Extra Long Penis...

[WintertimeLove7]

OK, i dont know if this is a common problem or not, but it seems like every time my boyfriend and i have sex, he "bottoms out" and hits my cervix before everything is in, and its really painful sometimes. He's pretty big, about 8 inches, so he can only fit about 6 into me.

Anyone ever had this problem? Or know of any positions besides just missionary to minimize it? I've also heard that putting a cock ring on the penis as a restrictor can help stop it from going in too far. I've never used or even seen a cock ring so i have no idea if thats practical or not. Any suggestions are welcome!

 

[Eilan]

*breathes a huge sigh of relief because this thread wasn't what I thought it was going to be*

Welcome to Lit, WintertimeLove7.

My hubby's average, and we have this problem as well; it's worse during the first half of my cycle when my cervix appears to be more sensitive. We've found that spooning and my being on my side while my hubby's upright (whatever that position's called) allow for deeper penetration with significantly less discomfort.

This is a good recent thread on the topic. Just ignore the parts about going "past the cervix."

Hope that helps. Good luck.

 

[Norajane]

Yup, this is common with any size penis. Position has a lot to do with it, and where you are in your menstural cycle can also make a difference.

I'd recommend cowgirl and reverse cowgirl - you on top. You can control the depth if you're riding him. He can also sit on the couch or sit up in bed, and you can ride him from that position, too.

Also, a side by side position, where he enters you from the rear while you're spooning. He can't go as deeply that way, and you also have some freedom of movement to pull away if he hits your cervix too hard.

Here's a site with a large selection of different types of cock rings. Look through the pages. I would think that if it's wide, it will act as a spacer between your body and his, so he can't go in as deeply.

http://nawtythings.com/cockrings3.html

 

[Norajane]

*breathes a huge sigh of relief because this thread wasn't what I thought it was going to be*

me too

 

[WintertimeLove7]

my network sucks so i cant delete my double post. sorry guys!

 

[WintertimeLove7]

thanks for the suggestions. but since i've never used a cock ring before, can anyone recommend any specific types that would help with my problem? i'm looking at that site but i just can't pick one...a lot of them seem wide enough to at least be an indicator of how much is in, so this is a huge help. i just wish there was more information about the products instead of just the picture and price.

i'm really happy about this post though. i was starting to get really frustrated about our sex life...

 

[TBKahuna123]

I'm still not sure a cock ring will work all that well. I mean it would have to be a pretty thick ring. To work I think this would have to be more than a normal cock ring, more like the kind that have the large clitoral stimulators around them. Still nothing wrong with giving this a try.

I've had this problem in the past with a couple of women, and I am not huge! POsitions can help, the woman on top is a great suggestion, but really it comes down to the guy being responsible for controlling himself. He has to be aware that he can't just slam all the way into you, that he has to be a bit more careful. A lot of women seem to think this will hinder their man's enjoyment of the act. If it does hinder his enjoyment then he's missing the point, in my opinion.

Don't give up hope dear, all is not lost. A little caring, a little experimentation and all will be right. Still don't put this all on yourself, your man needs to take some responsibility for your pleasure (and lack of pain) as well. Just remember this isn't like it's your or that you are broken in some way. Many women think that, but it's just not so.

 

[Guest]

 

[WintertimeLove7]

trust me, he's heard many an "ugh thats too far!" etc. it seems like he's fine with not putting it in too far until he gets close, then he just gets too excited i guess and loses control. we also have very little time to practice since he goes to school 1000 miles away from me, so we only see each other on breaks and a couple of weekends a semester. i'm seeing him again in 3 weeks so i really want to make some progress, though.

 

[TBKahuna123]

I stress again, don't let him off the hook here. I applaud your desire to find a way around this issue, but he still needs to take responsibility for not hurting you. Getting close and losing control is NOT a good excuse.

 

[Norajane]

I don't know if the cock ring thing will work, but I can see how something like these might be worth a try. This one is $5.

http://www.babeland.com/catalog/images/YC250030.jpg

http://www.babeland.com/catalog/images/YC250035.jpg http://www.babeland.com/catalog/images/YC010115.jpg




They're very stretchy so just put the ring on the penis. They're supposed to go around the penis and balls, but that's usually to prolong erections and for added stimulation, I think?

This is the site those are from: http://www.babeland.com/page/TIB/CTGY/men-cock-rings


And this site has good descriptions you might find helpful: http://www.blowfish.com/catalog/toys/clit.html

 

[Norajane]

I stress again, don't let him off the hook here. I applaud your desire to find a way around this issue, but he still needs to take responsibility for not hurting you. Getting close and losing control is NOT a good excuse.

*nods*

Great advice!

 

[Quoll]

*breathes a huge sigh of relief because this thread wasn't what I thought it was going to be*

.....

 

[thirty]

The depth of pussies also varies

Mine is a little less than average, so, I have no comment on this.

The length of penises varies, then how about the depth of pussies? I never hear about that some guy even complained about his girl's pussies.
What's your ideas?

 

[Norajane]

Mine is a little less than average, so, I have no comment on this.

The length of penises varies, then how about the depth of pussies? I never hear about that some guy even complained about his girl's pussies.
What's your ideas?

The shallower the pussy, the bigger a guy can believe his dick is.

 

[Guest]

 

[mikeofokc]

Men! Just laugh at us. We are stubborn little boys at times.

trust me, he's heard many an "ugh thats too far!" etc. it seems like he's fine with not putting it in too far until he gets close, then he just gets too excited i guess and loses control. we also have very little time to practice since he goes to school 1000 miles away from me, so we only see each other on breaks and a couple of weekends a semester. i'm seeing him again in 3 weeks so i really want to make some progress, though.

Follow the advise of not letting him off the hook. Great sex is about pleasing our partner and if I hurt her its a bummer, takes me out of the zone and distracting. Also frankly if we hit the cervix sometimes it hurts us. If u let him keep being selfish neither of you will really enjoy sex as much as is possible. There is a lot more pleasures to be discovered than either of you have yet imagined. Dont let something like this block your way.

The mechanical ring devices are intended I believe to help men maintain an erection rather than limit penetration. It does it my restricting the reverse flow of blood out of the penis leaving us artificially hard and a nice shade of strangled blue. Put that cock ring well it will do the most good, on your car antenna. Makes for hours of great laughs when people drive by staring.

Sex in a different positon generall works to avoid the problem quite well. I personaly found cervix contact more likely in missionary than the other positions. So spooning or doggy or even a trapeze will do the trick for me, just dont let go of that trapeze lady.

Remember, no one really taught us about sex. We learned it trough trial and a lot of error. Men in particular dont ask questions about sex. Of course men think if they saw it in a movie they can do it too. So the whole 10 minutes we watched our last porn clip is about as much education we think we need. Porn isnt education, it is fictious entertainment. Help your partners, learn with them, share with them and dont take what you are doing now as like its the best it gets.

The contractions we feel during orgasm are really quite subtle just like in women. If men believe that porn stars have better orgasms by having slamming sex than tell them to try jacking off into a wall first. So help your men learn and discuss it with them, leave erotic books around discussing various techniques(pictures included of course, u know men) and most of all if we keep running into your brick wall then start slapping us on the noggin. Bribe him if necessary. More sex or even better let him leave the toilet seat up today if he does a good job last night.

I have the same size penis as your partner. I can enjoy sex just as well with a 5.75 inch stroke as I can with a 6.0 inch stroke(I dont bother measuring btw so you will have to take my word for it). A 6.05 inch and beyond doesnt give the last two inches of me any pleasure at all. Besides who brags about getting an 8 inch dick in a 6 inch hole. Duhhh!

 

[BarnabySchmidt]

It's obvious that the poster meant to discuss what penis size qualifies as extra long. So I will now hijack this thread and change the discussion to this because it is a new, undiscussed issue.

Extra long penises are anythin gbigger than 10" in length- to be distinguished from long penises which are anything bigger than 7" iun length. I hope that clears up the confusion surrounding this thread and what it was actually meant to be about.

<please note sarcasm in above 2 paragraphs>

 

[WintertimeLove7]

ok, after all this feedback i feel like i need to defend my boyfriend. no, he is not some sex-crazed maniac who cant control himself when we have sex. on the contrary, he is very caring and stops and moves around whenever i tell him something hurts. he also makes sure i never miss an orgasm, etc. the thing is, we cant exactly PRACTICE this stuff. we've only been alone when we had sex once, and that was the first time so obviously it wasnt that good anyway. since then its been quickies in my basement after my parents go to bed. LOTS of paranoia there. so you can see how i would just want to get the sex part over with so no one hears us or catches us being naughty in the basement. but i will say, if we do practice more and he still cant manage to do it without hurting me, i'll be done with him.

also, someone mentioned before about porn, which got me to thinking, how do porn stars do it? i mean, it seems like they NEVER have this cervix problem. is there some secret they dont know? i'm jealous!

 

[hogjack]

Consider getting your cervix expanded. There are several over-the-counter products that can expand a cervix up to 15% [some claim more but their documentation is questionable].

 

[Norajane]

ok, after all this feedback i feel like i need to defend my boyfriend. no, he is not some sex-crazed maniac who cant control himself when we have sex. on the contrary, he is very caring and stops and moves around whenever i tell him something hurts. he also makes sure i never miss an orgasm, etc. the thing is, we cant exactly PRACTICE this stuff. we've only been alone when we had sex once, and that was the first time so obviously it wasnt that good anyway. since then its been quickies in my basement after my parents go to bed. LOTS of paranoia there. so you can see how i would just want to get the sex part over with so no one hears us or catches us being naughty in the basement. but i will say, if we do practice more and he still cant manage to do it without hurting me, i'll be done with him.

I suspect when you whip out the pretty pink cock ring, he'll realize that he needs to work on the control thing.

 

[nightridernj]

I was under the impresion that at the end of the tunnel, at the cerivix, is were you need to hit to give her a cul-de-sac orgams?

 

[Eilan]

I was under the impresion that at the end of the tunnel, at the cerivix, is were you need to hit to give her a cul-de-sac orgams?

Some women like a hard cervix pounding, but, for others, it's very painful, and not in a good way.

For me, it's all about the g-spot.

also, someone mentioned before about porn, which got me to thinking, how do porn stars do it? i mean, it seems like they NEVER have this cervix problem. is there some secret they dont know? i'm jealous!

They get paid to act like they don't have a cervix problem?

WintertimeLove, I really don't think that people meant to imply that your BF was being inconsiderate. There have been recent posts in which some people have blamed any discomfort/penetration issues on the woman, and some people tend to go on the defensive.

You and your BF sound like you're willing to work on this as a couple. Kudos to you and good luck!