Favourite Python lines.

[zeb1094]

This is an Ex-parrot!

Senseless waste of a human life.

Between the dead parrot sketch and the cheese shop, there are just too many to choose from.

And don't forget about 'Eric the 'af bee!'.

 

[entitled]

As the horrendous Black Beast lunged forward, escape for Arthur and his knights seemed hopeless, when, suddenly ... the animator suffered a fatal heart attack.


Why do i have this sudden urge to lock everybody out and have a Monty Python movie marathon tonight?

 

[~photoguy~]

I have a vewy good fwiend in Wome named Biggus Dickus.

oh my god Cloudy .. u made me laugh out loud

 

[~photoguy~]

Why do i have this sudden urge to lock everybody out and have a Monty Python movie marathon tonight?

funny.... I was thinking the same thing

 

[entitled]

funny.... I was thinking the same thing

Good idea, innit?



OK, everybody meet at my place. Bring the movies and lots to drink. i've got popcorn.

 

[zeb1094]

Good idea, innit?



OK, everybody meet at my place. Bring the movies and lots to drink. i've got popcorn.

And SNOW!

 

[entitled]

And SNOW!

YES!!! and SNOW!!!!!

 

[Weepingguitar]

Wenn ist das Nunstruck git und Slotermeyer? Ja!...
Beiherhund das Oder die Flipperwaldt gersput!

In 1945 Peace broke out. It was the end of the Joke.
Joke warfare was banned at a special session of the Geneva Convention, and in I950 the last remaining copy of the joke was laid to rest here in the Berkshire countryside, never to be told again.

 

[Weepingguitar]

And Oliver has run himself over...what a great twit!

 

[Guest]

Gotta be the "Ex-parrot" Cleese at his manic best!

 

[Kev H]

Some things in life are bad,
They can really make you mad,
Other things just make you swear and curse,
When you're chewing your life's gristle
Don't grumble, give a whistle,
And this'll help things turn out for the best,
And.....

Always look on the bright side of life.
[whistling]
Always look on the light side of life.
[whistling]

If life seems jolly rotten,
There's something you've forgotten,
And that's to laugh and smile and dance and sing.
When you're feeling in the dumps,
Don't be silly chumps.
Just purse your lips and whistle. That's the thing.
And...

Always look on the bright side of life.
[whistling]
Always look on the right side of life,
[whistling]

For life is quite absurd
And death's the final word.
You must always face the curtain with a bow.
Forget about your sin.
Give the audience a grin.
Enjoy it. It's your last chance, anyhow.
So,...

Always look on the bright side of death,
[whistling]
Just before you draw your terminal breath.
[whistling]

Life's a piece of shit,
When you look at it.
Life's a laugh and death's a joke. It's true.
You'll see it's all a show.
Keep 'em laughing as you go.
Just remember that the last laugh is on you.
And...

Always look on the bright side of life.
[whistling]
Always look on the right side of life.
[whistling]
Always look on the bright side of life!
[whistling]
Always look on the bright side of life!
[whistling]
Always look on the bright side of life!
[whistling]
Always look on the bright side of life!
[whistling]
Always look on the bright side of life!
[whistling]
Always look on the bright side of life!
[whistling]
Always look on the bright side of life!
[whistling]
Always look on the bright side of life!
[whistling]
Always look on the bright side of life!
[whistling]
Always look on the bright side of life!
[whistling]

Eric Idle rules(d).

 

[Weepingguitar]

The Song That Goes Like This:

Once in every show
There comes a song like this
It starts off soft and low
And ends up with a kiss
Oh where is the song
That goes like this?
Where is it? Where? Where?

A sentimental song
That casts a magic spell
They all will hum along
We'll overact like hell
For this is the song that goes like this
Yes it is! Yes it is!

Now we can go straight
Right down the middle eight
A bridge that is too far for me

I'll sing it in your face
While we both embrace
And then
We change
The key

Now we're into E!
*hem* That's awfully high for me
But as everyone can see
We should have stayed in D
For this is our song that goes like this!

I'm feeling very proud
You're singing far too loud
That's the way that this song goes
You're standing on my toes
Singing our song that goes like this!

I can't believe there's more
It's far too long, I'm sure
That's the trouble with this song
It goes on and on and on
For this is our song that is too long!

*spoken* Jesus Christ! Goddamnit!

We'll be singing this til dawn
You'll wish that you weren't born
Let's stop this damn refrain
Before we go insane
For this is our song that ends like this!

 

[XCal]

"Oh, let me have just a little bit of peril?
No. It's unhealthy.
I bet you're gay."

 

[Noor]

"NOBODY expects the Spanish Inquisition! Our chief weapon is surprise...surprise and fear...fear and surprise.... Our two weapons are fear and surprise...and ruthless efficiency.... Our *three* weapons are fear, surprise, and ruthless efficiency...and an almost fanatical devotion to the Pope.... Our *four*...no... *Amongst* our weapons.... Amongst our weaponry...are such elements as fear, surprise.... I'll come in again."

 

[rgraham666]

Then they hit on the next big plan, which they called 'The Next Big Plan'.

 

[Noor]

A while ago I was watching an show/interview with the members of Python including a urn said to have Chapman's ashes. At the end of the show, they started singing "bright side of life" and having tea. At one point, from what I remember, one of them asks Chapman's ashes if he'd like some tea, opens the urn and pour tea in. I was laughing so hard at that point I didn't see if he got any sugar or lemon!
Did anyone else see that?

Found it:
http://orangecow.org/pythonet/aspen/aspen3.html
its at the end, it was cream and sugar!

 

[rgraham666]

Just had to Google it.

The Piranha Brothers

I hear you've been a naughty boy, Clement.

 

[seth6138]

It's only a flesh wound.

 

[Rumple Foreskin]

Ximinez: Hm! She is made of harder stuff! Cardinal Fang! Fetch...THE COMFY CHAIR!

[JARRING CHORD]

[Zoom into Fang's horrified face]


http://people.csail.mit.edu/paulfitz/spanish/tt11.jpg


Fang [terrified]: The...Comfy Chair?​

Rumple Foreskin

 

[gauchecritic]

Mrs Hedges: "Well, I don't know what's come over him doctor. He's just not the man I married."

Doctor: Am I the man you married Mrs Hedges? (Begins to molest Mrs Hedges)

Mrs Hedges: Ooh no, ooh. You'll get struck off."

 

[Sex and Death]

Lovely plumage!

 

[matriarch]

Lumberjack Song

I'm a lumberjack, and I'm okay.
I sleep all night. I work all day.

Mounties : He's a lumberjack, and he's okay.
He sleeps all night and he works all day.

I cut down trees. I eat my lunch.
I go to the lavatory.
On Wednesdays I go shoppin'
And have buttered scones for tea.


Mounties: He cuts down trees. He eats his lunch.
He goes to the lavatory.
On Wednesdays he goes shopping
And has buttered scones for tea.

Chorus : I'm (He's) a lumberjack, and I'm (he's) okay.
I (He) sleep(s) all night and I (he) work(s) all day.

I cut down trees. I skip and jump.
I like to press wild flowers.
I put on women's clothing
And hang around in bars.

Mounties : He cuts down trees. He skips and jumps.
He likes to press wild flowers.
He puts on women's clothing
And hangs around in bars?!

Chorus : I'm (He's) a lumberjack, and I'm (he's) okay.
I (He) sleep(s) all night and I (he) work(s) all day.

I cut down trees. I wear high heels,
Suspendies, and a bra.
I wish I'd been a girlie,
Just like my dear Mama (or Papa in later versions)


Mounties : He cuts down trees. He wears high heels,
Suspendies, and a bra?!

Chorus : I'm (He's) a lumberjack, and I'm (he's) okay.
I (He) sleep(s) all night and I (he) work(s) all day.

Yes, I'm (He's) a lumberjack, and I'm (he's) ok-a-y.
I (He) sleep(s) all night and I (he) work(s) all day.

AAAAAAARGGGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!

Ear worm. The Gosling just saw this and started singing........she's going to be driving me nuts with that all evening.

Thanks a fucking bunch !!

 

[rgraham666]

AAAAAAARGGGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!

Ear worm. The Gosling just saw this and started singing........she's going to be driving me nuts with that all evening.

Thanks a fucking bunch !!

Snerk! Gasp! (Runs out of room, hysterical laughter sounds in the distance, runs back)

Good one, Crim!

 

[zeb1094]

And now for something completely different!

 

[Weepingguitar]

And now for something completely different!

IT'S!!!