Fantasy of doing sex with another guy

[Camille1981]

Hello, sometimes I feel like I am the only woman with this issue. I am married with a beautiful guy, fit body, and very active sexually. I couldn't ask for a better sex partner but I have a secret fantasy and from what I see I will not do it anytime soon. My sexual fantasy is to have sex with a totally strange guy while my husband is watching! I'm wet already just from thinking about it. No, I don't want to cheat on my lover.
I already showed him some of these cuckold videos but he didn't like the idea at all. Any girl out there with the same issue? Any hints on what should be my approach?

PS: you guys no need to send me private messages, I am not interested to cheat on my husband.

 

[TomPal]

In my opinion this is just a fantasy and its not a real desire so don'tfreak out...it will pass

 

[Primalex]

Any hints on what should be my approach?

Be OK with what you can't do, because there is so much you CAN do.

 

[Sissy_Dennis]

It's a shame your husband isn't open to the idea of being a cuckold. I think every woman deserves to have a man who is completely devoted to her needs and desires, no matter what they are.

 

[flint9]

enjoy

you can have some fun play time without actually doing it,role play etc.so many fantasys are actually very hard to fullfill.

 

[amofiga]

OK, so a lot of guys really aren't into a cuckold scene where they sit or are tied up or essentially forced to watch their wife with another guy. HOWEVER, a lot more guys would be interested in a swap scene where he could see you fucking another guy but you would also be seeing him with another woman. Are you opposed to this sort of thing? OR..... there is the possibility of starting with a threesome with another guy and your guy. He may be more into it if he's part of the party and not just watching as a cuck. Would you then perhaps be willing to do the same for him with one of your girlfriends?

The suggestion above about role play could help IF your guy is open to it. He would have to be into it enough to make it as intense as possible and as real as possible for you. I've done those sorts of things and it works best if you are blindfolded and he is really good at dirty talk to set the scene or hearing you describing what's going on in your mind.

 

[policywank]

A key consideration with cuckold porn is it almost always portrays the other man as inherently better and the cuckold as humiliated. There is an overpowering sense of your husband being replaced by a better man.

Lots of people are into that either as reality or fantasy/role play. However, that is a fairly extreme place to start considering that a lot of men aren't even ready to contemplate the chance that their spouse is sexually attracted to other men.

Even if that is where things are headed it is sort of analogous to jumping from being almost virginal straight into hardcore BDSM. IMO it is better to take small steps to see if he truly is interested and able to handle it and if so to condition him as you go.

The starting point is to simply get him accustomed to the idea that you do have sexual desire for other men and can appreciate casual sex and variety in sexual experiences and partners.

Many men are conditioned to believe that if they are a good man their wife would never have interest in another. That just isn't true. Most women don't act on it for any number of reasons including a genuine commitment to monogamy with their partners. But that doesn't mean we don't think about it. Explain that to him. Relate to him how you know other women who feel the same way. Help him understand that the men who think their women could never want another and base their own masculinity on that premise are just bullshitting themselves.

He needs to see himself not as a man who is lesser than the rest because his wife desires other men, but a man who is more enlightened than the rest because he doesn't need to delude himself otherwise. And present yourself to him as a woman in control and taking control of this dynamic......not some dumb bimbo giving in to an asshole with a big dick. This way you build his titillation and interest and develop a bond of sexual adventurousness while neutralizing his insecurities. And as the person leading, never fall into the trap of saying "oh you shouldn't feel that way" or "no he isn't interested in me." You can't lead him down this road to overcome his own self-denial while reserving the right to indulge in it yourself.

And if he isn't ready to proceed then stop. It should never be about making him do anything. Coax and convince but don't force. Once you are further along you can play the games where it seems as though he is being forced but that is different altogether (in a similar way to how BDSM is different from abuse).

 

[Kittyscave]

Another female perspective...

I feel your pain. My husband is just as you describe your guy. He is hit on constantly. We even tried swinging for a while, but he remained too possessive and only into me for it to be fun.

The fantasy of having other men who will do to me what he is not comfortable doing (more D/s stuff) is very strong. But, I will not sacrifice my marriage, either, for a dalliance that would likely not live up to the scene in my head, anyway.

I have found some release here, playing out my fantasy and developing a relationship with a practiced Dom. Sometimes it still feels like cheating, but it is still my husband reaping the benefits of my fantasy play.

In my experience, you're not likely to get him to change his stripes. Enjoy yourself here, read, interact with others, and develop your fantasy life to quench your thirst.

Sometimes we simply can't have our cake and eat it, too.

 

[Lord_Steve]

YOU'RE PROBABLY GAY AND THAT'S FINE oh wait you're a woman nvm.

you have a fetish, and that's also fine. if your husband isn't into it, try to find alternatives. as several posters have mentioned, porn is a terrible example to draw upon for any healthy sexual relationship. the cuckold fetish is pretty specific, and you might get more mileage if you suggest equitable partner-swapping. how do you feel about your husband fucking another woman?

 

[Blue]

_____

 

[sexywriterfla]

Another female perspective...

I feel your pain. My husband is just as you describe your guy. He is hit on constantly. We even tried swinging for a while, but he remained too possessive and only into me for it to be fun.

The fantasy of having other men who will do to me what he is not comfortable doing (more D/s stuff) is very strong. But, I will not sacrifice my marriage, either, for a dalliance that would likely not live up to the scene in my head, anyway.

I have found some release here, playing out my fantasy and developing a relationship with a practiced Dom. Sometimes it still feels like cheating, but it is still my husband reaping the benefits of my fantasy play.

In my experience, you're not likely to get him to change his stripes. Enjoy yourself here, read, interact with others, and develop your fantasy life to quench your thirst.

Sometimes we simply can't have our cake and eat it, too.

Sage advice.

 

[SlutAddicted]

The cuckold videos are as much about him being treated like shit as they are about you fucking another guy. That's not really helpful communication unless both parts of that are what you really want.

 

[ChattyAnnie]

I know my husband would never intentionally share me with another man or want to watch me have sex in front of him, but I do have this fantasy about a thief that breaks into our house, ties my husband to a chair and then takes me forcefully while he watches. I know if would be dangerous to hire someone to do that but sometimes I wonder...

 

[Blue]

I know my husband would never intentionally share me with another man or want to watch me have sex in front of him, but I do have this fantasy about a thief that breaks into our house, ties my husband to a chair and then takes me forcefully while he watches. I know if would be dangerous to hire someone to do that but sometimes I wonder...

Might be just a little too on the traumatic side for a typical person's tastes.
Maybe he'll enjoy the intensity though?
Who knows.

 

[ChattyAnnie]

Might be just a little too on the traumatic side for a typical person's tastes.
Maybe he'll enjoy the intensity though?
Who knows.

I would never do it but the fantasy of it is exciting!

 

[Blue]

I simply cannot stop watching those fingers in your gif.

 

[ChattyAnnie]

I simply cannot stop watching those fingers in your gif.

I know. I so want a man to take me that way!

 

[suckonsimon]

I know. I so want a man to take me that way!

Here's me assuming you have that Annie!
I confess I so love your gif cuz it's ... familiar!
... and it's the guy's outrageous whispers too I think.

xx

 

[2wayroad]

I'm a man who would really enjoy that from time to time. Especially if the man dominated me too. Sadly, it won't happen. She has no desire to participate in enabling my bi side and no desire to be with another man, or won't admit to it.

 

[ChattyAnnie]

Here's me assuming you have that Annie!
I confess I so love your gif cuz it's ... familiar!
... and it's the guy's outrageous whispers too I think.

xx

Calling me a whore and a slut I am sure...

 

[La damnee elle la licorne]

 

[Freya_Gin]

A key consideration with cuckold porn is it almost always portrays the other man as inherently better and the cuckold as humiliated. There is an overpowering sense of your husband being replaced by a better man.

Yeah, that's exactly what the cuckold fetish about. And make no mistake, some guys really get off on that. Most don't though.

There are guys who just like to watch, however. I had a guy like that one. He would bring me a guy occasionally and watch us while masturbating. If he didn't cum from that, he had to go next. (We always made sure the first guy used a condom, so the only "sloppy" part of his seconds was how wet I was.) Maybe that is more like what the original poster had in mind?

 

[DamianCain]

Hi Camille. I curious about your experience. I love the idea, and even more the reality, of my wife sleeping with other men. I love it when she is turned on in ways that I can't offer. While I don't like feeling humiliated, I do love to experience an abject sense of powerlessness. These feelings are so fulfilling, both sexually and emotionally, that I absolutely crave them-- though my wife has mixed feelings about sleeping with other men or even entertaining the thought of it.

What I'm wondering about is, do you experience the same sort of cravings for emotional and sexual fulfillment, that would be achieved through sleeping with another man, but that are tied into your relationship with your husband?

Or do you just want to have sex with other men?

 

[may_I_please]

I read a thread about being shared and found it hot.

My husband would never countenance such a thing. As another poster said some men are truly possessive and do not share.

So a fantasy it remains.

 

[Leigh81]

We enjoy this role play & a few weeks ago I bought a hollow strap on made by Adam & Eve. It's only 6" long with a 5 3/4" girth. Heavy duty straps & well made. It was suppose to be a Christmas present but I gave it to him early (no pun intended)
We also have a really good quality leather harness & 3 dildos that fit. This is way better for him to wear. Much more natural movements since he slips inside (with lube).
The whole cuckold fetish is his biggest fantasy & this has added a new dimension as now I get something physical from it.
In Canada it's sold at The Love Shop chain.

L