Gender Bending

[Shankara20]

...

I think the best description given to me from some friends and my husband was that I was a gay man trapped in a female body. This I could understand!

...
~kierae

cool - great line

 

[Shankara20]

Yet more proof I am most solidly prissy- that was a really violent, gross, and icky movie. Ew.

(But for the record, I'm not anywhere *near* in a mental place to tolerate chick flicks these days, either. They're all romantic and lovely dovey and awwwwww the great big bad issue/problem/soul searing divide was solved with a snap of the figers... blech. Pardon me whilst I retch quietly into my handbag.)

LOL!!

 

[Betticus]

I'm just a big tease.

I've always been very comfortable around people of all gender types and associations. The only people I don't like being around are the ones that stuff themselves into shoebox stereotypes.

The typical bigot, ub3r christian, straightlaced businessman, etc...

Blech!

 

[Betticus]

Boobies!
Even the gayest of the gay men I know love boobies.

Oh how I love the bewbiez! *pant*

 

[Shankara20]

....people who don't fit society's gender norms are oh so fascinating. (People in general are fascinating. I <3 sociology.)

I suspect Lit will be a fun place for you then, welcome

 

[Betticus]

I suspect Lit will be a fun place for you then, welcome

OMG! I thought for a moment that said "scientology" instead of "sociology".

duh

 

[Shankara20]

Postscript to my post - most of the angst I had about my gender identification was over a few years ago, and now I'm basically just having fun as a weird queer-ass female person. But, I actually just got over one of the last humps - from merely accepting my body to totally loving my body in all its weird femaleness - a few months ago on a magic mushroom trip. I had a holy showering experience and completely fell in love with my own boobs.

Psilocybin - better than years of therapy!
.

Direct gnostic experience - these is no better teacher IMHO

 

[Shankara20]

OMG! I thought for a moment that said "scientology" instead of "sociology".

duh

settle down - once you read "boobies" your mind just went to hell....

 

[amadaun]

Boobies!
Even the gayest of the gay men I know love boobies.

Not sayin' I didn't love other people's boobies. I would be the first to call for an International Moment of Boob Appreciation Silence. (well, maybe not quite the first, but you get the idea).

My own, however? Ridiculous lumps of fat, taking over my chest like a cancer that I was supposed to embrace and cradle with garnments of mandatory femininity. 'Twas a sexy, sexy cancer they turned out to be.

 

[Netzach]

Not sayin' I didn't love other people's boobies. I would be the first to call for an International Moment of Boob Appreciation Silence. (well, maybe not quite the first, but you get the idea).

My own, however? Ridiculous lumps of fat, taking over my chest like a cancer that I was supposed to embrace and cradle with garnments of mandatory femininity. 'Twas a sexy, sexy cancer they turned out to be.

OMG, are you my friend R? I can literally hear her saying that. She only loves them when I force-femme her into Gothic drag.

 

[SpectreT]

Yet more proof I am most solidly prissy- that was a really violent, gross, and icky movie. Ew.

(But for the record, I'm not anywhere *near* in a mental place to tolerate chick flicks these days, either. They're all romantic and lovely dovey and awwwwww the great big bad issue/problem/soul searing divide was solved with a snap of the figers... blech. Pardon me whilst I retch quietly into my handbag.)

Never seen the movie. Read the book, and was just barely halfway through it when the "twist" revealed itself to me. If the movie was anywhere near as violent as the book, it should've garnered an NC-17 rating. IIRC, it got an R, so I have to assume it was toned down quite a bit.

And thanks for at least partially backing up my theory about "chick flicks".

 

[SpectreT]

oh god I wish I had the ass to dress like that...

*sigh*




and chance red heals?



.

...Don't the heels enhance the ass? I know they do amazing things with the line of calves, but I thought they boosted the bum a bit as well. It's not going to give the assless a big ol' bubble, but it'll add some definition. The rest of the trick is in the jeans.

 

[Etoile]

I saw one of those plastic surgery shows recently where a woman had buttock implants inserted. She was already a model and she felt her butt was too flat.

 

[Cheshire D]

I suspect Lit will be a fun place for you then, welcome

*blush* Oh, it is. Between this and the furry communities I lurk at, plus when I people-watch among the mundanes/vanilla people, my head has practically a-sploded in joy, seeing all different sub-groups within society (and how society treats them).

 

[CutieMouse]

oh god I wish I had the ass to dress like that...

*sigh*




and chance red heals?



.

Nope; I've always been too practical to buy red shoes.

Daily wear tends to be either:
4" stilettos in bone
3½" ankle strap stilettos in black (cute bows on the vamp, too)
3" knee high black boots
3" brown strappy sandals (summer wear)
brown leather clogs (my "eh I'm not feeling like myself" shoes)

I drool over shoes, and would eagerly own a housefull, if it wasn't for silly things like rent, car payments, food, kitty litter, electricity...

Fetishy ones are:
4" clear smoke vinyl stilettos with a round babydoll toe
6" black patent oxfords- that are almost never worn, lest I break an ankle.
2½" chunky heel black patent Mary Janes (which cause me to trip almost as much as the 6" heels. For some reason I've never figured out how to be graceful in low heels...)

In general, I think heels make one's rear end look better, but a lot of that comes down to the cut of the clothing. There are all sorts of tricks with regards to pants (especially with jeans) for how to enhance what you have, and minimize what you dislike.

 

[Etoile]

Fetishy ones are:
4" clear smoke vinyl stilettos with a round babydoll toe
6" black patent oxfords- that are almost never worn, lest I break an ankle.
2½" chunky heel black patent Mary Janes (which cause me to trip almost as much as the 6" heels. For some reason I've never figured out how to be graceful in low heels...)

I have vinyl stilettos with a babydoll toe too! Mine are solid black with an ankle strap, the heel is something like 6-7" but there's a 2" platform so it's really more like 4-5". Unfortunately that platform trips me up so I usually only wear them on my back...

Are your oxfords something like this? I looooove stiletto oxfords.
http://www.pierresilber.com/spikmethighe1.html

My wife has a pair of 6" shoes like these, but her feet are almost two sizes smaller than mine so I never get to wear them!

*goes off to fawn over ballet boots*

 

[Alistunut]

I think it does. I know I take a risk when I talk in terms of stereotypes. Any discussion about labels and applied identities is problematic.

Part of the work I do in my "real world" involves creating material that will catch the attention of traditionally defined "men" - as wide a spectrum on the local male population as possible - and motivate them to act. I am struggling with how to define that population without forcing it into a box. At the same time a part of me screams "that is not me" every time I get an idea of a slogan or image to use. I don't mind the struggle and I hope something useful develops from it - but it will not be something that defines a "real man"

This thread grew from some of my inner dialogue - why should I suffer alone - hee hee

Hee hee, huh. OK, I'll try to share your pain by taking a stab at your dilemma. I'm not sure I'm the best person to help though, since I'm XX rather than XY and have never even been to Kansas!

Would it work to focus on one aspect of traditional male roles in your area and develop the slogan around that trait rather than the men themselves?

What I am suggesting is that instead of saying something like, "real men protect their families so be sure to ______", you would say something like, "strong guardians protect their families by _______".

The idea is that you would zero in on something these males associate with being male (even though of course it's a trait found in many XXs as well as XYs), and that this trait is directly related to whatever action you are trying to inspire.

Without knowing more about the local male culture or the action you want them to take, I can't think of anything else at the moment. Thanks for answering my question, Shank.

 

[Betticus]

OMG, are you my friend R? I can literally hear her saying that. She only loves them when I force-femme her into Gothic drag.

*lustlustlustlustlust*

 

[JMohegan]

Now that I am back in Kansas about the only thing I do is wear colored earrings, hug other males, cry in public at times, and say thinks like "guess I was wrong about that" or "I'm sorry" - things a "real man" would not say 'round here.

My college football coach was a guy's guy. A tough as nails, hard-working, code of honor, band of brothers kind of a guy.

At the beginning of each season, he liked to say: "Boys, always remember two things. Number one: When a given rule is bullshit, real men ignore the bullshit and make up their own rules instead. And number two: None of *my* rules are bullshit."

For four years I followed his rules, both on and off the field. Tried just as hard as I possibly could to do what was expected of me, and then some. If football were sex, I would have been one *hell* of a great submissive. I really, really wanted to make this guy proud.

At the end of senior year, my buddies and I went to see Coach to say goodbye. For a long time, he just stood there silently looking at us, one by one. And then he started to cry. Not sobbing, just tears - giant tears - rolling down his cheeks and dropping unattended on the floor.

As if reading our minds, he said: "That's one of those bullshit rules, boys." After pausing to let this sink in, he continued. "I'm gonna miss you. You're some of the finest ballplayers I have ever had the honor to lead, and what's more, you're damn fine young men. I'm gonna miss you. No sense pretending it ain't so."

And that was the last in a very long line of valuable life lessons that he taught me.

"Real men don't cry" is a bullshit rule, and real men don't follow it.

 

[Shankara20]

My college football coach was a guy's guy. A tough as nails, hard-working, code of honor, band of brothers kind of a guy.

,,,,,,,,,

thank you for a very touching contribution.

 

[Shankara20]

*blush* Oh, it is. Between this and the furry communities I lurk at, plus when I people-watch among the mundanes/vanilla people, my head has practically a-sploded in joy, seeing all different sub-groups within society (and how society treats them).

people watching is one of my favorite hobbies

 

[Shankara20]

There are all sorts of tricks with regards to pants (especially with jeans) for how to enhance what you have, and minimize what you dislike.

there are not enough tricks in the world to help out this flat ass of mine *sigh*

 

[CutieMouse]

there are not enough tricks in the world to help out this flat ass of mine *sigh*

Believe me, I sympathize... there are not enough tricks on the planet to make my hips any smaller, either.

 

[Shankara20]

Thanks for answering my question, Shank.

your welcome - and thinks for your thoughts on the subject - they are helpful

 

[Shankara20]

Believe me, I sympathize... there are not enough tricks on the planet to make my hips any smaller, either.

oh well, I guess we just have to work with what we have then