Help me punish bratty slave

[Ab123456789]

Hi I'm an inexperienced mistress who'll punish my boyfriend/slave during this weekend. However I've never done anything else other than spanking with riding crop which, while being a punishment becomes a bit boring. I'd like your ideas as to how I'll punish him. I've thought about corner time or stress position, but what is the best positions and how long should he stay in position? I've also thought about spanking him more but are there any ways to make it worse and how many swats with the riding crop? Mouthsoaping is something which I've looked into but what is the best way to do it with liquid hand soap (it's as safe as possible) and for how long to do the soaping and keeping the soap in mouth, should he be allowed to rinse? Other things I've thought about is some sort of anal punishment with a hairbrush handle or my fingers, but how should I do it, would soap or hot sauce be able to be used as lube for extra punishment? Could hot sauce be used in other ways as punishment, except for eating? Basically give me any ideas you got both for now and for future use.

The infringements are lying, swearing, acting disrespectful towards me, not doing chores properly/on time masturbating without permission and peeing during bladder holding tasks. These are things which he's done several times and I think he rely deserves a weekend of punishment/hell.

I've also had him create a poll if you'd like to vote http://www.misterpoll.com/polls/616057

 

[Blue]

I dunno, so I'll just give a run-down of psychology that might give you a few ideas. Just as a note; obviously I don't mean the following in a "you should do this-" way nor mean it to be some sort of textbook article for how to "do it properly". Just information you might find useful.

The logic of Operant Conditioning tells me that there are much more effective methods of responding to his behaviour, since he's clearly not abiding by the given framework because he's expecting the response you've laid out here. Meaning that under the established model what you're planning would be 'positive reinforcement'.
'Positive' in contrast to Negative is interpreted as addition/subtraction respectively.
'Reinforcement' contrasted with Punishment is interpreted as increasing/decreasing a certain behaviour respectively.
So 'Positive Reinforcement' translates as 'adding certain stimulus that will increase the frequency of the designated behaviour' which is probably antithetical to the whole control thing. Using 'Negative Punishment' would be the best way to make sure he abides by set rules (albeit harsher than 'positive punishment), so that translates as removing a stimulus to prevent a certain behaviour. The stimulus in question is emotional catharsis/bonding/experience and the behaviour is rule breaking, so not offering a response to the misbehaving (removal of the cause of the stimulus) and instead ignoring it sounds like a good start.

 

[Ab123456789]

I'll keep that in mind however whenever he has broken the rules he has always seemed regretful after and the spanking have left him in tears a couple of times so I really don't think he does it on purpose more like he doesn't push himself enough with things like tasks, but thank you and I'll definitely look out for signs of him enjoying the punishments.

 

[Primalex]

Hi I'm an inexperienced mistress who'll punish my boyfriend/slave during this weekend.

Out of curiosity - why do you think he is submissive?

 

[Ab123456789]

If you're asking about some psychological reason I don't really know but he claims to have had fantasies about being dominated since he was 14-15 years old and hasn't really explored it in real life until now

 

[kcRollins]

Obviously, he's trying to get a rise out of you for the thrill of it so, you might wanna punish him in a way that isn't so thrilling or boring.

Naked, in a squatting position with his hands clasped behind his head, place a coin on the wall and have him hold it there with his nose for at least 5 mins.

He might regret ever being disrespectful again and if he gets outta hand a mere warning of that punishment might get him under control. *shrugs*

 

[Ab123456789]

That's a good idea. As said I'm quite new to all of this but have told him to stand in the corner, he's standing there now.

 

[Primalex]

If you're asking about some psychological reason

No, I'm asking about your relationship.

he claims to have had fantasies about being dominated since he was 14-15 years old and hasn't really explored it in real life until now

And those fantasies are about being punished or are they actually about being used for the sexual pleasure of the woman? What does being dominated mean for him?


Seriously, if your partner is disrespectful to entice funishment (punishment he enjoys), then this is a fairly problematic course in my opinion.

 

[Ab123456789]

No I know that he doesn't act disrespectful just to get punished since his fantasies is to serve woman and follow rules set up by me, though at the same time he hasn't had that much experience with actually being a sub before. Ultimately I believe him breaking the rules is mainly forgetting about them.

 

[MastersDelight]

I'm with Primalex, as a sub and a masochist, punishment has to me more creative than a spanking or something pain inducing. Something humiliating or removal of something I enjoy is far more effective. Are you sure you aren't setting the bar too high for a new submissive and therefore setting him up for failure? Is this something that's 24/7 or not? If it is 24/7 maybe he slips up because he needs some time where he isn't kneeling and can be more relaxed?

If you really are bothered by these behaviors perhaps the worst punishment would be to give him a good verbal dressing down like a child and try to get him to tell you why he can't seem to follow the rules.

 

[Ab123456789]

It's not a 24/7 relation since most of the times when we're with other people the rules are relaxed to just having a polite tone against me and before having the rules in place constantly we did it for a week at a time and gradually increasing it. I might have put the bar a bit high on the tasks and perhaps I shouldn't punish him for it, as said I'm also fairly new to this.

 

[Primalex]

How many of the rules you set up do you actually enjoy (and that do not revolve around getting rid of unpleasant work)?

 

[SpunThings]

I think the best idea would be deal with the underlying reason why he disobeyed first. Maybe the tasks were too hard, or maybe they seemed hotter in fantasy than reality, or maybe he had a problem he had difficulty communicating.

If it's straight up disrespectful disobedience (which it doesn't seem like) then remove fun play until he behaves.

 

[CutieMouse]

If you're asking about some psychological reason I don't really know but he claims to have had fantasies about being dominated since he was 14-15 years old and hasn't really explored it in real life until now

Fantasy isn't always the same as reality.

Fantasy - ZOMG doing everything my goddess girlfriend tells me to makes me so hard! God I bet she'll like tell me to scrub the floor, and stand over me to make sure I do it just right, and I'll be hard as a rock the whole time, and if I do it just right I'll get to do X, but if I do it wrong she'll do Y to me!

Reality - Boyfriend cleans the floor, realizes it isn't sexy, and he isn't rock hard... she wanders through "You missed a spot. Do it again." [Mistress goes back to more important things than watching someone do something everyone should know how to do].

No I know that he doesn't act disrespectful just to get punished since his fantasies is to serve woman and follow rules set up by me, though at the same time he hasn't had that much experience with actually being a sub before. Ultimately I believe him breaking the rules is mainly forgetting about them.

If his fantasy is to "serve woman and follow rules set up by me" then why isn't he doing it? He follows the rules at work, yes? Stops at stoplights, etc, doesn't rob banks? Dude knows HOW to follow rules, he is either unwilling or incapable of doing so within your relationship.

How many "rules" have you incorporated at once? If it's more than one, and you aren't giving the rule proper time (usually a few weeks) to "gel", you're probably doing too much.

You're issues are

lying, swearing, acting disrespectful towards me, not doing chores properly/on time masturbating without permission and peeing during bladder holding tasks

Lying? Excellent reason to end the relationship.


Swearing? Set up a swear jar - he puts in X $$ (that goes to you) every time he cusses.


Acting disrespectful? What does that mean, exactly? You mention that and "tone"... are the two of you on the same page/clearly understanding what "acting disrespectful" means?

Masturbating without permission? Have him research the anti-masturbation movement and write an X page report on it.

Peeing during bladder holding tasks? Is what you're asking reasonable? Physically possible? What's the purpose of him holding his bladder?

It isn't sexy, but attaching logical consequences to poor behavior is a good way to eradicate poor behavior. Save the fun kinky stuff for fun kinky times...

 

[MeekMe]

I think looking at how many rules and tasks you want to implement is important. If he can't remember all of the rules/tasks then he can't abide by them. Slowly introducing tasks and rules can give him time to get used to and execute them. I think what's been suggested is great advice, but make sure the work load is reasonable. Sometimes it's hard to juggle everything while tackling life in general. I know I've struggled with remembering to do certain things while maintaining daily life.

 

[cookiecat]

A weekend of punishment/hell will just be that. In all likelihood, it won't address the specific behavior. Have a fun, kinky weekend instead! And then, when he lies or is disrespectful, swears or whatever act goes against your agreed upon rules, address that specific issue at the time. a within a relatively short time.

This is an older thread about punishment, could be helpful.

http://forum.literotica.com/showthread.php?t=1340604

 

[Miles Long]

You could always make him go to a Nickelback concert.

 

[MeekMe]

You could always make him go to a Nickelback concert.

This goes too far! You're a monster!

 

[Miles Long]

This goes too far! You're a monster!

It is true my brand of sadism is not for everyone.

 

[cookiecat]

You could always make him go to a Nickelback concert.

Miles!!

Perhaps an afternoon of nothing but Fox news.

 

[JoanneA]

Ultimately I believe him breaking the rules is mainly forgetting about them.

All you need to do is change the tone of your voice. Olive oil.

 

[cookiecat]

All you need to do is change the tone of your voice. Olive oil.

What's olive oil? I mean, I know what olive oil is. What does it mean in this context?

 

[JoanneA]

Sounded like she was brining a turkey! For your asshole.

 

[MastersDelight]

Ohhhhh I thought it was a reference to popeyes meek girlfriend Olive oil.

 

[S3xSlav3]

Hi I'm an inexperienced mistress who'll punish my boyfriend/slave during this weekend. However I've never done anything else other than spanking with riding crop which, while being a punishment becomes a bit boring. I'd like your ideas as to how I'll punish him. http://www.misterpoll.com/polls/616057

My master had a great deal of trouble with this as well. For some reason I am pretty good at coming up with ideas but always asking me what my punishment is kinda sucks. So I put them on line and she can randomly pick from them. You can see my list at sexslaveideas.com

A good way to learn your slaves desires is to get them all worked up and then have them make a list of 10 punishments. Ask for a list of the 10 worse things they can image happening or doing and why... Why is key part. You can use the why to come up with your own ideas.

I have had to make a list of 10 fantasies, 10 punishments, 10 embarrassing tasks and I'm sure a few others.


Masturbate on the front porch?
Eating his own cum?
Can not use bathroom inside for 1 week. Outside only.
Walk to the mail box nude?
Wash and wax your car fully nude with garage door open or car outside.