, Caroline... my undies are cute. Maybe I'll have to post some pics later, hm? LOL

 

[pyramider]

Sorry I made the wrong asumption but the advice still the same. I don't know about alcohol, it helps relax but for a male it interfers with performance, my own miandering experience, I just ise fruit juice or simply water and tell her I am nervous and it helps. Sorry for making the wrong asumption but at least I knew I was making asumptions.
I think you are sensetive and gentle. Of course you lack experience; you are very young. All it takes is time and practice. You'll be fine.
Litle nervouseness is not a bad thing. best of lick, I mean luck. (I make typos you know, here is old age for you)

 

[RawHumor]

Wow, Lukky! You are SO right! No one has ever said anything like that to me before... I mean, it makes a lot of sense. I am really going to take that piece of advice. I need to develop more confidence in myself, and this seems the way to do it. I should look at the little things I like and build, maybe. Lukky, you're the greatest. Now I know why T likes ya so darn much. *hugs*

And Nathon... when I think I am hot.. I'll start reminding myself of that honey. And I will think about how nervous she is, that will definitely make me feel a little bit better.

And as for you, Caroline... my undies are cute. Maybe I'll have to post some pics later, hm? LOL

You didn't like my reply? *pout*