How do I find my penis?

[Guest]

my GF and i wnat to have sum good sex but i cant find my penis. can u help? I need sum help. is it the sme thing as my wa-wa, cause i know where that is. pleez, we need some gud advice from u.

And i am not teen you assholes! i am 27 and three quaters. so fuck you.

also, what do girls look like? my GF says she is a girl, but i dont know. she has a tail. can u help me pleez?

 

[Never]

*LMFAO*
Oh, that's bad.. that's really bad.

 

[Dixon Carter Lee]

You think so? LOL

 

[Guest]

<walking away slowly, scared>

Um...? Aw hell..! <running far away!> http://smilecwm.tripod.com/paladin/jesse4.gif

 

[Svedish_Chef]

my GF and i wnat to have sum good sex but i cant find my penis. can u help? I need sum help. is it the sme thing as my wa-wa, cause i know where that is. pleez, we need some gud advice from u.

And i am not teen you assholes! i am 27 and three quaters. so fuck you.

also, what do girls look like? my GF says she is a girl, but i dont know. she has a tail. can u help me pleez?

OK

A) Where you left it

B) No I don't go for older men

C) Cant help you there but is the tail on the fornt or the back?

 

[RisiaSkye]

It should be a message to all of us--we took the time out of our lives to read this thread. And we contributed to it, besides.

I have to hang my head in shame now.

 

[Melody_lane]

See what Britney Spears does to people!?!

scary!

 

[hell]

are you from mars

i didnt understand anything from your thread
what do you mean you cant find your penis
what this question suppose to mean
and what do you mean that you gf has a tail

ARE YOU STUPID ASSHOLE OR WHAT
YOU MORON WHY DO THESE JERKS COME HERE

 

[Guest]

hell why do yo thnik that to me? i don't undrstand. fuck you so much and then sum more! my gf has a tail! She likes to tell stories! why is thata problm?

i use compter all the time as I wrk fer Nasa as a hsuttle enginer. i'm not stupid your stupid.

i really really need sum help here. i tried putting my feet up oin the air to find my penis but hen my mother walked in and i had to think quik so i told her i was tryin to walk on the cieling, ya know, for Nasa and she said why are people naked in space and i siad what's naked and she said when you dont have any clotehs ans people can see your dick and i siad wheres the dick and she said your fathers in the garage.

what did she mean by theat? i need sum help. pleeze

 

[KillerMuffin]

Britney Spears? I thought it was Britny Fox he was in luv with. They couldn't sing fer crap or put out any music worth anything, but man them guys were hot.

 

[Never]

*ROLFLMFAO*!
No.. stop it.. it hurts.

 

[Oliver Clozoff]

Re: are you from mars

i didnt understand anything from your thread
what do you mean you cant find your penis
what this question suppose to mean
and what do you mean that you gf has a tail

ARE YOU STUPID ASSHOLE OR WHAT
YOU MORON WHY DO THESE JERKS COME HERE

Pssst... hell! Britneyluvr is mocking you, mi amigo.

You may also want to look up the defintion of the word "irony" for future reference.

They must be deemphasizing English composition in engineering programs these days, huh? Maybe you can redeem yourself by explaining Ohm's law to us laymen. Shouldn't be too hard for an electrical engineer, right?

 

[KillerMuffin]

Psssssttt Never...

Meet me on your dream thread and we'll come up with something interesting involving Batman, my truck, oreo cookie cake and Britney Fox. You think they're hot too, admit it. Britneylvr isn't the only one after them.

Muff

 

[SSimn]

my brain hurts

 

[Treat]

What in the hell is Brtnylvr on? I want to know what it is so I never get any of it. That's enough to make me start drinking beer at 9:30 on a Sunday morning.

 

[Naked Hunny]

This thread scares me!! but it gives me the giggles everytime i read it hehe

 

[Samuari]

my GF and i wnat to have sum good sex but i cant find my penis. can u help? I need sum help. is it the sme thing as my wa-wa, cause i know where that is. pleez, we need some gud advice from u.

And i am not teen you assholes! i am 27 and three quaters. so fuck you.

also, what do girls look like? my GF says she is a girl, but i dont know. she has a tail. can u help me pleez?

Does she bark, bray, or go "onik"? Oh well, when school gets underway the kids will have less free time!

 

[Passionnee]

Oh god the visuals!!

i really really need sum help here. i tried putting my feet up oin the air to find my penis but hen my mother walked in and i had to think quik so i told her i was tryin to walk on the cieling, ya know, for Nasa and she said why are people naked in space and i siad what's naked and she said when you dont have any clotehs ans people can see your dick and i siad wheres the dick and she said your fathers in the garage.

Ummm! Are you sure you are male, you sound like a woman trying to find her g-spot with her legs in the air. That could answer your question. LMAO

psst if you find errors in this post, it's not because I'm an engineer but French is my first language.

 

[FlyByNyte]

TIPS ON FINDING YOUR PENIS

My advice to you... loosen your grip?

 

[FlyByNyte]

By the way... since when did 3 quarters get anyone anywhere? You can't even buy a bottle of pop for that anymore. Heck, you can't even get anything for under a dollor, unless you call 10-10-220...or something like that.

 

[poohlive]

I told you, I TOLD YOU. Nasa engineers can't find their penis's or spell correctly. I knew it, they are hiring monkeys up there, damn I need a job too.
Ok, some real advice. How to find your penis...
Step 1: Since you are 27 you need to go to a local porn shop, and purchase one video of said shop. Make sure the video contains one or more of the following words: hot, slut, teen, hardcore, or whipped cream.
Step 2: Take the said video home to your house, since you are an engineer (lol so funny) I assume you at least live in a house. Put said tape into the VCR and press play.
Step 3: Sit and watch the said video. Watch for about thirty five seconds, seeing as you don't know where your penis is, it won't take your penis very long to find you. The first thing that starts growing three times its normal size, is the missing penis. Grab a hold of the stick shift, and see how many gears it will go in before it runs out of gas.
If however, nothing grows, and all of the sudden you get a "wet" feeling, go back to said store and purchase a vibrator. Use Vibrator on said wet spot. IN this case, you are a: 1woman, 2lesbian, and 3idiot for not knowing if you are a man or not and being a Nasa Enigineer.
In either case, you have found your penis. Remember, your penis is your friend, take care of it, and it will take care of you.
Oh my goodness, this is too good. I need to write this shit down... oh wait, I already did. YES GO ME.
All right, next question. Your mother is a goat. That is why she has a tail, your sister is a goat girl, that is why she has a tail. You girlfriend is a goat girl, what is why she has a tail. So, you are dating your sister, who is a goat girl. this is good, this is healthy. Have fun with your goatgirl sister. Make sure she watches the said video with you, and tell us all about it. I mean, who doesn't love incest bestiality stories???
Wait a minute... don't answer that.





[Edited by poohlive on 09-13-2000 at 10:50 PM]

 

[FlyByNyte]

Well Said!

Well Said Pooh! A real "knee slapper"... LOL
It is...I found my penis...and it is a knee slapper... J/K

 

[Guest]

Thanks pooh to you who knew wht ta do

i did rented a porn viddeo

i watched it after i got my vcr to work which took about an hour because couldnt find the remote and then it had no battries so my mom did it fr me she said what is this and i said i dont know but i thnk theres goats in it and she said o there are lots of those kinds a tape sin your fathers gargae, so i will check later

the tape was called the womens room so it was pretty cool but i ddnt see a penis or any men even so and the only thing that grew was the thermomter because it was hot that was a joke haha

so i don think pron is the answer

my gf is coming over tonight so i think ill just ask her to look around for the penis while i watch tv and string those beads i string for extra moeny

and im not 27 im 27 amd three quaters

i have to go now because they need help putting a rocket into spce and i tol d them you have to use the remote but they nefer listen

 

[Guest]

Shaba!

Bravisimo Mr. Luvr,

I see your friend Sprinkle Kumquat isn't the only one practicing his creative writing skills on us. Uhm, no wait, that would be the pot calling the kettle magenta. Oops, mah bad.

TTFN

 

[FlyByNyte]

Time to give up on the search...

Just give up man... its obvious that you happen to be a Eunich...