Eee! The president is coming!

[shereads]

The one that can sign a book! And even read one! I'm on my way now to the book signing by Bill and Bill Junior. Astonishingly, we are not allowed to bring anything except car keys and our book - no handbag, no cell phone, no camera. Like me, you are no doubt thinking, "No condoms?" I know, it's shockingly irresponsible, considering.

It's a long line, though, so chances are it won't make any difference to those at the back.



President Smoove B C! Presidnet of Interplanetary Cocoa Love.

 

[shereads]

"To summarize my feelings, I love you, and that fact is inscrutable."

~ Smoove B

 

[amicus]

One could offer a cigar, Presidential size...

 

[cantdog]

I knew a rabbit breeder once, a fellow fireman, thought he could get rich, y'know. He said the male rabbits hump wicked fast, and then freeze in place, as it were, going "eeeee-e-e-e-e!"

That was his description, with a re-enactment at the supper table. So I thought that the president was coming, if you understand me.


cantdog

 

[dr_mabeuse]

Which reminds me: do we have any evidence that George W. Bush has ever read a book in his life? Aside from "The Happy Goat" or whatever he was reading in that school on 9/11. I guess he made it through Yale, but I know guys who went through college without ever cracking a book. During the campaign he was asked what book has most influenced his thinking and he said "the bible". Good political answer, and just what you'd say if you hadn't read a book in your life.

Do you think he's ever read a history of the Viet Nam war? Do you think that, when people start talking about Iraq as a 'quagmire', he has any idea of what they're talking about?

---dr.M.

 

[shereads]

One could offer a cigar, Presidential size...

Do they make cigars that size?

 

[shereads]

Which reminds me: do we have any evidence that George W. Bush has ever read a book in his life? Aside from "The Happy Goat" or whatever he was reading in that school on 9/11.

I thought you had seen F9/11, Dr. M. The book is "My Pet Goat," and Dubya doesn't read it. He watches someone else read it.

 

[shereads]

Well, former president Clinton and I had quite an afternoon! He must have been exhausted when he finally left Books & Books after autographing 1,996 of the 2000 copies that were sold with tickets for the signing. The other four books belonged to me, my friend C., and the lovely Brazilian couple we met at Ruth's Chris Steak House across the street, where the four of us shared a table at the window and toasted the Clinton years with the first Bloody Marys I've had in years.

Having arrived by cab in time to see the first of five heat-stroke victims taken away by ambulance as the six-to-seven-block-long crowd enjoyed one of the sunniest, hottest days of summer, we decided to have an early dinner in the president's honor. The air conditioning was a little colder than one would wish, dressed as we were in sleeveless dresses, but I can't complain about the quality of the food. I was a little peeved that our waiter, Richard, refused to deliver a "one pound baked potato with all the trimmings" to the president, who has been on Atkins and was probably craving some carbs after all that wrist work. Richard, a loyal Republican and Bush supporter, explained that he admires Clinton's intelligence but can't forgive him for lying.

He was kind enough to wrap my leftover steak and flourless chocolate espresso cake, while I joined C. and our new Brazilian friends on the sidewalk to wave at the departing motorcade and chant "Four more years!" (The others were acting that way because they'd been drinking all afternoon. I did it because I didn't want Bill to think the four missing tickets were a sign of disrespect.)

Later, one of the Gables police officers who was with the security detail, signed my book, "You were the best. William Jefferson Clinton."

 

[cantdog]

Doubtless the only sig without signs of writer's cramp.

 

[shereads]

Doubtless the only sig without signs of writer's cramp.

Would you like to buy an autographed book? You can have the first shot at it before it goes on e-bay.

 

[Svenskaflicka]

*thinking of ways to use car keys as a weapon*

 

[Somme]

*hoping no-one inhaled.....*

 

[Guest]

I thought you had seen F9/11, Dr. M. The book is "My Pet Goat," and Dubya doesn't read it. He watches someone else read it.

another pic for you Sher.. im speechless...

 

[minsue]

another pic for you Sher.. im speechless...

Oh, that's so bad.

 

[shereads]

another pic for you Sher.. im speechless...

Godalmighty, vella. Why don't you just TEAR OUT OUR EYES WITH A PLASTIC SPORK for chrissake.

This is worse than the classic photo of Dan Quayle trying to shake hands with a police dog. (Quayle is holding out the wrong paw, which seems to puzzle the dog.)