rbone04
Literotica Guru
- Joined
- Aug 25, 2006
- Posts
- 643
Although I don't post as often as I should, I have finally reached my breaking-point. After years of wasting my time lurking through endless threads on some variation of:
Do women really care about size? or...
Is my dick big enough? or...
How can I make my dick bigger?
Beware, it's lengthy, but I am making an attempt to resolve this silly matter once and for all. Sure, it's been a concern for all men probably ever since the first magnificent discovery that sex was more than just procreation's creative way; and it's perhaps one reason the same mundane threads keep popping up fresh every day on every sex forum on the internet. This obviously isn't only for the beloved GLBT community and could probably fit within every forum on the discussion board, but I rarely read any others so you guys are stuck with it.
Now granted, forum veterans would argue that a quick search from those seeking answers before starting a thread would save us all a lot of time; but I must admit that, until recently, I feel we are all guilty of being unable to provide in-depth insight that might just be the reassurance us self-conscious men need. Some of you will certainly disagree (size queens are unexplainable exceptions to the rules, lets face it... they need big dicks and there's nothing we can do about it). But, I think the vast majority of us can relate. You "big boys" might just learn something from this too. Here goes nothing.
I'm a 25 year old bisexual male, and I've always been overly concerned about my cock size - (exactly 5 inches and if I'm "by myself" and the thickness is nothing to write home about, but it seems to get closer to 5.5 or 6 inches when I'm with a partner and REALLY turned on).
Personally, when I'm with a man (or woman with fun toys), I do prefer to be on the receiving end of a large (sometimes VERY large) cock/strap-on/etc. I've always assumed this desire probably stems from the fact that my "being-a-bottom-side" is purely sexual... Basically, I don't think I could be be EMOTIONALLY involved with a man and would be completely happy with a woman who didn't participate in my bisexuality.
(1) My "size fetish" is a VERY small component of my sexual resume. For the sake of THIS conversation, that's enough about me taking it in the ass (
I know, I know... we can talk more about that some other time), but I certainly don't NEED it for a very happy and very satisfying sex-life.
All that said, my bisexual "research" has given some evidence-based reasoning for why I've always assumed that (for the most part) straight women get their emotional pleasure from men and hence, physical pleasure from "the dick" - well, the bigger the better right?. I guess I just figured lesbians were an anomaly.
Remember, "I've always been overly concerned about my cock size" despite the fact that most of the women I've had sex with seem (and occasionally claim) to be enjoying themselves.
(2) It helps that I am able to suppress my self-consciousness.
BUT... just yesterday I had a ground-breaking conversation with my girlfriend that has completely changed my perspective!
You see, we were having sex a few days ago and in between moans she said "I think you have the perfect size dick for me" - along with a few other naughty things about how good it feels, etc. Naturally, I just passed that off as her trying to boost my confidence. Shortly thereafter, she may or may not have had an orgasm. I DEFINITELY did.
(3) Cock size aside, women are turned on by confident men.
Now for yesterday's conversation... Being well aware of the fact that she has been with MUCH larger men, I somehow (can't remember exactly) sparked up a conversation about cock size. Now this isn't really anything new, but she told me that many of her experiences with "big" guys were sometimes flat-out painful. Furthermore, just because they had a big cock they thought they could just wail away without putting any more effort into REALLY pleasing her. Now she admits having had "well-hung" exceptions, but she strongly emphasized that those guys put their ego aside and focused on her.
My girl is among the STAGGERING percentage of women who can rarely - if ever - achieve climax from intercourse alone. She takes a LOT of prep work (and many times a "post-game" encore).
(4) For God's sake... learn to love and be damn good at eating pussy!!!
(5) Guys who "don't do that" are fucking insane, and women who "don't like it" haven't had it done right!
(6) Having a hot, wet pussy at your tongue's mercy and watching a woman convulse and cum uncontrollably hard while barely hearing her screams cause her legs are pressed so hard against your head has GOT to be more empowering than mindlessly impaling her with a huge cock!
Sorry, I love eating pussy.
Now she is a blunt chick, and she even went so far as to tell me that:
(a) She thinks faking it is "fucking pointless" cause it just encourages her partner get away with being a shitty lover and...
(b) She has only had orgasms during sex with someone (big or small) that she has actually at least somewhat cared about. This is including "little" ole me, and guys even smaller for that matter!
And finally the "groundbreaking" part (for me anyways)...
(c) The only pleasure she has ever gotten from a big dick, as being nothing more than a body part, is being able to briefly gossip with her girlfriends about some guy having a huge cock. She reminded me that she has a hard enough time getting off with sex alone, so there's NO WAY some chit-chatting and little giggling over a bottle of wine on girls night would do the trick.
Last time I checked fellas, bragging rites alone never gave a woman an earth-shattering orgasm.
Now after the wine... that's another story altogether. And, in that story there was plenty of "getting off" that didn't even involve a dick, no-less!
Now ladies, correct me if I'm wrong here, but the way I see it, especially now - women are turned on by MANY different things, and a dick inside them is just one of MANY of these things. Having confidence in your ability to use ALL of a woman's turn ons is the first step to getting her off. And (if you are on the small side especially), confidence comes from (1) being able to get over whatever she could be thinking about your dick size and (2) knowing that if you're turning her on in every way without wielding a beefy cock, she's probably thinking about how fucking turned on she is first and foremost.
Being a whiny little bitch about the fact that your God-given cock that isn't quite where you'd like it to be on the yard stick is not helping your confidence. And if my understanding is correct, women aren't really turned on by whiny little bitches with a baby dick.
She could very well think it's tiny and that kind of sucks, but fuck it... cause if you focus on the millions of other things that feel amazing to a woman and are damn good at them... I've got a feeling your cock size isn't gonna be the focus of her girly gossip any more. Compare that to the sucker with a huge cock and an ego to match - it's gonna take her a lot more time to brag and be a lot juicier when she tells her friends about all the things you did to her that blew her mind.
Now if you do have a small cock AND completely suck at the millions of other things that feel amazing to a woman, probably as a result of you spending all your time obsessing about your "inadequacies", when you could be actively learning what women want and how to become a better lover... then yeah, she'll probably be making fun of your pathetic little dick and laughing about how much of a pussy you are with ALL her friends for hours.
Don't be that guy! Small cock, big cock, it doesn't matter if you don't have the consideration or bother taking the time to learn how to please a woman. You can't learn how to become a guy with a bigger dick... get over it, you'll have what you have FOREVER. Try focusing on something you can control, and at least give yourself a shot at not being doomed to an unfulfilled and utterly depressing sex life.
Do women really care about size? or...
Is my dick big enough? or...
How can I make my dick bigger?
Beware, it's lengthy, but I am making an attempt to resolve this silly matter once and for all. Sure, it's been a concern for all men probably ever since the first magnificent discovery that sex was more than just procreation's creative way; and it's perhaps one reason the same mundane threads keep popping up fresh every day on every sex forum on the internet. This obviously isn't only for the beloved GLBT community and could probably fit within every forum on the discussion board, but I rarely read any others so you guys are stuck with it.
Now granted, forum veterans would argue that a quick search from those seeking answers before starting a thread would save us all a lot of time; but I must admit that, until recently, I feel we are all guilty of being unable to provide in-depth insight that might just be the reassurance us self-conscious men need. Some of you will certainly disagree (size queens are unexplainable exceptions to the rules, lets face it... they need big dicks and there's nothing we can do about it). But, I think the vast majority of us can relate. You "big boys" might just learn something from this too. Here goes nothing.
I'm a 25 year old bisexual male, and I've always been overly concerned about my cock size - (exactly 5 inches and if I'm "by myself" and the thickness is nothing to write home about, but it seems to get closer to 5.5 or 6 inches when I'm with a partner and REALLY turned on).
Personally, when I'm with a man (or woman with fun toys), I do prefer to be on the receiving end of a large (sometimes VERY large) cock/strap-on/etc. I've always assumed this desire probably stems from the fact that my "being-a-bottom-side" is purely sexual... Basically, I don't think I could be be EMOTIONALLY involved with a man and would be completely happy with a woman who didn't participate in my bisexuality.
(1) My "size fetish" is a VERY small component of my sexual resume. For the sake of THIS conversation, that's enough about me taking it in the ass (
I know, I know... we can talk more about that some other time), but I certainly don't NEED it for a very happy and very satisfying sex-life.All that said, my bisexual "research" has given some evidence-based reasoning for why I've always assumed that (for the most part) straight women get their emotional pleasure from men and hence, physical pleasure from "the dick" - well, the bigger the better right?. I guess I just figured lesbians were an anomaly.
Remember, "I've always been overly concerned about my cock size" despite the fact that most of the women I've had sex with seem (and occasionally claim) to be enjoying themselves.
(2) It helps that I am able to suppress my self-consciousness.
BUT... just yesterday I had a ground-breaking conversation with my girlfriend that has completely changed my perspective!
You see, we were having sex a few days ago and in between moans she said "I think you have the perfect size dick for me" - along with a few other naughty things about how good it feels, etc. Naturally, I just passed that off as her trying to boost my confidence. Shortly thereafter, she may or may not have had an orgasm. I DEFINITELY did.
(3) Cock size aside, women are turned on by confident men.
Now for yesterday's conversation... Being well aware of the fact that she has been with MUCH larger men, I somehow (can't remember exactly) sparked up a conversation about cock size. Now this isn't really anything new, but she told me that many of her experiences with "big" guys were sometimes flat-out painful. Furthermore, just because they had a big cock they thought they could just wail away without putting any more effort into REALLY pleasing her. Now she admits having had "well-hung" exceptions, but she strongly emphasized that those guys put their ego aside and focused on her.
My girl is among the STAGGERING percentage of women who can rarely - if ever - achieve climax from intercourse alone. She takes a LOT of prep work (and many times a "post-game" encore).
(4) For God's sake... learn to love and be damn good at eating pussy!!!
(5) Guys who "don't do that" are fucking insane, and women who "don't like it" haven't had it done right!
(6) Having a hot, wet pussy at your tongue's mercy and watching a woman convulse and cum uncontrollably hard while barely hearing her screams cause her legs are pressed so hard against your head has GOT to be more empowering than mindlessly impaling her with a huge cock!
Sorry, I love eating pussy.
Now she is a blunt chick, and she even went so far as to tell me that:
(a) She thinks faking it is "fucking pointless" cause it just encourages her partner get away with being a shitty lover and...
(b) She has only had orgasms during sex with someone (big or small) that she has actually at least somewhat cared about. This is including "little" ole me, and guys even smaller for that matter!
And finally the "groundbreaking" part (for me anyways)...
(c) The only pleasure she has ever gotten from a big dick, as being nothing more than a body part, is being able to briefly gossip with her girlfriends about some guy having a huge cock. She reminded me that she has a hard enough time getting off with sex alone, so there's NO WAY some chit-chatting and little giggling over a bottle of wine on girls night would do the trick.
Last time I checked fellas, bragging rites alone never gave a woman an earth-shattering orgasm.
Now after the wine... that's another story altogether
. And, in that story there was plenty of "getting off" that didn't even involve a dick, no-less!Now ladies, correct me if I'm wrong here, but the way I see it, especially now - women are turned on by MANY different things, and a dick inside them is just one of MANY of these things. Having confidence in your ability to use ALL of a woman's turn ons is the first step to getting her off. And (if you are on the small side especially), confidence comes from (1) being able to get over whatever she could be thinking about your dick size and (2) knowing that if you're turning her on in every way without wielding a beefy cock, she's probably thinking about how fucking turned on she is first and foremost.
Being a whiny little bitch about the fact that your God-given cock that isn't quite where you'd like it to be on the yard stick is not helping your confidence. And if my understanding is correct, women aren't really turned on by whiny little bitches with a baby dick.
She could very well think it's tiny and that kind of sucks, but fuck it... cause if you focus on the millions of other things that feel amazing to a woman and are damn good at them... I've got a feeling your cock size isn't gonna be the focus of her girly gossip any more. Compare that to the sucker with a huge cock and an ego to match - it's gonna take her a lot more time to brag and be a lot juicier when she tells her friends about all the things you did to her that blew her mind.
Now if you do have a small cock AND completely suck at the millions of other things that feel amazing to a woman, probably as a result of you spending all your time obsessing about your "inadequacies", when you could be actively learning what women want and how to become a better lover... then yeah, she'll probably be making fun of your pathetic little dick and laughing about how much of a pussy you are with ALL her friends for hours.
Don't be that guy! Small cock, big cock, it doesn't matter if you don't have the consideration or bother taking the time to learn how to please a woman. You can't learn how to become a guy with a bigger dick... get over it, you'll have what you have FOREVER. Try focusing on something you can control, and at least give yourself a shot at not being doomed to an unfulfilled and utterly depressing sex life.
