Excuse Me...But I Think There's Been Some Mistake....

[Misty_Morning]

I don't really understand what to make of this. Over the past several weeks I have been inundated with questionaires, informative brouchures, and forms for information packets that are directed towards senior citizens.

At first I thought it was kinda funny cuz I have this phobia about getting older. Well, today I got an invatation to join AARP. And I'm not laughing.

I wonder if a friend of mine is trying to be funny and has requested some information in my name which has put me on some type of old folks mailing list.

Generally, it really wouldn't bother me ALL THAT MUCH, but like I said I'm getting a little sensitive about my age. Plus I really HATE getting mail of any kind, especially junk mail. What a fucking waste of resources.

So, what I want to know is if there's a web site I can go and get my name taken off of any type of mailing list.

Also, I have a pretty good idea which friend may be responsible for this...so if any of you have any suggestions on suitable retribution I would greatly appreciate any suggestions.

 

[The_Fool]

Porn Mailings if they are straighlaced.

Religious mailings if they are not.

 

[minsue]

AARP takes its information from public records, as far as I know. You may want to run a credit check to make sure you aren't a victim of identity theft or something, just in case.

 

[scheherazade_79]

I know there's a website in the UK where you can stop junk mail, and I should imagine there's something in the US.

On the other hand, you could just go with it - if it gets you lots of discounts with things, what's the harm?

As far as revenge... signed for deliveries of incontinence panties? Give their details to the Church of Scientology? Get in touch with the Jehova's Witnesses, and have them pay a home visit

But the down side to all this is that if it is that person, and they guess it's you... this conflict could rumble on for a very long time...

 

[Jenny_Jackson]

Want all the penis extention ads I get, Misty_Morning? I'll gladly forward them to you.

 

[Misty_Morning]

Actually this has been going on since 1983. Usually there's a year or two lull before one of us will strike again.

Get in touch with the Jehova's Witnesses, and have them pay a home visit

Ahhh, yea...that's what started this whole thing...I was visiting my friend who worked the graveyard shift at a hospital. ShHe had all these signs up around her door saying things like "Daysleeper...Knock on this door and you die". Well, I was sitting watching a video when there was a knock on the door. It was the Jehovah's Witness folks.

I told them that it must have been devine intervention that they were sent there on that particular day cuz I was having a spiritual crisis and was praying to God for help. I also told them I would love to invite them in and talk but that I had house guests that had been traveling all night and were sleeping, thus the signs.

I then gave them a sizable cash donation and gave them my friends information (saying it was me). I then asked them to come back, and when they do, pleasebe sure to knock really loud cuz I'm hard of hearing. And also, don't give up too early cuz I might be out back working in the yard or something.


Well, for about the next two years every time I talked to or saw my friend she kept complaining abot the crazy JW and all the shit she had been putting up with. One day I just could not keep a straight face and the cat was out of the bag....and the race was on to see who could out do the other.......

 

[rgraham666]

I got asked for my senior's card by some pimply little snot not long ago.

I was strongly tempted to demonstrate that statistics and reality are not the same thing.

 

[Vermilion]

Someone suggested porn for the straightlaced, religious stuff for the open-minded. I am here to suggest something equally offensive to either: - tupperware.

x
V

ps- Misty - you got fucked yesterday? What's happening? Is it on? Is it off? It's like an intriguing soap opera...

 

[R. Richard]

As to the AARP people. Assuming that they have a toll free number, I would call then and tell them, "I have your literature. I want all those nice senior discounts. I'm only 22-years-old, but I have lived a really hard life and I was just wondering if I could qualify?" Chances are, you will not qualify.

 

[rachlou]

I know there's a website in the UK where you can stop junk mail, and I should imagine there's something in the US.

PLEASE give me the url of this website - i am fed up of junk mail...

 

[Misty_Morning]

Someone suggested porn for the straightlaced, religious stuff for the open-minded. I am here to suggest something equally offensive to either: - tupperware.

Ohhhh...you are EVIL.

ps- Misty - you got fucked yesterday? What's happening? Is it on? Is it off? It's like an intriguing soap opera...

It was a breif encounter with the FB. I was weak. I'm supposed to talk to the GF(ex?) tomorrow and potentially get together to watch the superbowl on Sunday. I'm not gonna tell her about yesterday as we might be broken up anyways. So technically it don't count.

 

[Vermilion]

Ohhhh...you are EVIL.




It was a breif encounter with the FB. I was weak. I'm supposed to talk to the GF(ex?) tomorrow and potentially get together to watch the superbowl on Sunday. I'm not gonna tell her about yesterday as we might be broken up anyways. So technically it don't count.

Fair point. You're on a break...
x
V

 

[Vermilion]

ps- not just evil, but sneaky, cunning and conniving also...
x
V

 

[mjl2010]

Could be serious

You need to check your credit report and also talk to the SSA. (social security). Don't wait get on it. AARP gets their info from public records. The fast that you are suddenly getting offers means that somewhere, your age is messed up. Find out where because this could mean big problems later on.

MJL

 

[Quiet_Cool]

You need to check your credit report and also talk to the SSA. (social security). Don't wait get on it. AARP gets their info from public records. The fast that you are suddenly getting offers means that somewhere, your age is messed up. Find out where because this could mean big problems later on.

MJL

I dunno if it's really something to be concerned with as far as AARP is concerned. I get them as well, or have at least gotten one. I'm 29, and I really don't think it's that uncommon for these type things to be sent out wrong. My father just started getting them, and he's not retired yet, or even that close to the age, either.

It never hurts to check, but...

Something else; if I'm right, you may want to take it easy on the friend, Misty. You don't wanna get on the opposite side of that whole payback deal.

Q_C

 

[Svenskaflicka]

I then gave them a sizable cash donation and gave them my friends information (saying it was me). I then asked them to come back, and when they do, pleasebe sure to knock really loud cuz I'm hard of hearing. And also, don't give up too early cuz I might be out back working in the yard or something.

Serves you right, then, doesn't it?

Seriously... how about an ad in the paper where you (in her name) offer to predict people's future? We used to have something similar in my family for each time someone had an even 10th birthday, you know, someone turning 40 or something like that... we had a couple showing up at my dad's birthday expecting to attend a seminar on Sheparding In A Modern Society. We send the disappointed and embarrassed couple off with a few sheep-meat sandwiches and got back at the evil-doers by placing out large signs in the neighbourhood where we

• offered to buy berries
• offered to SELL berries
• offered to sell the household dog
• offered advice and therapy for those with a sexual dysfunction

all in their names, of course.

They received a lot of phone calls the next few weeks...