Hey Hospital/Medical People. Serious Question, For Real

[jaF0]

There are variations of DNRs, Living Wills, Medical Directives and related documents by state. Which are Iron Clad? Which will result in penalties if facilities or practitioners violate them?

I want to specify that NOTHING be done if I'm not awake and alert to personally approve whatever. And I DO mean NOTHING. Not even a stitch.

If I wake up in a hospital someday and find that I've been in a wreck and I'm now full of pins, screws, metal bars and other bits and won't be able to move for days, weeks or longer, I will be extremely, royally, totally pissed the FUCK off.


I want something in writing that will cause all personnel involved to be jailed or at the least stripped of their licenses.

 

[DoverTomo]

I'm not sure there's a document that can do what you're looking for.

 

[jaF0]

NOBODY speaks for me if I can't. NO ONE.

 

[AmberLGreen]

If I lived closer to you I would give you my details and you could put me as your proxy. I wouldn’t speak but would hold up my hand and shake my head if they tried to medically intervene in anyway. If you were in a wreck and lying in the middle of the road with your cock hanging out, I wouldn’t even let them touch you to put it away. I would encourage any persons around to video the event so if they did medically intervene, there would be evidence of it.

I would be that good of a friend to you even though you are a fucking grumpy ass

 

[Eowyn10]

Too bad. If you are unconscious and they don't find any documentation on your person, they are gonna resuscitate your ass as best they can. The cops or the ED staff may call your emergency contact if someone is listed, but absent that, the medical folks will save your life if they can, and if you get pissy about it, they can intubate you. In the places I've worked, we have a saying, "Doctors can't cure stupid, but we can intubate it and sedate it".

 

[AmberLGreen]

Too bad. If you are unconscious and they don't find any documentation on your person, they are gonna resuscitate your ass as best they can. The cops or the ED staff may call your emergency contact if someone is listed, but absent that, the medical folks will save your life if they can, and if you get pissy about it, they can intubate you. In the places I've worked, we have a saying, "Doctors can't cure stupid, but we can intubate it and sedate it".

Jiffy, you could probably tattoo something like that on your forehead

“Doctors can’t cure stupid so let me fucking die”

 

[Eowyn10]

Jiffy, you could probably tattoo something like that on your forehead

“Doctors can’t cure stupid so let me fucking die”

Tattoo it on your chest, as they may not look at your face, but they'll for damn sure rip your shift off.

 

[ydahecnot]

And maybe the cock too, in case it is indeed hanging out

 

[AmberLGreen]

And maybe the cock too, in case it is indeed hanging out

That could have the small print about jail and loss of licence