Gag Reflex

[Strega524]

So, I've always wondered if anyone has the same problem I do...

I have an awful gag reflex and it really gets in the way when I'm trying to perform oral sex.

I've had plenty of boyfriends try to teach me how to relax and do it, but I've yet to find a way to completly surpress it...

Help!

 

[cordite]

Take this with a grain of salt as I'm no expert on the subject but I think you'd be better off "practicing" by yourself. I mean, no boyfriend no matter how well he reads your body language will be able to respond quickly and appropriately enough to keep from pushing you too far. You aren't trying to develop a callous in your throat. You want to be able to relax and to feel comfortable which is difficult if you're pushed too far.

Does that make sense?

 

[center_stage]

So, I've always wondered if anyone has the same problem I do...

I have an awful gag reflex and it really gets in the way when I'm trying to perform oral sex.

I've had plenty of boyfriends try to teach me how to relax and do it, but I've yet to find a way to completly surpress it...

Help!

I have a bit of a gag relfex too, and the only thing that helped me was reassuring myself that his cock can slide out as easily as it slid in.

There are also some products that you can use to numb your throat, but I'm not quite sure of any exact names.

 

[Strega524]

Take this with a grain of salt as I'm no expert on the subject but I think you'd be better off "practicing" by yourself. I mean, no boyfriend no matter how well he reads your body language will be able to respond quickly and appropriately enough to keep from pushing you too far. You aren't trying to develop a callous in your throat. You want to be able to relax and to feel comfortable which is difficult if you're pushed too far.

Does that make sense?

Thanks Cordite. That does make sense and I have attempted practicing by myself and I seem to do okay mostly, but then when I try the real thing I get flustered I guess...

Maybe it's a mental thing...

And once I start gagging it's over... I can't do it

Thanks for your advice though!

 

[Strega524]

I have a bit of a gag relfex too, and the only thing that helped me was reassuring myself that his cock can slide out as easily as it slid in.

There are also some products that you can use to numb your throat, but I'm not quite sure of any exact names.

Haha, yeah I guess it could just be me mentally freaking myself out... maybe I should talk to a therapist...

I've never tried a throat numbing thing... maybe I will.

Thanks for the advice!

 

[M's girl]

Ever wonder why you have a gag-reflex in the first place?

Don't get me wrong: I can handle/stand (or whatever) deepthroating but it will still have me gagging on some occasions. First of all you need to be comfortable doing it and that depends very much on your state of mind at the time you're doing it (never mind the over all attitude you have towards BJ's in general).

Besides, a gag reflex is there to prevent too larger 'objects' to be swallowed because your stomach would not be able to digest them How the hell is your throat supposed to know (unless you have camera surveillance in place) that in a BJ/deepthroat case it's OK unless your brain says so?

 

[Apollonia_K]

Strega,

I think 99% of giving oral sex without gagging is in your own mind. You have to really desire it, crave it, see yourself taking it all down your throat. You have to put your mind in that place and just do it.

You also have to be relaxed and feel safe. Relaxing is the easier of the two. Feeling safe may involve talking to your partner beforehand. Just explain how good you want to make him feel and let him know you have to be in control of how fast and how much you take.

For me this pretty much involved him not holding my head. If he gets too excited and can't seem to keep his hands from pushing you too far, you could always use a few scarves or neckties to keep his hands out of the way If you're afraid that in the heat of the moment he'll lift his hips and gag you, you can straddle his chest so you're putting a little pressure on his body to keep him in place. This gives you peace of mind and gives him something hot to look at too.

I realize that this might not work for everyone, however, I did have a pretty strong gag reflex and it worked for me. And if it doesn't work right away don't get discouraged, just keep practicing!

Good Luck

AK

 

[Honeybee80]

Have a glass of wine beforehand. You'll relax, but not be wasted. I think if you can get through it once or twice without gagging it will increase your confidence and it will just get easier and easier.

 

[Strega524]

Thanks!

I just wanted to thank everyone for the advice... I think you all have some great ideas and I agree that it is most likely something I'll have to mentally work on by relaxing, etc...

I actually frequently gag when just brushing my teeth, so I can practice when doing that as well... hehe

Once again, thanks ladies, I've really appriciated you taking time to respond!

 

[Night_Jasmine]

You might could try laying on your back, head hanging off the matress to take the curve out of the throat. I gag too easily, shocks the dentist each time during teeth exams. But that trick worked when I was married. Didn't do that often though. Bleechhh

 

[tanyachrs]

Cramming the thing down your throat is only one of many options. If you use your hands creatively, you don't need to put much more than half of it in. Concentrate on other techniques that you enjoy better and you may eventually relax enough to work in some deep throat. Your hands and your tongue are really far more mobile, creative, and precise than your throat.

 

[cumhungry]

i ADORE sucking my man's cock, and yet, to date after many years cannot take the whole thing. and it ain't for lack of trying or desire!!!!! it's pretty big, and long, and thick, so that doesn't help. i can take 6 or 7" no problem....this man tho......i can deep throat him before he gets hard all the way, but once he hits stage three hard on.......i either hit the gag reflex or simply can't breathe!

i was just reading today on some how-to site....and it said when you hit the gag reflex, just pause and relax, don't pull back right away, extend your tongue forward a bit (which somehow flattens it out in the back of your throat and quells the gag reflex) and then as you draw your tongue back in pull the cock in too........

just ticks me off that i can't swallow him. we have a dildo that is almost exactly the same size and shape and i think i should be practiciing on that, without the performance anxiety and such. he's watched me and says i can get pretty close. he never complains mind you, actually he gets off on the fact that i CAN'T take him all the way and that he does make me gag (sigh, men)......i'll just be damned if i can't conquer that delicious piece....

but any other tips out there???? guys????

 

[pretty_green_eyes]

I have a horrible gag reflex and it wasn't until my current love that it relaxed while giving head. I gag while brushing my teeth or going to the dentist or getting my throat checked by the doctor, but not while going down on him.

I think it's mostly a mental thing. I love (seriously love) sucking his cock and that is probably the reason why I don't gag while doing it. Maybe if you go into it thinking that way, the gag will lighten up. Relax while doing it and think about how good you are making him feel - and how good it will feel for you when he returns the favor.

Just a suggestion.

 

[Blitzz]

I'm no stranger to the big bad gag reflex. It definitely has to do with relaxing and I do think alot of it is a mental thing. After some practice, experience and a whole lot of weird gagging sounds (you'd be amazed) I have won my battle against the gag reflex.

 

[cumhungry]

is it possible to simply enounter a cock that's too big? i mean i can barely close my hand around the thing, my jaw pops just opening wide enough to take him in......altho i recall, eons ago, watching a how to video - this gal was a champ, her demonstration subject was John BeerCan Smith and it was no mystery as to how he got that name. she had a protegee and told her when you hit the gag reflex just push past it.......

 

[Amora]

So, I've always wondered if anyone has the same problem I do...

I have an awful gag reflex and it really gets in the way when I'm trying to perform oral sex.

I've had plenty of boyfriends try to teach me how to relax and do it, but I've yet to find a way to completly surpress it...

Help!

Ok, here's what I have done recently to learn to be able to deepthroat my hubby. I started off by always making sure I am the one in control, so have him lie on his back whilst you are sucking him. I find that either this position or having him stand in front of you is the easiest. Gradually take him in until you reach the back of your throat and the swallow, in the relaxation after the swallow, take him a little deeper, repeat until you actually gag slightly and the withdraw and lick just the tip etc, when you are relaxed try again remembering to swallow as he gets deeper into your mouth.

Took me about 8 weeks but I can now deepthroat my hubby who is a very decent size!

I chose to learn to do this of my own volition, hubby had no idea so perhaps that's why I found it easier because I had no pressure from him?

Amora

 

[Pegasus_Flying]

Cramming the thing down your throat is only one of many options. If you use your hands creatively, you don't need to put much more than half of it in. Concentrate on other techniques that you enjoy better and you may eventually relax enough to work in some deep throat. Your hands and your tongue are really far more mobile, creative, and precise than your throat.

Well said....

 

[Sadfrog]

Some advice.

I actually know a few things about this because of my profession in healthcare, so hopefully you can translate this somehow to a form that'll help you.

Your gag reflex is a normal neurological development when you learn to eat, but with many sensations and motor patterns when you eat can develop in a variety of manners. Hyper and hyposenitivity are big problems when it comes to eating as it involves a variety of health concerns. Sometimes it's just the way the nervs develop, or sometimes it's a reaction to early experiences. A premature child might develop a hypo-reactive gag reflex from being intubated and have a hard time choking or coughing when food goes down the wrong hole.

Relaxation will help yes. But another thing you'll want to do is de-sensitize your mouth and throat. DON'T do this in bed to start off, ok? You'll just be discouraged if you vomit on his crotch. Instead, get a few different objects around the house of varying sizes. Your toothbrush, maybe a candy-cane, a chopstick (smooth, not unfinished wood!), a stick of celery, etc. Basicly go for things with smooth, semi-rough, and grooved textures.

Next, take an object like the celery stick or candy cane (wet!), and move it around your tongue slowly, using light touch and some stronger pressure (not much, just enough to indent your tongue some). Move it around your front, around the sides, using light touch and pressure. SLOWLY work your way back as far as you're comfortable, and find a range that's somewhat uncomfortable but not enough to make you gag. Keep stimulating this area for a bit (maybe 5 minutes or so?) and then stop.

Try this technique progressivly but SLOWLY. The idea is to get your tongue used to touch and pressure in atypical areas of your tongue and (eventually) near the back of your throat. Eventually your brain and the nerves in your tongue will learn to re-interprit stimulation in these areas so it won't trigger your gag reflex. Try to do this several times a day, say 4-6 times, for roughly 15 or so minutes in a trial. You could even do it at work I'd assume, just use a candy-cane at your desk.

Good luck, but remember to be SAFE and SLOW with this. It won't happen overnight, but with steady progression and a variety of objects (different textures!), you should have some good success with deep-throating.

 

[WhiteAcacia]

I'm bringing up this topic again because I would really like to be able to train my throat to handle more each time and don't have a partner that I can practice with, hah.

I will try Sadfrog's recommendations, but also want to know if anyone would like to add anything to the list.

Thank you!