Ghis (closed)

[KieranSoares]

"Worried?" Ciaran raised an eyebrow as he smoothed his short dark hair. "It's because I'm not interested in becoming King, isn't it?" he sighed and straightened his tunic as he was ever aware of his appearance. His well-composed image was what stole many girls' hearts, but he never seemed to have any interest in them.

 

[heartofcourage]

"Ciaran, it's your birth right." She said softly, knowing that her son could get sensitive about the subject. "My love, you know that your father adores you. He has since the day that you were born. It hurts him that you won't talk to him."

She pulled them to a stop and reached out to touch his cheek, turning his attention towards her. "I know your father and you don't always see eye to eye, but it would mean the world to both of us if you made the effort to at least get to know about his interests. If not for him, then for me, Ciaran."

 

[KieranSoares]

"I have tried," Ciaran told her. "I've spent weeks at a time trying to get interested in strategy and politics, but... it's just not who I am, Ma. I just want to work in the garden and the kitchen, and work with the horses. I just wasn't meant to be Crown Prince. You have no idea how much I envy even the kitchen maids and the stable hands sometimes..."

Ciaran shook his head, "I just... I wish I had the courage to tell Dad that, but... he'd either hate me or he'd be crushed. I..." There was more he wished he could say, but he just couldn't.

 

[heartofcourage]

"Oh, Ciaran...he won't hate you, love." Julia said softly, giving his hand a squeeze. "Your Da loves you and wants what's best for you. If he didn't think that you could be King one day, he wouldn't have given you the title of Crowned Prince."

Julia let out a long sigh as she touched her son's cheek in a loving gesture. "I think you need to talk to him, my heart. Talk to him like the adult that you are and simply tell him what you feel. He's down fishing at the loch today. Why not go and see him?"

 

[KieranSoares]

"No... No, he won't understand. It's so much more than just a lack of interest, Ma... Just..." He shook his head and turned away from her. If there was anyone he'd tell everything to, it was Julia. But now, he seemed afraid to speak. "I'm gonna go change for dinner..." He went on his way to head back inside. It was her first glimpse into a pain she'd never known that her son had been feeling, and it seemed to be a deep, long-term pain he'd been hiding for a very, very long time.

 

[heartofcourage]

Julia's heart broke as she watched Ciaran head back inside of the keep. She had never seen her little boy in such pain. He had a secret that was eating him from the inside out and there was nothing she could do to stop it. She felt sick to her stomach and so much older than her years as she followed after him a short time later. Finding a spot in her chambers, she sat on one of Brogan's plush armchairs, willing the churning of her stomach to go away.

Dozing for a while, she woke when she heard the door open and she turned her head to see Brogan return from him from his time at the loch. She tried to smile for him, but the worry was still etched on her face.

"I spoke with Ciaran today." She said softly as she lifted her hand for her husband to take. "Oh, love, I've never seen someone hurting so much."

 

[KieranSoares]

Brogan knelt at her side as he took her hand, his dark brows stitching in concern. "What's wrong with 'im? Wha's 'appened?" He reached up to touch her cheek, hoping that it wasn't as serious as he was afraid it might be.

But before she could answer, Rhodan poked his head in. "Da! Sam's bein' mean to me!"

"Sam!" Brogan growled, rising to his feet. The other twin peered in slowly. "Y'better shape up now, lad, I've told ya tha' y'can play around, but y'can't be mean t'yer brother, y'hear me?"

"Yes, sir..." Sam answered quietly.

"Now both o' ya go get cleaned up fer dinner, no more foolin' about. Yer Ma told ya t'behave tonight."

Both boys hurried to do as he said before Brogan looked back to Julia.

 

[heartofcourage]

"He won't tell me, love." Julia said after the twins had disappeared. "He's so afraid to talk to you. He told me that he's afraid of hurting you or making you upset. Brogan, I've never seen him this way before. I know that the two of you have had your differences, but I told him that he would never hurt you."

She let out a sigh as his hand touched her cheek, trying to alleviate the worry that she felt. "Would you talk to him, love? And just remember that he's our baby boy and we need to help him any way that we can."

 

[KieranSoares]

"O' course. I'll talk with 'im after dinner." Brogan drew her to her feet and kissed her lips lightly. "Why don' you get ready fer dinner, aye? I need t'talk with Kate fer a minute." He soon left her to go find his daughter.

 

[heartofcourage]

"Of course, love." Julia said softly as he kissed her and said that he needed to go find Kate.

Kate was in her room, dressed in the gown that her grandmother had given her for Christmas. It was green, beautiful, made just for her, but she looked so miserable and uncomfortable as a knock sounded at her door and she looked over her shoulder.

"Come in." She called out with a sigh, picking up her brush to try and tame her thick fiery red locks.

 

[KieranSoares]

Brogan pushed open the door and smiled at his daughter. "Y'look absolutely beautiful, darlin'." He came to her side and took the brush, running it through her hair easily. He'd always somehow been able to tame her hair perfectly.

 

[heartofcourage]

"Da, you said you'd talk to Ma about the whole dress thing." Kate groused as her father easily tamed the curly locks of her hair. "She knows I don't like to wear them, but she insists every time we have a family meal. Aunt Val and Selena don't have to wear them."

 

[KieranSoares]

"Val is a workin' woman along with Theo, y' know that. And Selena is a huntress. They wear dresses on special occasions, though. Not to mention, they're fully grown, adult women. As long as yer under eighteen, you'll 'ave t' listen to yer mother."

He knelt beside her, wrapping his arms around her waist. "My li'l beauty..."

 

[heartofcourage]

Kate adored her father and when he hugged her tightly, she rested her head against his shoulder, hugging him back. "I guess it makes Ma happy, huh?" She murmured as she let out a long sigh. "It's a small price to pay for her to be happy."

"Can we go hunting tomorrow, Da? Just the two of us like we use to?" She asked him, pulling her head back from his shoulder and giving him a little mischievous smile.

 

[KieranSoares]

"O' course, lass," Brogan nodded as he finished taming her hair. "Ye've always been such a good girl fer me... An' y'always think o' yer Ma's happiness above all. I'm proud o' you, Kate." He then took her hand and walked with her to the great hall but when he arrived, he paused and looked around. "Where's Ciaran...?"

Ciaran had avoided all finding, knowing Brogan would want to talk to him. Brogan looked down at Kate, knowing that Ciaran shared everything with her. "Kate... wha's goin' on with Ciaran?"

She knew, but he'd sworn her to secrecy after she'd caught him with his love, a broad male werewolf by the name of Lir. Not only was he terrified he'd be disowned for being in love with a man, he also knew that most humans still feared or hated werewolves and might hurt Lir, especially Brogan.

 

[heartofcourage]

"Da, I can't tell you. It's something that Ciaran has to tell you himself." Kate insisted, looking up at her Da's concerned look. "He's probably out at his camp in the woods...even though Ma told him to be here tonight. She'll be heartbroken."

True enough, when Julia entered the great hall and saw that Ciaran was not there, she was disappointed. Still, she tried not to let it show as she welcomed the family into the keep for a long over due family dinner.

 

[KieranSoares]

There were questions, of course, about Ciaran's absence, but Brogan insisted that he wasn't feeling well and was asleep. Brogan sat down beside Julia and took her hand, leaning in to whisper, "I want ya t'come with me t'talk to Ciaran after dinner. 'E's more comfortable talkin' t'you. Kate knows wha's wrong, but she says it's somethin' only Ciaran can tell us."

 

[heartofcourage]

Julia nodded, knowing that something was seriously wrong with her son. He never missed a family dinner, especially one that she had requested that he be at. Most of the family left later in the night, Annie and David being the only two that stayed late to chat with Kitty and Vincenzo. Kate had been given her leave to change out of the dreaded dress and the twins ran off for more mischief. Julia wrapped up in a warm cloak and took Brogan's hand, allowing him to lead the way to Ciaran's forest camp.

"Just remember to keep a level head, love. He's scared." Julia said softly, squeezing her husband's hand as they walked through the woods.

 

[KieranSoares]

"I think I'm a li'l too worried about 'im t'be angry," Brogan told her. "What could 'e possibly be so scared about...?"

They soon found the camp, the fire blazing with quiet crackles, and Ciaran was sitting on a stump near it in the fine suit he would've worn to dinner. He'd lost his nerve at the last moment and ran without changing. He had a small tent set up in case of rain, and a soft sleeping mat within along with a few canteens of water and some fruit he kept around for the days he spent studying plants in the forest.

He heard Brogan's heavy boots, and he quickly stood up, not sure who was coming. But when he saw his parents, he went pale. He couldn't run from them anymore without genuinely running away from home.

"Ciaran." Brogan stepped into the firelight, and Ciaran was physically trembling. "Son... wha's goin' on? Why're ya so scared?"

Ciaran swallowed hard, and just couldn't answer. He was genuinely terrified that his father would truly kill him, hurt him, disown him, exile... so many possibilities.

 

[heartofcourage]

Julia could see the fear in her son's eyes and her heart broke. She had never seen him so scared, not even when he was a toddler. She quickly let go of Brogan's hand and hurried forward to comfort her son, taking his broad shoulder into her arms and hugging him tightly. He was much taller than her but she still felt the need to protect him for the world around them.

"My heart, tell us what's wrong. You've been acting so strange lately." She coaxed him, her green eyes looking into his, imploring him to come clean and tell the truth.

 

[KieranSoares]

"I can't..." Ciaran whispered, his eyes locked on Brogan, who he feared the most. His father's religion didn't forbid what he did, but society did and Ciaran knew his father didn't approve of it. He also feared his mother's reaction, knowing that homosexuality was punishable by death among Christians.

"Then a' least say why y'can't tell us," Brogan encouraged softly.

"You'll... you'll kill me, or exile me..."

"Ciaran..." Brogan shook his head.

 

[heartofcourage]

"Ciaran, please..." Julia begged her son, tears starting to roll down her cheeks as she watched the turmoil in her son's eyes. "We just want to help you, love. You need to tell us what's wrong."

 

[KieranSoares]

Ciaran looked between the two of them, and he finally whispered, "I... I'm in love with a man..."

Brogan's breath hitched in his throat as he stared in shock at his eldest son. He couldn't speak, he could hardly breathe. His son was gay...?

Ciaran was too afraid to speak, waiting to be struck, to be yelled at.

 

[heartofcourage]

Julia was stunned and she glanced over at Brogan to see how he was taking the sudden admission. When she glanced back at Ciaran, she could see the very real fear in his eyes and she simply hugged him that much tighter.

"My heart, it doesn't matter to me what you are. You're my baby boy and I want you to be happy." She murmured, her eyes closing as she rested her cheek against his broad shoulder. "I thought all this time you were upset over something else. This isn't anything to be worried about. Your father and I love you."

 

[KieranSoares]

Even though Ciaran felt a small bit of relief that his mother was accepting, his eyes were still trained on Brogan. After a long silence, he finally whispered, "... Da...?"

Brogan shook his head slowly. "I'm... I need... I need some time..." He turned away and disappeared into the forest. Tears filled Ciaran's eyes at Brogan's pained and confused expression, and he clung to his mother tightly, finally letting himself cry out his fear and pain at being a disappointment to his family.