Family Order And Behavior...

[Lost Cause]

What "number" of child are you? Only, middle, last? What behavior did you aquire from it?

I'm a middle child, two older brothers, two younger brothers. I got beat on by my older bros, and saw my Parent's be soft with dicipline on the two younger bros. I developed a sense of justice, and found myself being the "peacemaker" as far as not wanting things be out of order, and even in distribution. I would settle disputes with all my brothers, make deals with my Parents, and keep everything balanced. I played alone in a world of my making, to escape the noisy household and problems. I enjoyed my quiet time, not needing others for my benefit. I became independent minded.
I'm like that to this day, I enjoy the company of friends, but enjoy my quiet time to read, and ride my Harley. My favorite thing is to do work with problem solving attributes.

*How'd you turn out?

 

[Guest]

First born. Only girl with 2 brothers.

Yeah. Typical. *LOL*

 

[Debbie]

I am the oldest and I turned out ok. LOL My sister is the bossy one.

 

[HeavyStick]

I am the first... middle and last

 

[LordOfDarkness]

I'm the seventh son of the seventh son.

 

[freakygirl]

I'm the middle child

One older (living) brother

One younger (deceased) brother.

I was the "good" kid of the family. I was smart enough to learn not to do something.... or maybe it was I learned how to do something and not get caught

 

[Bob_Bytchin]

Very interesting thread.

I only have a younger brother (by 7 years)....while I was spanked, and beaten a few times, my brother was coddled. My parents never seemed to cut me any slack, yet they gave my brother the extra mile all the time. During Xmas when I was 11 (and every Xmas after that) I was only given clothes...my brother got all kinds of cool things, including TV's, radios, VCR's etc...

Now, I'm married, have 4 kids of my own who I strive to treat equally, and strive to raise as decent human beings. Just an average Joe for the most part. I don't drink, don't smoke, don't drive like a maniac, and I've never been in trouble with the law.

My brother has been in and out of jail, never finished high-school, has a few kids floating around by various women, and I suspect that he is a drug runner.

 

[april-wine]

Oldest of three girls.........


I am pretty stereotypical lol......The problem solver, the peacemaker, the mom in waiting lol.....All those things apply.....Hmmmm but sometimes they tell me I am BOSSY......

 

[Never]

Only child/single parent.
I have no idea how or if this influenced my development and behavior.

 

[lovetoread]

I have 2 older sisters and one younger brother.

I was one messed up kid.

 

[Lost Cause]

Hmmmmmmmm....

If anyone knows, I'd like to know the pecking order of the Bush daughters! It could explain their obnoxious behaviors.

To only children; Did your experiences make you more self-reliant, or more dependent on others for esteem?

 

[Never]

Self-reliant.

 

[Lost Cause]

Why I started this...

That female beating her kid. My Parents never raised a hand to us in anger, never! You know that abused kids grow up to be abusers, or worse! The other kinds of kids see family injustices, and either manage the environment, or run to outside influences. I'm so grateful for what I had, and empathize to those who didn't.
I think it's cool how people grow in a pecking order, or have none in a family, and how/why they develop their character for life!

 

[Cheyenne]

I'm the oldest, of course.

 

[horny_giraffe]

I am the third of four children.

The main results, more than anything, are my sense of independence of my parents. I didn't have a lot of rules, growing up, so I mostly did whatever I wanted.

The oldest sibling, my sister, has a bit of a Electra complex and always has this love/hate thing going on with my father. Many of her decisions still seem to be in reaction to my father, directly, or her internalized view of him and my mother.

The youngest sibling still seems to require a bit of coddling, even at 32, from both of my parents. She seems a little aimless without direction from them. But she's a strange mix of acquiescence and stubborness.

My brother and I, the middle kids, seem to be much more independent of the family--doing our own thing, making our own decisions a little more. I believe that we are a little more balanced.

My older brother and sister are both much more adventurous than I am, and have a tendency to take more uncalculated risks. They have both had many exciting and interesting experiences.

I, on the other hand, am quite cautious and rarely proceed with any decision without a clear assessment of the risks and benefits. I am very methodical and I am generally only willing to take calculated risks. I believe this is why I often seem to have more available resources, particularly money.

We are an extremely close-knit family, and I feel that I have benefitted a great deal from being in a large family.

For environmental/political reasons, I don't want to have more than two children. But I have to say that I will miss the tremendous love and larger sense of kinship that comes with a larger family.

 

[MissTaken]

I was first born, eldest in my generation and had three younger brothers.

For me, I have always been the "rock" of the family. My brothers have always come to me first for advice or guidance or to break some bad news to mom. lol They still do.

And mom, used me in college to help her deal with teen issues with the brothers that she didn't understand. i.e. drugs and alcohol.

The books say I am and should be the successful one. Then, to throw a monkey wrench in the pile, the books say being from a single parent family we are all under achievers. Hmmmmm four children, four college degrees, four happy, successful children? Perhaps the books were wrong?

Social work theory can also match the preferred significant other in terms of birth order. For me, I should not be with another first born. Control issues would prevail.

 

[Purrde Flower]

I have 3 older brothers (2 of the older ones from my dad's previos marriage) then there is me. I also have a much much younger sister from my fathers third marriage.


I really only lived with all of my brothers for about 5 years. i remeber my oldest brother scooping some peanut butter onto a piece of bread and wadding it up then shoving it in my mouth not letting me spit it out. chew and swollow he said and I did.

I remeber my (my mom's son) brother tearing my battery operated dolls apart so he could build himself a radio.

I turend out pretty decent I guess. no respect for my mother's or father's authority. Rarely listened to a thing I was told. Of course this all has to do with other things in my life as well Over all I'm pretty normal now

 

[Trail48]

Oldest of 3

I was very compliant to everyones wishes.....till near 40....then I broke bad on 'em. Now I'm the black sheep.

I'm happy as the black sheep

 

[someplace]

The oldest

the overachiever throughout childhood. Then I decided to change places with my sister (middle child). She's now the bossy, opinionated, rigid overachiever. That's fine. She gets Mom living with her. I'm okay with that.

 

[ExLimey]

I have an older brother (4 years). I spent most of my childhood being physically abused. My defense was what would be called today, psy-ops. Being brutally honest, it probably contributed to the severity of many of the beatings.

My brother was/is the more adventurous, was always getting into more trouble than me. Nothing major but my folks never really had to worry about me.

I'm very independent, always have been. There are a lot of people who know me but very few that I allow to know the real me. I tend to keep everyone at arms length. I have to admit being happier most of the time when it's just me and my dog.

Even though I live 2500 miles from my parents we are still very close. I don't think we have a typical relationship. Most of my friends from Cali who have met my parents think they're really cool (which they are). Our relationship and how we rely on each other was definitely influenced by the fact that we moved from the UK and only had each other to depend on family wise.

My brother is married and has two kids. I rarely speak to him, usually at the holidays or if he's at my folks when we call. It's funny but neither of us seems bothered by that arrangement. I know this bothers my Mom because she's mentioned it to me several times.

 

[Lancecastor]

I'm the eldest of three boys, born to parents each the youngest of nine.

I'm knowlegable, responsible, alpha, dominant, stubborn, independant, confident, competitive, high-achiever, arrogant and superior.

I have some lesser qualities as well, I'm sure...but they aren't of any consequence.

Ha!

Birth order is neat stuff; I'm on the lookout for a youngest of three sisters born to parents where the father is the eldest of several boys.

Cheers;

Lance

 

[Guest]

The youngest of 27 children.

 

[Trail48]

The youngest of 27 children.

Wow..I bet dinner was fun

 

[Bob_Bytchin]

The youngest of 27 children.

Wow, that was some litter!

 

[Rubyfruit]

I don't know that birth order plays a big part when there are only two, as in my case, but I am the youngest, by 15 months. I think the fact that my sibling is a boy played a bigger part in the differences in the way we were treated.