How did you tell your wife/so about your fetish kink?

[sco_72]

I was wondering how did tell your wife/SO about your
fantasy/kink/fetish? Did they respond poorly when you
told them?

I guess my biggest fear is telling my wife and then having
her freak on me. I'm curious about others experiences.

Thanks

 

[loveyamon]

I was wondering how did tell your wife/SO about your
fantasy/kink/fetish? Did they respond poorly when you
told them?

I guess my biggest fear is telling my wife and then having
her freak on me. I'm curious about others experiences.

Thanks

What's the fetish you speak of ??

 

[sheath]

My man and I were discussing fantasies one day...and he sheepishly revealed that he often thought about anal. I mean, hell, anal seems vanilla to me! I was VERY enthusiastic about doing it, and that made him feel more free to tell me his other kinks. Soon, we got into the more extreme...bondage and vampirism, to name some of the 'milder' extreme we're tried...

It just evolved. Now we are completely open and rule out only a few VERY specfic things.

My lovers before this? I always got to a certain point of revealing my fantasies...then they would say, "You're kidding, right?" or "No fucking way"...or in the case of one, when I told him I would like to see two men together, got up, got dressed, and I never heard from him again.

Ya just never know...

S.

 

[white_mage_goddess]

I told my current b/f all my kinks the first week I knew him. I was married to a straight vanilla guy once, not going there again. I wanted to know before I fell head over heels if this guy could handle having a sex life with me. Turned out he not only was into everything I was, but turned me on to many new things I hadn't thought of.

 

[WynEternal]

Mine sorta stumbled into it the first night we met. It's been a trip ever since.

 

[Guest]

 

[sco_72]

Thanks to all those who replied. There really isn't just one thing that I want to try w/ my wife but a bunch of things. I haven't posted alot on these boards but reading different posts on what poeple enjoy or have tried makes me curious of wether or not I would enjoy expanding my sexual horizons. I guess I'll just bring it up and see what happens.

 

[Star of Penumbra]

I've found that the best way to reveal a kink or fetish is to be direct.

"Honey, I'm a pervert."

Then again, I'm always direct and never skirt around issues. So maybe it's just me.

 

[Oscuridad]

This was difficult. Is difficult.

But if I had it to do over, or to do again, I'm taking Star's approach.

Having this self knowledge means sharing it to keep things sane.

 

[drew62]

Just tell her when the moment is right. I finally told my wife about my interest her playing with my ass and it our sex life has been unbelievable ever since. We both enjoy rimming each other, after weve thoroughly cleaned ourselves, and playing with each others ass. Its still a little painful when she tries shoving anything in but we are still trying. I think its because she is at the wrong angle, because when I've done it on myself, the things slide in relatively easy. Im working my way up to bigger things.

I still haven't told her about my desire to suck another guys cock and taste his cum. That may have to wait until. I dont think she has a clue that I want to do it, but she might have an idea that I would like to get fucked by another guy. Afterall, she is playing around with things. If she asked me to let another guy fuck my ass, I wouldnt object at all.

 

[lilpriss]

I have to agree with white mage goddess, I was involved with a guy who was also straight vanilla... to the extreme that vanilla was actually his favorite flavor/smell! I became frustrated and concerned that I'm a nasty perv. Ok so Im a sort of nasty girl... but that's fine! Nothing wrong with it in the least...

The guy I'm with now has an "early picture" of how adventurous I am. We're still exploring...

but I also decided after the last BF that I will be open and honest, that way if he can't handle it then I'll know before I get in too deep. So far things look good.

Since you are married... you may just want to get drunk and spill your guts. You might be surprised at her willingness to make you happy.

If you don't want to jump in but would rather wade into the water, start off by suggesting things that you KNOW won't freak her out. As time goes on get more and more adventurous. I like the 20 questions thing... that is a great way to open doors... it puts a little fun into the mix.

 

[Nefarious]

The last girlfriend and I worked together, and one day we were sharing our past work histories. I told her that I was once a professional pervert. She wanted to know more, so I told her that I ran an adult bookstore. She asked what kind of pervert I was, and I told her that I was an uninhibited group therapist from way back. I figured if that didn't scare her off, I might be on to something. It didn't scare her off, and damn if the ensuing years weren't mighty satisfying.

 

[cjbj]

Get her started on what she thinks/sees/wants to get conversation rolling. Am I too far off base to think everyone,whether they admit it or not, has a kink in their closet. The fun part is getting someone to say it.

 

[shopperst]

Still sounds easier said than done I do like the 20 questions idea though...