Help, Mike_Yates, help!

[warrior queen]

My uncle's gardener's step-daughter's boyfriend's child has cancer - and you are our ONLY HOPE!
Please help by giving us the supersecretmiracle cure for cancer.
We need you, Mike!

 

[clutch1]

This happened to my mailmans cousin.

 

[blobfish]

Don't be a hater.

 

[warrior queen]

For God's sake, Mike...
This is a child I'm talking about!
A CHILD!!!