Expressions for women to use on those "high stress" days ...

[Isabella Thorne]

.... or at any other good opportunity!

1. You...off my planet!

2. Not the brightest crayon in the box now, are we?

3. Well, this day was a total waste of makeup.

4. Errors have been made. Others will be blamed.

5. And your crybaby whiny-assed opinion would be...?

6. I'm not crazy, I've just been in a very bad mood for 30 years.

7. Allow me to introduce my selves.

8. Sarcasm is just one more service we offer.

9. Whatever kind of look you were going for, you missed.

10. I'm just working here until a good fast-food job opens up.

11. I'm trying to imagine you with a personality.

12. Stress is when you wake up screaming and you realize you weren't asleep.

13. I can't remember if I'm the good twin or the evil one.

14. How many times do I have to flush before you go away?

15. I just want revenge. Is that so wrong?

16. You say I'm a bitch like it's a bad thing.

17. Can I trade this job for what's behind door #2?

18. Nice perfume. Must you marinate in it?

19. Chaos, panic, and disorder - my work here is done.

20. Earth is full. Go home.

21. Is it time for your medication or mine?

22. How do I set a laser printer to stun?

23. I'm not tense, just terribly, terribly alert.

.... By all means share with other women in stressful positions.
____________________________
Working 9 - 5
what a way to make a living ...

 

[Guest]

 

[VanC]

"Zero to bitch in ten seconds" is my personal favourite

Foxy as if you could be a bitch-- you pussycat

 

[BlkPnthr]

Hey, I resent that Isabella! I use that crayon expression and I am male

 

[Pixie]

25 Things You'd Love to Say at Work but Can't

1. I can see your point, but I still think you're full of it.

2. I don't know what your problem is, but I'll bet it's hard to pronounce.

3. How about never? Is never good for you?

4. I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public. This is good!

5. I'm really easy to get along with once you people learn to see it my way.

6. I'll try being nicer if you'll try being smarter.

7. I'm out of my mind, but feel free to leave a message.

8. I don't work here. I'm a consultant.

9. It sounds like English, but I can't understand a word you're saying.

10. Ahhh ... I see the screw-up fairy has visited us again.

11. I like you. You remind me of when I was young and stupid.

12. You are validating my inherent mistrust of strangers.

13. I have plenty of talent and vision. I just don't give a damn.

14. I'm already visualizing the duct tape over your mouth.

15. Thank you. We're all refreshed and challenged by your unique point of view.

16. Any connection between your reality and mine is purely coincidental.

17. What am I? Flypaper for freaks!?

18. I'm not being rude. You're just insignificant.

19. It's a thankless job, but I've got a lot of karma to burn off.

20. Yes, I am an agent of Satan, but my duties are largely ceremonial.

21. Do I look like a people person?

22. This isn't an office. It's Hell with fluorescent lighting.

23. I started out with nothing and still have most of it left.

24. A cubicle is just a padded cell without a door.

25. Too many freaks, not enough circuses.

 

[Guest]

 

[Isabella Thorne]

Men and Women unite ...

oh yea Panther darling ...

soooo true cheri ... my mistake ...

these expressions can be used by both genders ....

 

[Isabella Thorne]

Pass the booze ...

16 REASONS WHY ALCOHOL SHOULD BE SERVED AT WORK...

1. It's an incentive to show up.
2. It leads to more honest communications.
3. It reduces complaints about low pay.
4. Employees tell management what they think, not what they want to hear.
5. It encourages car pooling.
6. Increase job satisfaction because if you have a bad job, you don't care.
7. It eliminates vacations because people would rather come to work.
8. It makes fellow employees look better.
9. It makes the cafeteria food taste better.
10. Bosses are more likely to hand out raises when they are wasted.
11. Salary negotiations are a lot more profitable.
12. Employees work later since there's no longer a need to relax at the bar.
13. It makes everyone more open with their ideas.
14. Eliminates the need for employees to get drunk on their lunch break.
15. Employees no longer need coffee to sober up.
16. Sitting "Bare ass" on the copy machine will no longer be seen as gross."
_________________________
She works hard for the money
so you better treat her right ...

~Donna Summers~