FWB question....

yellow_rose71

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If there was little chance of getting caught by your spouse or SO, would you take advantage of a friends with benefits arrangement? Have you ever had a FWB? Were you friends first?
 
If there was little chance of getting caught by your spouse or SO, would you take advantage of a friends with benefits arrangement? Have you ever had a FWB? Were you friends first?

I have done the friends with benefits thing but not when in another relationship. It was just two friends who got together occasionally and fucked.
 
Yes. Not that my first marriage was any good. FsWB were the relief valve.
 
No. It's not the getting caught, it's having enough respect for my husband to not go behind his back and have sex without telling him. If I wanted to do it, I would tell him first. He wouldn't accept it, he might divorce me but I couldn't hurt him like that. Also when we got married I promised him I would tell him beforehand if I was going to cheat and he promised the same.

Everyone has probably experienced a relationship where they have been lied to. Dishonesty and betrayal hurt so much more because it can never be taken back. Knowing your partner wants someone else isn't "better" but it isn't the same as being made a fool of by not knowing.

I am not against cheating, I understand why people do it. I am against the lying and hiding part of it. I think it's fair to tell your partner and give him/her an opportunity to respond before it happens. I believe cheating is a decision and it isn't just yours, it affects others so it's fair to allow them to decide their actions as well. If they decide cheating means a divorce, then you can see the consequences of your actions before you take them. If I was at the point where I am telling my husband I want to have sex with another guy, then I would go through with it. If I have enough courage to sleep with someone else then I had better have enough courage to stand by my decision and tell him.
 
I haven't. I probably wouldn't either, and it wouldn't be something I'd do lightly, but I can't honestly say "definitely not" to it either.
 
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