Hard Edge, Sick, Tasteless, or Boring

[tail_teller]

Hard Edge, Sick, Tasteless, or Boring?

Have a look, let me know. Warning: degradation.

http://english.literotica.com/stories/showstory.php?id=262937

Thanks.

[Link is fixed, thanks Sierra!]

 

[SierraMoon]

The link didn't work for me.... but you may be interested to know there is a thread in the cafe for promoting your stories....

https://forum.literotica.com/showthread.php?t=307841

 

[@}-}rebecca----]

Have a look, let me know. Warning: degradation.

http://english.literotica.com/stories/showstory.php?id=262937

Thanks.

Trust me you don't want my opinion in public about the first section I just read.

 

[tail_teller]

hmmm.

Let me guess.

Summary: Sick and Tasteless.



Thanks for having a look. Do you think the warnings are adequate?

If you feel the need to unburden you soul, unlooose your wrath, etc., feel free! I'd like to hear your reasons, more than personal insults, of course. We will stipulate, for the sake of argument that the author is depraved and low life, etc. etc.

 

[Evil_Geoff]

Not my thing, but if it rocks your world, carry on.

 

[satin_coals]

piss slave *laughs* .. i stopped right about there. not for me but hey .. it's for many many others

 

[Let_it_come]

I liked it.
Good Jilling material.
Any more where that came from?
Jen

 

[snowy ciara]

I don't normally read the degradation stuff so I wasn't going to comment. But I read it, because you asked. Before I comment, I have to ask. Are you looking for honest feedback with the possibility that it may be negative? Or are you looking for a pat on the bac? I'm not trying to be rude, but so many people post their "stuff" and then get mad when the response isn't all positive.

 

[tail_teller]

Hi Ciara,

Thanks for the note.

That's a bit of a trick question, "Do you want my honest opinion or do you just want flattery?"

I'd say--without knocking flattery--that any notice is good notice and tends to get the author read, which is what he or she wants.

I will not do violence to myself if you say--as apparently Rebecca wants to-- 'piece of crap.'

The problem, ciara, is that if a reader starts off with "This is disgusting and offensive and a complete turn off" he or she is rather likely to be influenced as to their literary appraisal; either say 'it's bad writing,' or--very commonly-- 'boring.' The latter appraisal reflecting the purported sophistication of the reviewer.

So I'd rather have the literary appraisals from those who are either neutral or positive, as regards the sexual practice. (That is true of lots of bdsm and fetish writers, I'd gues.) Does that exclude you?

BUT. for those who've lost their lunch; sure, fire away. Then I will sort through which I think are actual literary appraisals with substance, and which are merely the window dressing for the feeling of being offended, the desire to denounce, etc.

Besides, I'm curious. Even the offended are often articulate and interesting.

 

[snowy ciara]

Fairynuff...

I don't do really go for humiliation or degradation stories, which is actually a good thing in this case because I'm not as distracted by my libido as another might be. I suppose I qualify as "neutral" because the subject matter doesn't really turn me on or off.

Your writing style is a bit dry, I thought. I like more details and exposition in my reading material. Especially my one handed reading material! I know, it's weird, but plot is really important to me. The actual subject matter is a bit trite and overdone. There's nothing new or unusual or exciting. I wasn't turned on (which I didn't expect, because as I said, it's not my cuppa.) but neither was I disgusted. I was bored.

The thing is, you do have some skill. If you were writing about something that turned me on, and were paying a bit more attention to detail and plot, I'd definately give you another read.

 

[catalina_francisco]

Fairynuff...

I don't do really go for humiliation or degradation stories, which is actually a good thing in this case because I'm not as distracted by my libido as another might be. I suppose I qualify as "neutral" because the subject matter doesn't really turn me on or off.

Your writing style is a bit dry, I thought. I like more details and exposition in my reading material. Especially my one handed reading material! I know, it's weird, but plot is really important to me. The actual subject matter is a bit trite and overdone. There's nothing new or unusual or exciting. I wasn't turned on (which I didn't expect, because as I said, it's not my cuppa.) but neither was I disgusted. I was bored.

The thing is, you do have some skill. If you were writing about something that turned me on, and were paying a bit more attention to detail and plot, I'd definately give you another read.

You basically said it for me in terms of plot and interestingness. My feeling was it needed to lead the reader much more into the story, giving the feel of being there if not actually part of what was happening, but that is how I like to write and read. For me it seemed more about getting to the point quickly, getting it out there, and hoping that would work to distract and carry the interest, which for me it didn't.

Catalina

 

[snowy ciara]

Thanks Catalina.

 

[tail_teller]

thanks, ciara,

i think your points are mostly well taken.

you might have alook a my other effort, much more detailed.

"proud"
http://english.literotica.com/stories/showstory.php?id=114752

i do disagree with your calling the subject matter 'trite', since i know of scarcely any stories of a similar ilk. but as to details, that is probably a valid point, imo.

thanks.

 

[snowy ciara]

You're welcome.

Re: the trite comment, there isn't a lot of it on Lit, but it's a staple of bad porn sites and books. I'd say about half of the books in the (rather large) library at the local club have a similar "piss puppy" character in them. The only change appears to be gender.

 

[@}-}rebecca----]

Thanks for the note.

That's a bit of a trick question, "Do you want my honest opinion or do you just want flattery?"

I'd say--without knocking flattery--that any notice is good notice and tends to get the author read, which is what he or she wants.

I will not do violence to myself if you say--as apparently Rebecca wants to-- 'piece of crap.'

The problem, ciara, is that if a reader starts off with "This is disgusting and offensive and a complete turn off" he or she is rather likely to be influenced as to their literary appraisal; either say 'it's bad writing,' or--very commonly-- 'boring.' The latter appraisal reflecting the purported sophistication of the reviewer.

So I'd rather have the literary appraisals from those who are either neutral or positive, as regards the sexual practice. (That is true of lots of bdsm and fetish writers, I'd gues.) Does that exclude you?

BUT. for those who've lost their lunch; sure, fire away. Then I will sort through which I think are actual literary appraisals with substance, and which are merely the window dressing for the feeling of being offended, the desire to denounce, etc.

Besides, I'm curious. Even the offended are often articulate and interesting.

Anyone who is familiar with the way I project myself when I write posts here on the Board know I would never have used the terminology you have eluded to in the sentance I have highlighted above.

Interesting to me is Miss Snowy has used the exact same word I did use in the intial 2nd and only other comment I made before I edited my post to 'tone it down' . I had also commented the content was 'trite'.

It may also be wise to consider the same Community avails itself of both the Cafe and Talk Sections of the Board and the following was unlikely to go past without notice.

https://forum.literotica.com/showpost.php?p=18251293&postcount=138

@}-}rebecca-----

 

[shy slave]

I read it and it a brief statement I can say i was bored rigid.

The humiliation was tame and the pissing unrealistic.

On a further note, I see when you snuck this link into another thread you commented it had so far had little response in the cafe. Richards only comment was his old chestnut of stating he dislikes there being two boards to post on.

However there are two boards, we are not dumb, we can see that you want to highlight your story and there is a 'shameless plug thread' for people who want to tell everyone they have a new story out.

Personally when I want to read a story I go directly to that part of the site and make a search I don't like being ambushed on the boards.

Especially when the story lacks so many levels of realism

 

[tail_teller]

Shy Slave says, agreeing with Rebecca,

On a further note, I see when you snuck this link into another thread you commented it had so far had little response in the cafe. Richards only comment was his old chestnut of stating he dislikes there being two boards to post on.

However there are two boards, we are not dumb, we can see that you want to highlight your story and there is a 'shameless plug thread' for people who want to tell everyone they have a new story out.

A capital crime indeed!

I don't like being ambushed on the boards.

So sorry! Hope you've recovered.

it a brief statement I can say i was bored rigid.

Thanks for the feedback! Enjoy your weekend.




====
ss's posting:

I read it and it a brief statement I can say i was bored rigid.

The humiliation was tame and the pissing unrealistic.

On a further note, I see when you snuck this link into another thread you commented it had so far had little response in the cafe. Richards only comment was his old chestnut of stating he dislikes there being two boards to post on.

However there are two boards, we are not dumb, we can see that you want to highlight your story and there is a 'shameless plug thread' for people who want to tell everyone they have a new story out.

Personally when I want to read a story I go directly to that part of the site and make a search I don't like being ambushed on the boards.

Especially when the story lacks so many levels of realism

 

[@}-}rebecca----]

Are you an Alt.............?

 

[shy slave]

Are you an Alt.............?

No I am me...you know me.....I am shy slave






Ohhhh did you mean tail_teller???




I was wondering about them, what does their tail tell??

And do they mean 'tail' as in their cock/ass or someother type of tail???

Life is complicated sometimes

*sigh*

 

[A Desert Rose]

Are you an Alt.............?

Why yes, Yes I am...

I am he as you are he as you are me and we are all together.

I am the eggman, they are the eggmen.
I am the walrus, goo goo g'joob.

 

[@}-}rebecca----]

No I am me...you know me.....I am shy slave

Ohhhh did you mean tail_teller???

I was wondering about them, what does their tail tell??

And do they mean 'tail' as in their cock/ass or someother type of tail???

Life is complicated sometimes

*sigh*

Noooooooooo I know thats you Miss Shy.........Cindy Brady was a tale teller......smiles

 

[@}-}rebecca----]

Why yes, Yes I am...

I am he as you are he as you are me and we are all together.

I am the eggman, they are the eggmen.
I am the walrus, goo goo g'joob.

LMAO You Nut Miss Rose.........all this time and your an Alt as well..........sighs

 

[A Desert Rose]

Noooooooooo I know thats you Miss Shy.........Cindy Brady was a tale teller......smiles

Cindy Brady was a tattle tale... not a tale teller. LMAO

 

[@}-}rebecca----]

Cindy Brady was a tattle tale... not a tale teller. LMAO

ohhhhh chite what can I say I am after all Australian ........smiles endearingly ....hope your buying this Miss Rose

 

[A Desert Rose]

ohhhhh chite what can I say I am after all Australian ........smiles endearingly ....hope your buying this Miss Rose

Yea well, it's all about Marsha anyway...

Marsha
Marsha
Marsha

whine
whine
whine

;D