Horace and the Feta Cheese Monster

[sirhugs]

Another title in search of...

This one popped into my head as I kicked an empty feta cheese container by the litter box. I thought "what kind of monster left that here?"
the answer of course is a feta cheese monster.
Not sure why Horace popped into my mind.
My one effort at writing to appease my fascination with tentacle monsters was not well received but generated a ton of comments( Not Another Loving Wives Tale - maybe it was the category?).
Maybe I'm just not a sci-fi writer.

This one would need a lot of work to create characters and a situation, let alone a plot.

 

[Brandnewbuddy]

You’re in luck! I have an idea for this.

Horace lives alone and someone keeps eating his stuff and leaving it out, especially Feta Cheese. He sets up a camera and he sees an impossibly tall woman slide out from under his refrigerator, crouch over it and take the cheese.

He can’t move due to financial issues so he decides to stop buying her favorite foods in hopes she’ll leave. Instead, he wakes up with her face right in front of his. She asks why he isn’t buying her food. He of course is too scared to answer so she notices his morning wood and offers payment: she’ll have sex with him and help him with anything he needs and all he has to do is feed her.

So a blowjob later and Horace is calmed down enough to talk. The monster, while huge, is still a not bad looking woman. She does smell though as she doesn’t bathe and just eats Feta Cheese.

Horace eventually works out a routine of feeding and fucking his housemate when he meets a new coworker he wants to have a relationship with. The feta monster is happy to help. He leaves the coworker alone, and by thr time he comes back, she’s already dripping and begging to be fucked or already getting it on with the feta cheese monster and begging him to join in.

Of course, the monster’s appetites might be growing past cheese and Horace might need to start bringing more coworkers over to satisfy his monstrous roommate

 

[TarnishedPenny]

Horace? Sir Terry Pratchett's Discworld heroine Tiffany Aching was a skilled cheesemaker. Oh, and a solid witch, too. She created a sentient cheese she named Horace.

 

[Dingo_Triplesix]

Here is another raw sketch for the monster idea:

A lonely guy, left by his last girlfriend, is eating too much and drinking too much, to overcome the hit. One time he finds a strange feta cheese package in his shopping bag. He can´t remember to have taken it from the shelf. Nevertheless he opens it, for he loves feta.

As soon as he bites into the cheese, a beautiful young woman materializes. She was hexed by some maniac magic and has to fulfil every desire of the one who tastes the cheese. The man is astonished, but as she is so young and beautiful and smells so tempting fresh, he takes her to bed and they have cosmic sex.

This goes on for some days and it gets even better. She smelles richly now, so alluring, so seductive, he can´t get enough. They fuck 24/7. At one point she asks him, if he could rescue her, by being her partner for the rest of his life. He gladly agrees - its the comming true of all his erotic dreams. They kind of marry in a mystical sex way.

But soon then the cheese grows older. She starts to smell a little strange, then really weird. He has given a promise, so he has to fuck her, even when she becomes soft and doughy and rancid. In the end she is a kind of lepra monster, dissloving in peaces of moldy cheese, but he still has to fulfill her desires and be her sex partner.

He only endures this because he thinks she will be rotten completely very soon. This happens, and he is able to clean away the last stinky parts of her.

But then he notices, that he starts to smell like feta. He is going to change into a feta cheese monster himself...

 

[sirhugs]

You’re in luck! I have an idea for this.

Horace lives alone and someone keeps eating his stuff and leaving it out, especially Feta Cheese. He sets up a camera and he sees an impossibly tall woman slide out from under his refrigerator, crouch over it and take the cheese.

He can’t move due to financial issues so he decides to stop buying her favorite foods in hopes she’ll leave. Instead, he wakes up with her face right in front of his. She asks why he isn’t buying her food. He of course is too scared to answer so she notices his morning wood and offers payment: she’ll have sex with him and help him with anything he needs and all he has to do is feed her.

So a blowjob later and Horace is calmed down enough to talk. The monster, while huge, is still a not bad looking woman. She does smell though as she doesn’t bathe and just eats Feta Cheese.

Horace eventually works out a routine of feeding and fucking his housemate when he meets a new coworker he wants to have a relationship with. The feta monster is happy to help. He leaves the coworker alone, and by thr time he comes back, she’s already dripping and begging to be fucked or already getting it on with the feta cheese monster and begging him to join in.

Of course, the monster’s appetites might be growing past cheese and Horace might need to start bringing more coworkers over to satisfy his monstrous roommate

It held my attention until that awful final twist...

I recently had occasion to see what lives under my fridge, and it was scary indeed.

 

[sirhugs]

Here is another raw sketch for the monster idea:

A lonely guy, left by his last girlfriend, is eating too much and drinking too much, to overcome the hit. One time he finds a strange feta cheese package in his shopping bag. He can´t remember to have taken it from the shelf. Nevertheless he opens it, for he loves feta.

As soon as he bites into the cheese, a beautiful young woman materializes. She was hexed by some maniac magic and has to fulfil every desire of the one who tastes the cheese. The man is astonished, but as she is so young and beautiful and smells so tempting fresh, he takes her to bed and they have cosmic sex.

This goes on for some days and it gets even better. She smelles richly now, so alluring, so seductive, he can´t get enough. They fuck 24/7. At one point she asks him, if he could rescue her, by being her partner for the rest of his life. He gladly agrees - its the comming true of all his erotic dreams. They kind of marry in a mystical sex way.

But soon then the cheese grows older. She starts to smell a little strange, then really weird. He has given a promise, so he has to fuck her, even when she becomes soft and doughy and rancid. In the end she is a kind of lepra monster, dissloving in peaces of moldy cheese, but he still has to fulfill her desires and be her sex partner.

He only endures this because he thinks she will be rotten completely very soon. This happens, and he is able to clean away the last stinky parts of her.

But then he notices, that he starts to smell like feta. He is going to change into a feta cheese monster himself...

how did this jump from sci/fi to horror so fast?

 

[Brandnewbuddy]

It held my attention until that awful final twist...

I recently had occasion to see what lives under my fridge, and it was scary indeed.

Fair enough, simpler is better. She could just be his fuck buddy/stinky wingman

 

[Carnevil9]

You could move the setting to the ancient Egyptian pantheon and make it Horus and the Cheese of the Dead.

 

[Dingo_Triplesix]

I recently had occasion to see what lives under my fridge, and it was scary indeed.

Stop it, please! New ideas are pouring out of my feta brain...

 

[sirhugs]

Stop it, please! New ideas are pouring out of my feta brain...

happy to be of service.

 

[Zionisacat]

You’re in luck! I have an idea for this.

Horace lives alone and someone keeps eating his stuff and leaving it out, especially Feta Cheese. He sets up a camera and he sees an impossibly tall woman slide out from under his refrigerator, crouch over it and take the cheese.

He can’t move due to financial issues so he decides to stop buying her favorite foods in hopes she’ll leave. Instead, he wakes up with her face right in front of his. She asks why he isn’t buying her food. He of course is too scared to answer so she notices his morning wood and offers payment: she’ll have sex with him and help him with anything he needs and all he has to do is feed her.

So a blowjob later and Horace is calmed down enough to talk. The monster, while huge, is still a not bad looking woman. She does smell though as she doesn’t bathe and just eats Feta Cheese.

Horace eventually works out a routine of feeding and fucking his housemate when he meets a new coworker he wants to have a relationship with. The feta monster is happy to help. He leaves the coworker alone, and by thr time he comes back, she’s already dripping and begging to be fucked or already getting it on with the feta cheese monster and begging him to join in.

Of course, the monster’s appetites might be growing past cheese and Horace might need to start bringing more coworkers over to satisfy his monstrous roommate

Of course that's around the time that the dust bunnies underneath the sofa become sentient.

 

[sirhugs]

Of course that's around the time that the dust bunnies underneath the sofa become sentient.

lord knows they get enough popcorn to eat...