Feedback Request for First Submission

[Eros5150]

I would appreciate any feedback for my first-time submission, which can be found at:
http://www.literotica.com/s/the-christmas-surprise

This was a renewed foray into writing, having submitted a couple of stories to the now-defunct WhiteShadow board ages ago.

Would be interested in anyone's thoughts, good or bad.

Thanks.

 

[Belongs2Beth]

Well written story. It comes within an inch of being a squick for me but replace the voyueristic mother with a neighbor lady of similar age and I'd have had to fap.