first time

[ccaseyride]

It was my first time and I could not get it up any suggestions please don't my fun of me

 

[Emerson40]

It was my first time and I could not get it up any suggestions please don't my fun of me

Your first time what? Not being able to get / maintain and erection? With a girl? With a guy? Putting up a tent? Having sex?

A bit more info would help others chime in with some advice.

 

[ccaseyride]

First time having sex

 

[Emerson40]

First time having sex

That's a start. Some folks may ask for more details to better understand your situation and give you their thoughts.

 

[Lord Pmann]

Let's hear a wee bit more detail. Age. Girlfriend's age. Situation.

You've left me with so little detail at the moment. So, I'm going to have to say that I really believe your best bet is to tie a stick to it. Make sure there are no critters or poison ivy, mate.

 

[ccaseyride]

I'm 21and she 23 it my first time having sex and she had sex before. anything you would like to know just ask

 

[stockman35]

Ok so, who is taking charge of the situation? It needs to be you! You find the perfect secluded place (no interuptions) and you slowly build your way to you goal. You need to plan things out in advance. How you want her to be positioned? Work slowly toward your goal.

 

[ccaseyride]

Thanks stock

 

[GorgeousGeekGirl]

First off, there is only one first time. Is this really the person and circumstance that you want your first time to be? Unless you're doing this as a wedding night thing, it's setting the precedent in your life for extra marital sex, which means you will have other lovers. You will forget other encounters, but always remember the first one. You want it to be worth remembering.

There is also the emotional factor. It's not just a mysterious miracle; your brain is going to be releasing a lot if very powerful mind altering hormones. Think you're horny now? If your first time is anything better than a disaster, you're going to be (or at least feel like) a raging addict. This is the reason behind the old joke "it doesn't matter where you go on your honeymoon because its not like you'll be leaving the hotel room."

All this said, it may seem like "holy cow! That's a lot of pressure." We'll, it's a big deal. Don't do it because you feel like you need to live up to an external standard or prove something. Since it will be with someone who will be in your memory for a lifetime, make sure it's a person and situation you want with you for life. If you balk, go with your gut. And if you doubt my lifetime schtick, look at the forums asking people about their first times. 50 years later they still remember it clear as day. I do.

 

[tonguedancer]

It was my first time and I could not get it up any suggestions please don't my fun of me

The most important thing to remember (and I'm sure you don't feel that way right now) is that in the long run it doesn't matter. There will be other times. You probably had erection problems because you were nervous and maybe because you were with a non-virgin girl. You probably felt like she would judge you. If she likes you and is on your side, she'll give you another chance.

What sorts of things have you done already? Has she hand jobbed you? Blown you? Have you eaten her? Lots of things to try and get confidence with before going to penetration. Do you have any problems with jerking off yourself? With her or other girls jerking you off? If not....bingo.....not anything physical and it's just nerves.

Lots of guys have problems now and then ESPECIALLY with a new/different girl because of.....nerves. It's like trying to hit a pitch or catch a fly ball....it's easy to do till you think about it. So...just try to do other things, get comfortable with her, and then try not to be thinking about it. Good luck.

 

[ccaseyride]

Thanks jerking myself no problems there

 

[shiny5437]

It's your first time. Don't sweat it. It's no big deal. Getting hung up about it is only likely to set up a cycle of anxiety and lack of erection. Keep at it. If you can't get it up take the opportunity to focus on her with a bit of manual or oral. Takes the pressure off you.

I couldn't get it up on my 1st time. I knew I was going to have sex that night and spent the day with a permanent stiffy till the actual time I needed one! Then I just about managed a semi and shot my bolt within seconds of getting inside her. I guess it shows that you don't necessarily need to be with your one true love / life partner for your first time but it helps to be with someone who you trust and get along well enough that it's not a big issue to work through the teething problems.

 

[blulilacgrl]

It was my first time and I could not get it up any suggestions please don't my fun of me

The only suggestion I have is (like others who posted before me) is to relax. Sex is and should be fun. The moment you start overthinking or worrying, well... you kinda kill the mood. Pressure of any sort ruins everything even for those that have been having sex for decades.

Perhaps next time don't even think about having penetrative sex. Just fool around. You will know when the time is right. More importantly your body will let you know.

Good Luck!

 

[ccaseyride]

Thanks guys

 

[summiter1]

Casey,

I remember my first time like it was yesterday. I am 21 and I was 17 at the time. While I was excited about finally getting to have sex I was also scared. Would I cum too soon, will I get her to have an orgasm, will I be able to go for round s 2,3,4. The anxiety and pressure is a lot for some.

While it has not happened to me I would suggest a lot of foreplay, take things slow, admit to the girl that you may be a bit nervous (it is normal) If she is into it have her get you good and ready with her hand and mouth. If you are worried about pregnancy/std's take that out of the equation by using a condom.

Anyway, relax, let it happen everyone was nervous their first time. If it would help have her get you off with handjobs and/or blowjobs until you build up the confidence to orgasm in front of her. Let me know how it goes. You will be fine!

 

[joelafayette]

.....

 

[twister947]

It happens. I'm 66...I've had a lot of great sex with a lot of great women. I've also had a few failures to launch. Just try to relax, and roll with it. There are better days and nights ahead.