Feedback request

[Brielle_Fox]

Hi all,

I'm new to Literotica and writing erotica. Would anyone be willing to give me feedback on my first story? https://www.literotica.com/s/the-masterpiece-3

 

[JuanaSalsa]

Hi all,

I'm new to Literotica and writing erotica. Would anyone be willing to give me feedback on my first story? https://www.literotica.com/s/the-masterpiece-3

I read, enjoyed, 5*d, and commented =]

Thanks for sharing and I hope you will write more. This one was lovely.

 

[TarnishedPenny]

Short, but ever so sweet!

 

[RoperTrace]

Short and hot, excellent first story. Left a comment.

 

[Amisit__Scintilla]

Thoroughly enjoyed it, looking forward to more of your work!

 

[Brielle_Fox]

I read, enjoyed, 5*d, and commented =]

Thanks for sharing and I hope you will write more. This one was lovely.

Thank you, JuanaSalsa!!

 

[Brielle_Fox]

Short, but ever so sweet!

Thank you, TarnishedPenny!!

 

[Brielle_Fox]

Short and hot, excellent first story. Left a comment.

Thank you, RoperTrace!!

 

[Brielle_Fox]

Thoroughly enjoyed it, looking forward to more of your work!

Thank you, Amisit_Scintilla!! I look forward to sharing more!

 

[SamScribble]

Try leaving a note in Story Feedback. You should get a lot more readers over there. The people who hang out here are mainly writers who read occasionally.

Good luck

 

[BobbyBrandt]

A good start to what I hope is a long run of quality stories.

 

[YDB95]

Beautiful! Looking forward to seeing more from you!

 

[Brielle_Fox]

Try leaving a note in Story Feedback. You should get a lot more readers over there. The people who hang out here are mainly writers who read occasionally.

Good luck

Ah! Ok, I will look for that and repost. Thanks!

 

[Brielle_Fox]

A good start to what I hope is a long run of quality stories.

Thank you, BobbyBrandt!!

 

[Brielle_Fox]

Beautiful! Looking forward to seeing more from you!

Thank you, YDB95!!

 

[Smuttyandfun]

So sensual and romantic. Really impressive, especially for a first submission. Gave you 5 stars, and I'm looking forward to reading more from you.

 

[Brielle_Fox]

So sensual and romantic. Really impressive, especially for a first submission. Gave you 5 stars, and I'm looking forward to reading more from you.

Thank you, Smuttyandfun!

 

[NewOldGuy77]

Hi all,

I'm new to Literotica and writing erotica. Would anyone be willing to give me feedback on my first story? https://www.literotica.com/s/the-masterpiece-3

I am 100% in agreement with @JuanaSalsa. A wonderful 5-start first effort, hopefully the first of many more. Bravo!

 

[MsNatalie99]

I read the story. At first I was worried, having seen its length. However, I was pleasantly surprised. Well done, 5s. I look forward to your next submission.

 

[Brielle_Fox]

I am 100% in agreement with @JuanaSalsa. A wonderful 5-start first effort, hopefully the first of many more. Bravo!

Thank you so much, NewOldGuy77!

 

[Brielle_Fox]

I read the story. At first I was worried, having seen its length. However, I was pleasantly surprised. Well done, 5s. I look forward to your next submission.

Thanks, MsNatalie99!

When you say you were worried about its length, did you mean because it is too short or too long?

 

[MsNatalie99]

Thanks, MsNatalie99!

When you say you were worried about its length, did you mean because it is too short or too long?

I don't necessarily believe that a story can be too short. However sometimes with erotica, with short stories, An author will sacrifice story for action. It happens in longer stories too, but tends to alarm me more frequently when it's short. Your story was well written, excellently told.

 

[Brielle_Fox]

Ok, thanks! And thank you!

 

[DanDelaware]

Pocket review:

"The paints!"/"Fuck the paints" Ahahahaha.
After a time, he slid, still hard, from her, and she mewed a complaint - the Shatner comma!

Just kidding, I like the story. It feels all hot and claustrophobic and sweaty, with just a touch of humor.

 

[DanDelaware]

The story seems to be written the same as a stage play, with the action all in one room and even a character that leaves the set and returns. I don't know if that was intentional, but it felt different from most other stories.